I've been where you are...still there sort of. My wife (currently separated) was bipolar and would not stick with treatment.
I abhor divorce, and am someone who will go to extremes to avoid it. But multiple infidelities, irresponsible spending, debts, substance use, theft, and deception (all related to bipolar) take a huge toll on a family.
When the kids got to the point that they couldn't take 'mom' anymore we finally were able to get her to sit down and listen for an evening. She didn't choose to make any real changes...so I'm basically a single parent now..
On the other hand I have some good friends who are married. One of the two is bipolar. She has regularly and faithfully met with and followed the instructions of her psychiatrist. Medication and counseling have worked for her, and you would never know she was bipolar if she didn't discuss it.
Hope your situation works out happily. Happy to listen/talk anytime.