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jnette jnette (New Member) New Member

What's it REALLY like to be in your sixties???

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As many of you here have learned to know me quite well over the past ten years, you may also have noticed I have become much less visible the past 6 mos. or more.. spending far less time of late chatting up a storm as has been my "norm".

So I'm wondering.... I know not many of you out there are in your 60's yet, but for those of you who might be... did you notice yourself changing?

I have. And I'm not quite sure what to make of it. I don't even know it they are positive changes or if I like them. Don't know if I am "morphing", "evolving", "regressing".. or what. Is this a normal "life cycle" change?

I do know I have become more introspective, spending a lot of my time contemplating..thinking about things, both the past and the future. I have become acutely aware of my "time clock".. of the fact that there is indeed a time limit on my continued existence here on this earth.

( "ok.. time's up !) :eek: LOL !!! you know..."Time to get out of the pool." :rotfl:

Seriously..I do see my life now as the rapidly falling grains of sand in the hour glass. Not that any of that bothers me... it's not a "negative" for me. What DOES bother me is that I have become so vividly AWARE of this reality lately, that it is indeed a reality. Even 10 years ago, my mindset was that I would be around forever and a day... but suddenly I'm thinking in terms of "rationed time".. or a time "allotment". That's not morbid, is it? I don't FEEL it is... I feel it more as exploring a whole new concept.. something I've not thought through before.. it was always something far away, far into the future. But lately, it's no longer "in the future"... it's the here and now, and I feel like I'm stepping over into unchartered territory.

I'm finding I like my "peace and quiet" more than I ever have before. I find that I am content to just spend my off days at home... in my backyard surrounded by the sounds of nature. I crave it.

I find myself making mental notes of what I need to sort through and organize for that "someday" so that my children won't have chaos on their hands deciding what is what, what is where, what is important or not, and what do do with it all. I have made lists of where to find the important papers, banking info, keys to the fireproof safety box... have a goal of cleaning out the rest of the basement and all my "junk drawers", etc. and getting rid of all the unneccessary "stuff" over the next ten years, before I get too old , feeble, or disabled to do so.... and so my kids won't have to. I want to have everything "in order" before I am incapable of tending to these things.

I think of what I'd like to still do in the next ten years, because after all, I'm thinking at best, I only have that to really enjoy with reasonably good health.. I hope.

And I know... I KNOW... I am truly looking forward to retirement. Never thought I'd hear myself say that, but anymore, I can hardly wait. I have suddenly realized to my shock that I no longer HAVE to "strive".. to "accomplish"... to push, push, push... climb that ladder... achieve.... "acquire"........ that in itself is an overwhelming, mind rattling experience. Hard to get my head around, hard to get use to this novel reality.

I have all I need and then some. I am financially stable, our bills are paid. Not wealthy by any means, no huge nest egg anywhere, but not in debt, nor have any intentions of being so ever again. I've worked HARD the past five years on whittling away at our debts and finally paying them off.

But when you're "young"... you're always working (literally) TOWARD something in the future... be it a home of your own, a new vehicle, all the multitudes of your childrens' needs and wants.. that special vacation... whatever. There's always something you're working toward and working FOR.

It has been a real eye opener and epiphany for me lately when I realized that I no longer am working TOWARD anything... I have DONE that. I have reached that elusive time in the future... that future is now my present.

So now what? Where to from here? :coollook:

I find myself in a unfamiliar place now... I'm living in what has been all these years that "someday".. the "future".

So yes, I can finally relax and look forward in the next year or two to cutting back on my hours..go to 4 days a week, then down to 3 days a week, and once I hit 65, I'm soooooooooooo outta there !!! :D

Not that I don't like my work.. I do... very much. BUT... I no longer like the "have to". I don't want to "have to" ANYTHING anymore !!! And it's very liberating to know that soon I WON'T "have to" do anything but what I WANT, WHEN I want.

How cool is THAT? :yeah:

But then again.... you spend 60 years of your life "having to" (first as a child minding your parents' wishes, then as a working, taxpaying adult)... then all you get is a skimpy 10-20 years to enjoy doing what YOU want? Something's not quite fair about that, don't you think? And who knows what quality of life you'll even have those 10-20 years. If you're lucky, you'll be relatively healthy and can still get about, travel, etc. But never, EVER as well as you could.

Let's face it... the ol' body starts rusting and falling apart at 60, I don't care HOW healthy you are !!! Long evening walks hurt the foot bones, the long dreamed about days of freedom and TIME to travel may now include towing along a porta potty ... what fun is swimming when you can no longer jump/dive off the high dive for fear of cracking every osteopenic bone in your body if you land wrong... and you still long to go down that crazy water slide but you have multiple bruises and skin tears from the last time and your kids freak out because they fear their "aging mother" will be injured beyond repair? :mad:

So....what say you? Have YOU been in this strange place already? Am I ok? (LOL!!!) You had BETTER respond with a resounding "ABSOLUTELY, Netters" !!! :D

Did any one else go through this? Did you find yourself going through not only the very noticeable physical changes, but that you spent a good portion of your time trying to find yourself in this new and unfamiliar place?

Any input greatly appreciated. If I don't hear from anyone, I'll know I'm the only lonely soul out there in her 60's....and I will NOT be happy !!! :rotfl:

Edited by jnette

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I'm not 60 yet, and maybe it's not quite the same, but I have found myself thinking more of Maslow and his pyramid. But in your case, the introspection may not be so much from your age, but from the 1 year anniversary that is only weeks away. (((((jnette)))))

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Thank you, Kolohe.. :)

Oh, I know Mutti's passing has been a part of this..and this summer is difficult for me as I am constantly reminded and miss all the things we use to do with her.. even just sitting on the front porch. The memories are so vivid..everywhere I look around here, I still see her and miss her.

