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  1. chewychipsahoy

    How to balance nursing school and marriage?

    Be upfront and clear (in a respectful and gentle manner) about the time that you will need to study. And when you have that time, really study. And when you're with him, be all there. Maybe share a Google Calendar to put your school-related schedule on there so he can see exactly how much time away you'll be meeting with other students for group projects, studying, attending lectures, labs, and/or clinical rotations. Start some daily habits of connecting/communicating. Like always kissing him good bye in the morning. Or leaving a note. Or meeting him at the end of the day to just unwind. Or a once a week thing. Or starting a journal where you write a message to him and then leave it in a spot where he can find it and have him write back. Staying connected doesn't mean you're having to be face to face all the time. When it gets really hard later on, remember why you pursued nursing in the first place. This won't mean a lot to you now, but it will later when you want to quit or wonder why in the world you decided to become a nurse. It's your perspective and mindset that matters the most. If you prioritize your marriage and your husband over nursing school, it will show in your actions. And I hope your priority is your husband and your marriage. Jobs and careers come and go. Marriage and relationships are a lifetime.
  2. chewychipsahoy

    Best make up and skin products for oily skin and long shifts

    Oooh, I heard about Milk of Magnesia being a great primer. I must try this! My face always gets shiny after 2 hrs from applying make-up in the morning. If I don't blot my face throughout the day, I look like a shiny mess. Thanks!
  3. chewychipsahoy

    When I graduate I'll be 30

    Hi orangepink~ i agree with you. It really is one chapter of life and I'm enjoying it while it lasts!! Singleness is fun and I know I'll miss it when I'm married.
  4. chewychipsahoy

    Help with Acne

    Hi. The only thing that dramatically cleared up my acne was using Paula's Choice products (specifically the BHA liquid and BP - the lower percentage one). The combination of these two products really cleared up my acne. Use a gentle cleanser beforehand and make sure all of your make-up is removed from the day.
  5. chewychipsahoy

    When I graduate I'll be 30

    Thanks @Wrench Party! (funny username haha) I did join some clubs and I AM very busy now! I am so grateful to be on my way to becoming a nurse. Feel like I was made to do this!
  6. chewychipsahoy

    When I graduate I'll be 30

    Tinker88, thank you for the verse! So helpful... to set my eyes on Jesus and trust him at his word. BTW, a little update. So I'm in my second week of nursing school now - an accelerated paced one with 18 units - and I'm so busy.... I don't really have time to ponder loneliness anymore, haha... I'm adjusting though to the rigorous schedule, new people, new campus, working with people on group projects (grr haha). I think the biggest thing that will help me is just to focus on what I have, be thankful and not complain. Thanks for the reminder everyone.
  7. chewychipsahoy

    When I graduate I'll be 30

    FSUNurse2b, yup, I totally agree... reminds me of a Sheryl Crow song.. "It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you've got."
  8. chewychipsahoy

    When I graduate I'll be 30

    That's true. I'll be 30 anyway! God-willing, I'll be 30 AND a RN! Actually, in my program, we take the NCLEX after 2 years, so I'll be 29 and a RN!:) Thanks for the encouragement, GrnTea. I definitely made my fair share of impulsive mistakes in my early 20s about jumping into bad choices out of fear or anxiety about the future. Will not be doing that if I can help it.
  9. chewychipsahoy

    When I graduate I'll be 30

    whealer, thanks for sharing your thoughts and encouraging words! I hope I'll find that kindred spirit you found in your program. I'm learning that hard lesson of contentment. Another great book is The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment! Wow, it really quieted my soul. BTW, I know that Allnurses is not a spiritual/religious site. I'm a Christian though so what I believe just comes out when I type...
  10. chewychipsahoy

    When I graduate I'll be 30

    Thank you, herring_RN, for even just reaching out and letting me know that is it temporary. I agree, "This too shall pass." :)
  11. chewychipsahoy

