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Wednesday April 22 2020. Earth Day

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Morning

Was nervous about yesterday, usually am returning from a day off, but it was fine, and productive.  Still need to complete 2 questionnaires before the end of the month, has been hard with the lack of responses this month.  Probably nothing to worry about, but I think this ongoing pandemic is putting me on edge

Got my bike back from the bike shop and rode it a bit yesterday, though it was a bit cold

Should be a calmer day at work today, hopefully it will still be productive 

Going to be a rainy day today, in the 50s

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Good Morning -

Joe - It's good that work, yesterday, was fine and productive. As for being on edge?? It's natural, and certainly understandable, given the "new reality" that we live in. I have an underlying "irritability" that can also be described as "tense", "worried", "fearful" (all of the above). Keeping my mind occupied with anything seems to help. Hang in there, my friend. 🙂

Well. . . Guess what it did just a little while ago?!?!? It Snowed! SNOWED!! Again!!! What the heck?!?!? There's about 1/2 to 1 inch on the ground  Gotta admit, it pissed me off!! I also think it confused a Robin that was looking for food on our front lawn. Poor thing. It seemed to have flown away in bitter disappointment. Actually, I think I heard the Robin curse the weather gods. (You can hear this faint, "Damn you, weather gods!!" come from its teeny-tiny beak!) Now the sun is attempting to show its warmer, shiner self. Sure do wish the weather gods would make up its mind. Is it Spring? Is it Winter? No one seems to know. Stupid weather!! (Whine!)

Speaking of whining. . . I'm working tonight and tomorrow night. I have no desire to go to work. None. I feel a little selfish, with this, interestingly enough. At least I have a job. Other people lost their jobs due to this pandemic. Still, I just do NOT want to go to work. There are more and more Covid-19 patients on the Med/Surg floor. They're there for rehabilitation after experiencing the worst effects of the virus at our larger "sister hospital". Gotta admit, going into the room of a Covid-19 positive patient scares me a little. I do it. I do it because it's my job. I do it because I also care for the human-being who still needs some support from the effects of this freakin' virus. But it scares me. At least I KNOW that these patients in our "airborne- precautions" rooms have the Covid-19 virus. When I float down to the ER (which us ICU Nurses do quite often), no one truly knows if that new patient coming through the ER doors have this virus. We take precautions, of course. But those precautions are NOT the full "airborne precautions" if the on-coming patient screens "negative" when answering those questions asked EVERYONE who walks through our teeny-tiny hospital's doors. Someone who screens "negative" could easily be one of those carriers of the virus and not know it.

Ahh. . . the mind wonders. . . . 

Anyway. . . I'm working tonight and tomorrow night. I'll probably be floated to either the ER or the Med/Surg floor. The Med/Surg floor, especially, is understaffed for both nights.  Happily, I'm off the week-end (including Friday). 

Apologies for the whiney post. I'm tired . . . emotionally tired. Just gotta "let it out", and carry on with life. 

Peace, folks. . . 

Ted

Edited by Ted

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Good morning!

Joe, hope you have a good day.  I totally understand being on edge.

Ted, again it's understandable to have real feelings about things.  Just because we aren't in New York City dealing with what they are dealing with, or unemployed worrying about not having a paycheck, doesn't mean we're not under stress that we need to talk about.

BC, eating carbs again???  I was curious and a national yeast shortage is a thing.  One of my friends who is a good cook, but never baked bread is now into bread making.  I guess it's a trend.  We apparently have a shortage of yeast here.  He got a sourdough starter instead.  Just ribbing you about the carbs, as you know very well I approve of carbs.  

Baloney, my sister lives close to her grandkids and can't see them.  These are hard times for families.

Herring, sounds like you're taking care of yourself.  That article about the hypoxia was very interesting.  Wonder if work should start taking our pulse ox in addition to our temps.  But I might spot check myself anyway.

Dianah, I love lentil soup and have made a gazillion recipes a gazillion times.