Yet.. the change encompasses more than that... I'm noticing multiple physical changes... bothersome "age related" ones. No fair.

What throws me is that it never bothered me turning 30, 40, even 50... never gave it a thought. But I've noticed the physical changes since turning 60...and a pronounced awareness of a "time clock". Next on the chopping block. baaaahahaha ! I guess I'm becoming very aware of my own mortality... something I never gave much thought to before. ;)

The "golden years" are a big farce. :rotfl:

Edited by jnette

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The introspection is interesting. Almost every time I take care of a patient that's superold...i.e. greater than 85...they never need the TV or radio to entertain them. They just sit in the chair comtemplating. Maybe they started easing into that at around 60.

In my opinion 60 is too young to give into physical decline. Jack Lalane, and others will tell you, that doesn't have to happen that "young". But even Jack will tell he that at 90-whatever he can't do what he used to do when he was much younger. Old age happens to those of us whom don't die, but I think you should still slide down that water slide.

Turning 60 is a turning point and I would think it natural that you take pause.

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i think an increasing awareness/consciousness, sounds perfectly natural as we age.

i seem to do a mini-life review, every decade...

except the older you are, there more there is to review.:cool:

then, wisdom is gradually replaced by excitement and curiousity.

compound that with mutti's forthcoming anniversary (which you've been thinking about for months, anyways), and an increasing awareness of physical limitations...

it seems inevitable that mellowing and acceptance, would be the final outcome.

i never, ever thought i'd be saying this to you jnette...

but you sound perfectly normal.:D

much love to you.

it's all good.

leslie

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.....i never, ever thought i'd be saying this to you jnette...

but you sound perfectly normal.:D

leslie

LOL. You are so sweet......

I wonder if in the distant future when you turn 60 we'll be able to say that YOU are normal......... nah, I doubt it. :chair: :D :lol2:

((((leslie)))) How you been? Did you miss me? Uh, that was a rhetorical question; please don't answer..... at least not in front of God and everybody.... :D

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I wonder if in the distant future when you turn 60 we'll be able to say that YOU are normal......... nah, I doubt it. :chair: :D :lol2:

trust me, and unlike jnette, I WON'T ASK IF I'M NORMAL!:lol2::lol2::lol2:

(i'd hate to hear God giggle at such a question.)

but i can assure you, i'll still be wearing my baseball caps and uggs.

perhaps nothing else, depending on my state of mind, but i digress...

leslie

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Me too Jnatte.

I will be 66 later this year.

Still working but way fewer days (or nights). If I work 12 houts I need two days to recover.

Yes fewer goals. Feel so very blessed.

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Notice how everyone who's posting on here is over 50? ;)

Not being anywhere close to 60 myself (yeah, I'll turn around twice and be approaching it at the speed of light), I can't really offer any words of wisdom to you, Netters, except that you sound exceedingly normal. I have a sister who's almost 64 and a hubby who'll be 60 in February, and they both have a number of medical issues that have slowed them down a lot. But both of them are reasonably content with life, and they're reaching out for new things---my sister recently became a court-appointed special advocate for abused children, and DH is in the process of figuring out his next steps in life instead of focusing on decline. I'd say they are both good examples of life in the key of sixty. :)

And, not to sound glib or anything, but being around them makes me feel positively young at "only" 51. ;)

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I am 61 and in many ways, my life has never been better. I certainly have never been happier than I am now. My children are responsible adults, employed, paying their own bills, and giving me grandkids! My spouse is retired, but very busy with life after a career of 38 years as an airline pilot (which he doesn't miss even a little bit.) I absolutely love having him around every day.

We are comfortable financially, but very concerned about where all of it will be when our grandson is older. That is a definite worry. Maybe time to invest in gold.

We do have health challenges, but all in all, we meet them and conquer them. I may have to have shoulder surgery, but since I have 40 years of plans yet to complete, I'll do that and conquer that too.

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Have really enjoyed this discussion. I have another 5 years before I cross the "60" threshhold, so can't yet add my own personal recollection.

This is the way society looks at people over 60:

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=izX3eCEmS88[/YOUTUBE]

- OR -

AuntBee11.JPG

Instead, this is the face of the contemporary post-60 crowd:

Joyce_Meyer.jpg

tinaturner.jpg

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I am pushing 62 hard. I will be at the Soc. Sec. office in a couple of months to start paperwork. I can't lift as much as I used to. I can't do long hours unless I get lots of breaks. The one thing that really bothers me is the arthritis in my thumbs. I can't open a dang lettuce bag, bagged cheese is an impossibility. I rarely can open any jar. I can walk a couple of miles before the feet get too bad and I am swimming now rather than beat the poor knees walking more. I garden hunched over because I can't kneel due to the diseased knees. Arthritis is an unwelcome guest in my body.

I do think more and react less. I am less likely to open my mouth. I don't get as angry at dumb things as I used to.

As a widow wanting a companion to share things with I still look at most men my age and think, he looks old. Or he acts old. I think I look younger than I am, I don't dress like an old woman, and in general don't think of myself as old. I was married to a younger man so perhaps they look older by comparison. Or perhaps he helped me to stay young.

I don't need a TV often, I find quiet time is nice but still am very busy every day. I don't feel any count down or think "it will be time to get out of the pool soon". I don't expect to live many more years but want to live the time I have fully. I contemplate while I am doing things. I rarely sit and think.

I don't know that I am normal or not normal. I am what I am. Being in my sixties has freed me to be that.

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