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  1. JB2007

    How soon is too soon

    Thanks everyone for your responses and advice. I think I will go out with him just as friends for now. He seems to be a very nice sweet person. I would not jump into the sack with anyone because I honestly do not need that kind of complication in my life at this time. I think I have made my stand on that clear with him. My children are older as in teenagers and I have no intentions of introducing them to this man yet. They are having a difficult enough time with all of this they do not need to meet every guy that I date. Thanks everyone for your advice I am very new to this and I am just not sure what is acceptable.
  2. JB2007

    How soon is too soon

    Thanks for the replies. You are right my soon to b ex is not mourning. He is all smiling and happy. He had a girlfriend before he told me he did not want me anymore. It does feel very nice because after I kicked him out I thought that nobody would ever want me again.
  3. JB2007

    How soon is too soon

    Ok everyone I have not dated anyone, but my soon to be ex for over 20 years. We split for many reasons, but it was his choice to split. He just did not want me anymore. Stupid man! Well any the reason for my tread is I want someone's opinion about how soon is too soon to jump into the dating game? I was asked out tonight and I really was not expecting it at all. He seems like a very nice man, but I was married for 20 years so I would think that there should be a mourning period or something. However, it is so nice to be asked out and to have someone think I am worth the effort. Please those of you that have been there done that give me your opinion.
  4. JB2007

    Singles club thread

    Ok here it goes. I am a 38 year old who is now a single mother of 2 teenage boys. I recently filed for divorce due to his midlife crisis and mental health issues. Now I find myself alone after over 20 years with one man. Yes people I was the stupid 17 year old girl when I started going out with my soon (Please tell me it will be soon) to be ex-husband. Personally, I am still in the sad lonely and find it very hard to find anything to love about myself stage of the process. I find all of you an inspiration that one day I will be better off without that man in my life. I hope one day to love myself again too.
  5. JB2007

    Break Up... Again!

    I am sorry you had to go through this difficult time. Know that time will help you to heal. In the mean time be kind to yourself and do something extra nice for yourself. You deserve it.
  6. I know just what you mean when you say sometimes you feel like the disease is just an excuse. There are days that I just get so angry and I just think that if he would just care about his family enough he would be able to "be normal". Whatever normal is anyway. I am sorry, but right now I am going through the whole anger stage of dealing with him/the disease. That is all I can seem to do anymore is cry or be ticked off. I also know just what you mean by wanting to fix him. He is broken, so with lots and lots of love he can be fixed. Believe me I have been trying to fix him for more years than I want to think about. I will clarify what I mean by fix. I would not change the core person that my husband is, but I would change the ups and downs and the complete detachment from life that make it miserable to live with him. Sorry about the vent, but I am really tired and sick of dealing with everything right now. I wish you lot of luck.
  7. Celly I am so sorry for what you are going through right now. The way you describ how you husband is acting and how you are feeling sounds a lot like my husband and myself. Sadly, I have no good advice for you right now. We are both seeing a therapist and he is also seeing a psychiatrist who is over seeing his meds. The meds have help some, but not enough in my opinion. I just do not think my husband cares about anything enough to try. I am sad for him, our children and myself. His disease is turning me cold and bitter.That is sad because I use to be a warm and friendly person. I hope that you can find the anwser for you and your family soon. Also, do not let you husband's disease turn you into a person that you no longer recognize. Good luck
  8. Thanks to you all for your kind responses. I am just now getting to get back on line. My computer crashed sone after my 1st post. My husband and I are seeing a therapist now so hopefully things will improve soon. I just wish all of this was not affecting the children in such a negative way. My oldest son is acting out in ways that are not healthy. I have him going in to see a therapist too. I just wish that all of this would go away.
  9. Thanks so much for responding. I think it helps to know that I am not the only one who has thought of running way. Sometimes I am sitting in my car just trying to decide just how far the money that is in the checking account could get me. I wouldn't do that to my children though. I have been dealing with him like this for 16+ years and I think it has finally just exhausted me to the point that I can not take one more thing. It also does not help that both of my children are teens now and I am seeing how badly their father's condition has affected them. I am just kicking myself for not leaving him or forcing him to get help before this.
  10. Have any of you had a husband/wife that has depression/bipolar? My husband has depression, but I am pretty sure it is bipolar. Big family hx of bipolar and he did not tell the doctor about it when he went in for his depression. I really need someone who can share how to cope with all of this right now. I am thinking about a divorce and I really hate the idea. I do not want medical advice just someone who is willing to share. I recently started counseling.
  11. JB2007

    Anyone want to be diet buddies?

    I did fairly well today. Had a bowl of Cheerios with a bannana and 2% milk for breakfast. Then a turkey breast sandwich on whole wheat bread and an apple for lunch. For dinner I had a big salad with cheese and fat free ranch dressing. I am going to have some yogart for dessert later. Sadly I did not make it to the gym. Had to run the children to their practices after I got off of work. No time to do so today, but tomorrow I will be going to workout. I hope that things go well for you today grandmawrinkle. I know the weekends are the worst for me too.
  12. JB2007

    Anyone want to be diet buddies?

    I forgot to add my goal wt is 160. Therefore I have a long, long way to go.
  13. JB2007

    Anyone want to be diet buddies?

    Sorry that I basically joined this group and have not gotten back on. I would imagine it is because I have been having a very bad week. Eating a lot of really bad food and not working out at all. I am just so disappointed in myself that I could cry. However, I will start over next week and it will go better. I am 5 foot 6 inches and 250 lbs. I quit smoking 2 years ago and I have steadly been gaining weight since. I am just going to eat healther food and cut out the junk food. This is going to very difficult since I live in a house full of unsupportive males. Two of which can eat whatever they want and remain underweight. Oh yea, I will add that I am a stress eater. When I am stressed I eat a lot of junk. In these times I want chocolate and lots of it. Is it possible to eat yourself into a chocolate coma because there are times that I think that is my goal. Well best of luck to you all in the upcoming week! I hope we all meet our goals this week.
  14. JB2007

    Anyone want to be diet buddies?

    I would like to join also. I quit smoking by joining an online group so hopefully I can make a positive change in my eating patterns this way too. I have been working out 4 to 5 days a week and not losing wt. due to my poor eating. Maybe with a little bit of accountablity I will be able to take the wt off.
  15. To begin with try not to stress too much. Your son will pick up on this and that will increase his stress level. I know easier said than done. Your son is young and I think that will make the move a lot easier for him. I am sure that he will be fine. I would see how he does in the first few weeks, but if you see him to continue to struggle with his studies I would check with his teacher. She/he should have some suggestions that could help your son. The teacher may even have a list of tutors that you could take your son to help him with his math. As far as his grades go, that may come with time. Like the OP stated boys develop slower and each child learns at their own pace. I have two boys, one had straight A's and B's so far and the other was lucky to get anything higher than a D on his report card. He hated school from day one. His Freshman year he made all A's and B's. He just made up his mind he wanted to go to college and he knows he has to make the grades. Just take it one day at a time. Keep a good line of communication open at the school and with you child.

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