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GrumpyRN

Retired Emergency Nurse Practitioner

Retired ENP. 35+ years of experience. From Scotland.

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  1. GrumpyRN

    Game of Groans

    Me too.
  2. GrumpyRN

    Game of Groans

    My wife got drunk at a party and insisted that she had invented the echo. I said to her, “Listen to yourself,” “self,” “self,” “self.”
  3. GrumpyRN

    Game of Groans

    From 0.10 seconds. Those particular three posts were absolutely tremendous - thank you.
  4. GrumpyRN

    Game of Groans

    Thank you Stars, that is really nice of you. I agree, it seems to be just a few people posting but I too look forward to notifications that someone has posted in this thread.
  5. GrumpyRN

    Game of Groans

    The skeleton has stopped going to the discos, apparently he has nobody to dance with. ETA Just realised the use of "disco" is really showing my age.
  6. GrumpyRN

    Game of Groans

    With all that's going on in the world I thought I would get a massage to calm me down and loosen my aching muscles. At the end of it the young lady asked if I wanted super sex. I told her, "if it's all the same to you can I just have the soup."
  7. GrumpyRN

    Game of Groans

    Reminds me, Never trust Atoms, they make up everything. (That one may be further back in the thread but I'm not going to look. My apologies if I've just stolen it. )
  8. GrumpyRN

    Game of Groans

    Get varifocals guys, so much better. Reading strength is at the bottom of the glasses and seeing strength is at the top and your eyes and vision just automatically move between them. Simples.
  9. GrumpyRN

    Game of Groans

    Hi all, we need a smile, I went into a bar with a newt on my shoulder. Barman asks me what is its name? I told him Tiny. He asked, why is it called Tiny? I replied, because it is my Newt. My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away. A woman walks into a library and asked if they had any books about paranoia. The librarian says "They're right behind you!" What did the pirate say when he turned 80 years old? Aye matey. Have a good day and stay safe.
  10. GrumpyRN

    Game of Groans

    My girlfriend told me to kiss her where it smells funny... So I took her to New Jersey.
  11. GrumpyRN

    Game of Groans

    Some groans about smells; New Teslas don’t come with a new car smell they come with an Elon Musk. What’s green and smells like ham. Kermit the frogs fingers. What is the worst part of milking a cow? The smell of the dairy air. If a clown farted, would it smell funny? What’s red and smells like blue paint? red paint.
  12. GrumpyRN

    Game of Groans

    Well if Gwyneth Paltrow can sell a candle that smells like her vajayjay then I don't see why McDonalds should miss out.
  13. GrumpyRN

    Game of Groans

    Thank you Baloney, that is a belter. (As we say in Scotland)
  14. GrumpyRN

    Game of Groans

    Me neither
  15. GrumpyRN

    Game of Groans

    What is the worst part about being told you have Alzheimer's? It never happens just once.
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