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What are dealbreakers for you?

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A deal breaker for me is someone who does not show any affection. I am dealing with this now... I can't touch him. Might as well hang out with my brother.

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I don't know...I don't like clingy people, but I don't want someone who is distant. I have to be honest, the substance abuse would depend if they are trying to kick the habit. If not, then it's a deal breaker; if they are, then I would date them. I wouldn't want to be the breadwinner in the house, but would not knock someone due to their job that doesn't pay as much as my (future) job as a nurse. I don't like people who belittle others, especially to make themselves feel good or relieve their anxiety (defense mechanism, got it, but get over it; it's not attractive to put others down). They must like animals (no snakes or any other repulsive creature, please; this is an opinion statement). I am thinking like they must like dogs, cats, domestic mice/rats, horses, etc. Yes, please have good hygiene; however, I don't count discolored teeth as poor hygiene. Sorry, it's not necessarily so because as you get older and also younger people who eat/drink stuff that stains their teeth, you get discolored teeth. It doesn't mean you don't brush, floss, rinse, etc. I don't like smoking.

I like well groomed people, but please do not be so "well groomed" or "high maintenance" that you refuse to do anything.

I don't care about your political views, but please don't push them down my throat and tell me I am wrong for mine.

Don't like people who use threatening, manipulative techniques or play mind games.

Oh, and DO NOT act like a know-it-all. Here's a secret...the people who act like they know it all, typically, know the least. And you wouldn't want to make yourself look dumb, now would you?

I also want someone who would be in it for the long haul. I can be very hard to be around at times *cue Lee Brice's Hard to Love song*, but if you don't want to work things out; then, please don't ask me out. The quote that summarizes me best about this aspect is the one by Marilyn Monroe that mentions something like "...I make mistakes, I am out of control, and at times a little hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure don't deserve me at my best". And that's the way I feel about it.

So...

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momma's boy

Daddy's girl.

Trust me, no woman is as great and perfect as her daddy tells her. :)

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. . . .I also have a 17 yr old son, with a different woman. I have had full custody of him since he was 2 and I have never received a penny of the court ordereod child support. Talk about a DEADBEAT!! She cries to the judge that she just can't afford to pay me and the judges keep letting it slide. I am quite sure if it was reversed and it was me that could not pay I would already have been thrown in jail.

I'm sure she didn't mean that there aren't any vindictive POS mothers who hurt their children for their own needs. Guys in your situation normally display some anger, when you get sort of a vague answer that sounds somewhat indifferent, it's just a red flag. Might not mean anything.

Anyway, bless you for raising your child as a single dad. I didn't get regular child support either, but I still took the kids to see their dad every summer and Christmas. I grew up in a custody mess and swore I would never do that to my own children. It's amazing how quickly 18 years pass by, really.

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infidelity

lying

lack of ethics

lack of empathy

doesn't treat his family well

illegal drug use

 

Like Goonie, I've been off the market quite awhile, and our issues tend to center around the occasional "You left

the cap off the toothpaste again!" or "Why did you put the cracker box back when there was just ONE miserable cracker left?" :wacky:

 

Guess I'm gettin' old.:yes:

Edited by sharpeimom
omitted a word

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momma's boy

i'm curious as to how you define "momma's boy".

it's funny, in that when i first started dating ed, i used to affectionately call him a momma's boy.

many of our dates revolved around going to his mum's house and swimming in their pool.

he would call her several times a day.

she would call him when we were out on dates.

their relationship was incredibly close.

yet, he adored his mum...cherished her, honored her, respected her.

eddie treated her like the queen she truly was.

i married a momma's boy.