 

Speaking of stress I had to ask to be removed from a co-workers text message group we started when we closed.  Remember we re-opened with nursing home patients.  They tested negative at the nursing home by the state, and they tested negative at our hospital, but because of the exposure they want them in a separate ward anyway.  Nurses are stressed out because they aren't giving us N95 masks to care for them.  I asked "why should they, they need to save those for the positive patients, and in case there's a surge in positive cases and these patients tested negative twice."  The negative clap back I received with the "what if...you never know...there are false negatives...this is ridiculous" really disappointed me and I asked to be removed from the group and haven't heard a peep since.  I understand what they are saying, and the place of stress they are at,  but the can't stand the drama and negativity as if they are asked to go into a Covid positive room bare naked.  

If these patients find homes or their old facility opens up and they return it's likely our unit may close down again as census continues to be low.  But it's nice to have beds and nurses should the need arise, or should another nursing home evacuate.

Today is my usual day to cook, shop and get ready for a couple of work days and I'm usually alone, so the lock down doesn't bother me at least today.  

Hope everyone has a great day.

 

Edited by Tweety

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Hi. I understand the anxiety and irritability . I am taking a mental health day, actually half day today. I just am tired of getting bounced around from role to role every 4 hours. I am tired of the chaos, poor management, and seeing all the stress among my coworkers. I hate having to eat lunch in my car so that I can have 30 minutes uninterrupted without a mask.  And I'm tired of wearing a mask all day, that gets sweaty and fogs up my glasses. We have to wear our own cloth masks. I wouldn't mind a surgical mask the is so much lighter, but those are critical, ya know. Yes, I know this is nothing compared to the nurses in hot spots, but I need a break. 

It's raining today so my plan to ride my bike is on hold. But I need to get out because dh is working from home and most of his day is spent shouting into his phone. Maybe I'll sit in bed with my computer and earbuds and watch Netflix. I might have some ancient yeast in the cupboard. I think if I soak a little in warm water and it bubbles a little it may be usable.  

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Hey all-

It's cold and windy, and spitting snow here.  Meh.  I'm annoyed today.  Apparently my boss thinks we (the other providers) are sitting on the couch all day, watching Netflix and eating bon bons.  I'm not seeing the same number of patients I see in the office, but I'm also doing a lot of admin stuff like prior authorizations, refills, work excuses, checking the practice voicemail, etc, that I normally don't do when I have a medical assistant to do them.  We have a Zoom meeting tonight and believe me, I'm bringing this up.  I'm also going to bring up the $$ I'm spending on toner and paper to do all this paperwork.  I need to be reimbursed for all that.  Rant over.

Tweety-I am hitting the carbs hard these days.  Baking is therapeutic to me, and it's a love I share with my sisters and daughter.  We're all trying each other's recipes and maybe competing just a little, 😂.  I will have to go back on low carb once things normalize a bit.  I'm glad you are working some, and I think it's a good idea to distance yourself from the negativity at work.  I have been baking with sourdough.  The starter is really easy to make and maintain.

Joe-I hope today has been calm and productive for you.

Ted-I hope the next couple of nights go smoothly.  I agree; I'd be more nervous of the "unknowns" than of the known positive patients.

J22-I'm glad you take some time off today.  You need to step away and recharge a bit.  Sorry the weather isn't cooperating.  Finding a good movie sounds wonderful to me.

Hope all have a good rest of the day!

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1030 

Finishing the last of the morning coffee.  Missing my grandkids. 

It's sunny today after a number of consecutive days of rain or sleet.  It is projected to get to the mid 40s by 1800 so I plan to get some outside chores done. The winter dog yard needs cleaning.

I'm trying to find patience.  I'm falling short.  I'm feeling very impatient with arrogant ignorance and animus. 

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It is getting warmer every day here. Soon we will have doors open in the daytime. 

No plans to go anywhere soon. My daughter and I plan to plant flowers today. I usually plant tomatoes, peppers, and cilantro in February. If the nursery doesn't open I think I'll order plants and seeds on line.

I was pregnant with my son the first Earth Day.