    When I graduate I'll be 30

    I'm starting a nursing program this Fall (in one week!) and I think I've been feeling bummed out in this transition time because going back to school means "too busy to date." I'm in my late twenties. I feel lonely sometimes. Yet the reality of marriage also scares me. I need to mature... Recently, my brother started dating now. Sidenote: I realized that as a girl with an older brother, my brother is not really my friend anymore. It's natural. He grows up and gets married and starts his own family. I realized this only recently. It's still sad though that the closeness I wanted is not there between us. I was always the one calling him. He never calls me or hangs out with me. He lives about 30 miles away. Near yet far. Another older friend is going on dates and I even set her up with someone. But that just means she's on her way, probably, to marriage. I'm happy for her. She wants to have her own family. I just feel alone. I don't have any close friends. There are friends I could call up to talk to and they would be there for me, but I just don't have that one friend I can call any time, for any reason, without feeling like I'm burdening her or bothering her. This is really vulnerable to say, but I can't think of someone to ask to be my maid of honor if I got married. Maybe bridesmaids, but maid of honor? Not really. Sometimes I get embarrassed by that and shove the thought away since I'm single and don't have to think about things like that. So I'm going to a new school where I don't know anyone. I met some of them already through orientation. I know, friendships take time. As you get older though, it's just so hard to make real friends. Also, everyone was younger than me. I live at home with my parents, not roommates. They are supportive, but not really, at the same time. They go to work and have their own concerns too. They are also not verbally or demonstratively affectionate, which I can't blame them for. It's just who they are as people. So I don't really hug anyone, like ever. Sometimes my mom. Don't get me wrong, my parents love me. I know that. I know that I have a lot to be thankful for. I just feel sad during this transition time, going back to school in my late 20s, single, facing the prospect of singleness for three years (the length of my program). I know, I'm being so silly! I shouldn't worry about tomorrow. I just feel sad, so much so that my immune system must have declined and I have a cold right now. School and singleness. Marriage is no picnic though. I am aware of that. So that makes me slightly anxious too. I already see how ugly I can be. I want to change. It's hard. "Be patient with yourself. Trust God." That's what I tell myself. If anyone is experiencing loneliness, Elisabeth Elliot's book on loneliness is a helpful read.
  12. chewychipsahoy

    Breaking Up Before "Match Day"

    Okay, first of all, I am very sorry for your recent break-up. I did read everything you wrote... Let me just tell you from my experience the cold, hard facts... your boyfriend ended this relationship with you. He broke up with you. If the guy doesn't want to be with you and can actually verbalize this enough to end the relationship (more than once, in fact), he. does. not. love. you. He does not want to be with you. That HAS to get through to your head. It HURTS. But it's the reality of the situation. Once that reality sets in, you're going to understand that what happened (the break up) is actually a good thing. WHY would you want to be with someone who does not want to be with you? who does not cherish you and love you and would sacrifice for you and wants to physically be with you for the rest of his life? What happened in your relationship is that it was dragged on for far too long. Unfortunately, your heart and mind and life plans have been intermingled with his when there was no guarantee that there was going to be a future together (marriage since he never proposed). Long-distance dating is NOT RECOMMENDED, in my opinion. Unless you had a rock-solid relationship prior to going long-distance where you guys already worked out issues and knew each other like a book and were 100% committed to each other, doing long-distance for the majority of your relationship masks problems and issues that would have surfaced way earlier if you had dated in person. I was in your shoes before where I changed my nursing plans (in my case, I just gave them up) because I was in a serious relationship that later ended. Ultimately, the good news is that I'm in a nursing program now and I believe you will be too. So I'm not too worried about whether you'll pursue nursing or not. I know it's hard, but don't blame him for the choices you made in life. It's not a good habit to get into for any aspect of your life. Wherever you decided to apply, that was your choice. My choice to give up on nursing was influenced by my being in a relationship because I thought that was best decision for our relationship, but it was my decision. The thing about relationships is that both people need to be ready. It sounds like this guy is just NOT ready to settle down. The best thing you can do is let him go. He's the guy. He needs to pursue you. I'm not stuck in the 50s, but that's how guys work. If he has determined in his heart and mind that he wants to be with you, he will make it absolutely sure that that happens. When a guy ends a relationship, it's over. Let him go.
  13. chewychipsahoy

    Wife moving across country for nursing school

    Oh dear... I am sorry to say this, but just based off of the information you gave us, I do not agree with what your wife is doing. Yes, it is incredibly exciting and a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to pursue nursing and go to Yale for it, but to move and be physically separated from your family and then to say that you'll visit at most, once a month, is .... selfish.