25 yrs later, it is the best choice i ever made.

leslie :inlove:

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lack of compassion

wants to do all the talking and never listen

thinks anything house-related is "woman's work"

doesn't think men need to know how to cook or do laundry

thinks child care is "woman's work"

won't apologize when he's wrong

won't say "I love you" except during sex

disappears when you get sick yet expects you to drop everything when he sneezes to cater to his every whim

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Pot heads! ((they always find me haha))

Cigarettes

Bald, or receding hairlines (i'm 25)

A lot of female "friends". I aint buying it

Texting me pics of their you know what!! (that is NOT a message I wanna wake up to) LOL

Insisting I have more than 1 drink in hopes that my standards (and clothes) will drop

There's tons more but making this list made me realize how happy I am to not be single. At 25 the dating scene is brutal and grotesque

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I wasn't very much older than the above poster when I met my husband and I never would have fallen in love with a pretty neat guy.

He's about as bald as Dr. Phil is, but I looked beyond. He swears he's been that bald since he was abut six!:eek: :yes:

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The OP pretty must lists most of my no-no's. I shared my "list" with my co-worker, who is married and about 10 years older than me. She called me "picky" :dead:

-No clingy guys. I cancelled a date with a 25 year old guy because from his CONSTANT text messages I determined that I have no interest in dating a clingy 15 year old girl. I need space. I don't need is a guy telling me over and over "I miss you" and "I'm thinking about you" before I have a real date.

-Can't be younger than me. You have to be born at least the day before me. I literally have a date and time limit.

-Can't be shorter than me. I'm 5'3". Enough said.

-No kids. I know this may seem really rude, however I just turned 24 and I can't even imagine having kids right now in my life. Dating a guy with kids is really intense and I'm not ready for that type of emotional investment. There's no such thing as "just dating the dad". You date the whole family. I love kids. Especially babies. I just don't want any right now. Power to all the single dads out there :cat:

-Hates cats. I will question the validity of your soul.

-Describes current career as "Get Money" or something extremely vague where it's obvious you're jobless and broke most of the time. Not to hate on those guys out there looking for a job (I was unemployed for 8 months), but I need you to be actively doing something with your life. I make a lot of money right now and I'm not looking to be with (another guy) where I spent all my money on him or he can't spend anything on me. I'm not materialistic, but if you can't manage to get me a balloon from the dollar tree I can't afford to give you gas money to see me. Note: If you're broke because you're in school/work and you make enough to get by that's understandable. If you're broke because you sit your behind at home all day and have a billion pairs of sneakers then NO.

-Jealous. Ewwwww. Or guys that won't "allow" you to have other guy friends. I'm not a jealous girl and if I don't trust you I won't be with you.

-Guys who lie to "make me happy". I'm not saying you have to be a jerk, but be honest. If I ask do I look fat in that dress I'm not going to flip out if you say yes. I'm also more than willing to let you know if the tux is too tight or outdated. If you want to go to the club with your friends go ahead! Just don't lie and say you're going to watch the game or whatever.

-Super skinny guys. I'm a big girl (size 18 US) and I feel like I'm going to break a skinny guy. I like to cuddle and it's a lot more comfy when the guy is "fluffy" or is pumped up.

-Has an iPhone. Just kidding! I'm not that insane. But if you're very, very anti-Android/Google we will have major problems.

-Tries to sleep with me on the first date. If it makes me "stuck up" so be it. Bye! :wavey:

-Smoker. I don't smoke and have never smoked anything. And kissing an ashtray isn't cute. I may make an exception for an occasional smoker and I don't tolerate guys who call me "stuck up" for not wanting to try weed or be around it.

-Alcoholic/Drunk every week. I have alcoholics in my family and I don't need to date one.

So yeah I'm a picky girl who's no fun. Probably why I'm still single. :laugh:

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i'm curious as to how you define "momma's boy".

it's funny, in that when i first started dating ed, i used to affectionately call him a momma's boy.

many of our dates revolved around going to his mum's house and swimming in their pool.

he would call her several times a day.

she would call him when we were out on dates.

their relationship was incredibly close.

yet, he adored his mum...cherished her, honored her, respected her.

eddie treated her like the queen she truly was.

i married a momma's boy.

25 yrs later, it is the best choice i ever made.

leslie :inlove:

Loving, respecting, and taking care of the woman that raised him is appropriate. A man who can't make any decision without first consulting his mother, or who will not place his wife first in his life, is a momma's boy.

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