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Awww, last night was THE worst. Nannie trying to go upstairs, repeatedly; left out the back door twice, once she very nearly tumbled onto her face but somehow regained her footing. She was swinging her 30 lb purse at hubby, and had he not stepped back and lifted his foot to deflect the blow, she would have hit him in his really-bad knee (as opposed to, ya, you know) and she tried more than a few times to punch him. He tried to get her purse away from her and she kept screaming, "DON'T YOU TOUCH ME!" over and over. She got mad at hubby for saying he was NOT her husband, he is her SON. She cussed him out for being a %%^)%$ liar. He told her if he was her husband he'd have divorced her a long time ago: "I saw how you treated my daddy; I don't know why he put up with it.""  Later, she refused to go to bed, so we just let her sit up, and at 10:15 PM she said, "Have we decided who is sleeping where tonight?" I pointed to her bedroom door and said, "You go in there." She did not want or need any help, she sneered. So we let her take care of herself and she did just fine.

This morning you could tell by the look on her face she wondered what kind of reception she'd get, and she started getting attitude-ugly right away. Of course she denied everything, or conveniently didn't remember. There is her dementia-confused side, and her pretended innocence royal-byotch side. She began to argue again, and hubby said, "I had enough of this last night!" and he walked out to the back yard. She shut her eyes and played possum alllll afternoon. Around 1/2 hour ago she started to try to be nice, but talking in that annoying, barely audible baby voice, holding the side of her hand/fingers in front of her mouth. Then got mad because we couldn't hear her. She is starting again to try to get an argument going again now. She'll ask a question and then argue the answer she gets. Hubby told her to quit asking questions she seems to already know the answer to.

There is, yes there is.... hope in our lifetime....A man hubby knows from her church, who knows how much worse Nannie is getting, he has a link to a nsg home or two, somehow, and will give one of the women hubby's phone # so he can talk with her about the possibility of getting Nannie a bed. SOON, I hope! The PCP said that the 'homes' have so many Medicare beds (not Medicaid) that Medicare and the supplement will pay for. Not sure of how long she has coverage like that, but maybe long enough to get her financial situation squared away, maybe get her on Medicaid? I dunno. Hubby said we have to think up a ruse to get her there... where-ever 'there' will end up being. She will throw one, screaming, fighting fit when it dawns on her what's happening.

Anyway, boy-howdy, here's your hat, Nannie; don't let the door hit you on your way out!  Folks, ALL prayers for this situation are greatly appreciated! This may not be Covid related, but our sanity is on the line.

I'm going to get an oximeter tomorrow for hubby!  (if I can find one!)

Six o'clock and all is (temporarily) "Q". 

PS: Anybody notice there is barely ANY mention in papers that it is Earth Day? And, don't forget to go out to see the meteor showers tonight... I think toward the East, and supposedly better viewing in the early AM hours...

Edited by No Stars In My Eyes

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Gosh, NSIME, I am so worried for your and hubby's safety. I am so hoping that placement can happen soon!

Is there any way that hubby could not try to reorient her? She obviously is out of touch with reality and arguing with her likely feels threatening to her, not helping. Perhaps you could create a scripted reply to change the narrative. You know how when she asked where are we sleeping?, you said "there" and it was simple and effective. Dementia takes away the ability to reason, so don't try to reason with her. When she tries to leave, maybe suggest another activity instead. It's time for lunch, time for a nap, change of clothes, organize the giant purse.  When she insists hubby is her husband, maybe ask her about her favorite memory about him or look at a photo album. Can she call someone to talk to? How about hubby calls you (in a separate room) and you pretend to be someone she is fond of. 

Anyway, I am sending virtual hugs and good thoughts. This too shall pass. 

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Stars I pray for you and your husband every night

J22 those are good suggestions 

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NSIME-I hope you can get Nannie placed soon, for everyone's safety.  J22 had some great suggestions.

 

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Mi hermana - always thinking of you and then praying for you when you post like this.

On the remote-est chance, might she have a UTI? Of course, I don't know how you'd get a specimen. Argumentative, she is, but to be suddenly so aggressive suddenly could be UTI even worsening of a chronic/latent one. 

I think the toughest hurdle you face is her eligibility for admission. Personally, I don't think Medicaid is a realistic option for her financial state. Medicare, maybe, if there were some skillable need. Even then it would be limited. 

Don't know how the rules apply for dementias and alzh.

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