I know this is not a nursing topic, but I was looking for some type of encouragement. Trying to see if anyone out there has been in a similar situation and made it "through the rain".
I am 26. Hubby and I have been together for about 11 years, married for five. We have been through so much together, highschool sweethearts, marine corps (him not me), different states, different homes, a beautiful child who is now four, etc. He left me five months ago.
We got into a fight over something stupid and I told him to leave, we both knew I didn't mean forever, Just to cool things down. He left and called me 1/2 hr. later stating he doesn't love me anymore, and hadn't for two years, yet a month before he left he wrote me a beautiful note in an anniversary card saying how much he loves me and hopes to have many, many more.
He was going to try to work it out stating he just needed some time and space and later he stated he wants a divorce and wanted one A.S.A.P. Seems now he is willing to wait the 18 months that is in our state to get one.
There were no drugs, alcohol,or infidelity. Hubby was a great hubby. I thought I was the perfect wife, I was a stay at home mommy, house was always clean, always a hot meal on the table, made his lunches etc but I now know I wasn't, I was a nag, and controlling, always wanted things my way, but didn't see it till it was too late.
I begged him in the beginning to come home that I would change and he would not hear it. He would say different things all the time its not you, and then it is you and you will never change. I have stopped begging for him to come home, as I know this will push him further.
Lately things have been a little different, no fighting,but no real talking either. He has agreed to pay the mortgage and utilities for a year while I am in school. Christmas came and he ended up spending 9 hours at the house, granted four of those hours he was sleeping, (he came early), but the time together was so nice we talked, not about us, but about everything else, laughed and played, it was a nice time. So nice that I actually stepped outside and thanked God. He even offered me info that things were not going well at work and such.
Since then he calls to talk to our son he give me little comments on how cold he is at work and how work just mandated an extra hour, etc. He is nice but no sign of reconcilation. I pray all the time and am standing for my marriage. I love this man so much, more than words could say.
I took him for granted. I am just looking for hope.
Has anyone gone through a similar situation where hubby or wife came back?
I am sorry if this is too personal, but I would sincerely appreciate your stories. Thank you so much!:kiss :wavey: :kiss