This reminds me of a segment I saw on Oprah in which she discussed the phenomenon that people who had had bariatric surgery were now reverting into alcoholism and drug use, where before those behaviors had never been a problem. I'll take Oprah with a grain of salt -- but she IS the poster child for disordered eating in this country, and she sure does have a lot of issues in her personal life.
I also agree that we should not enable obesity, but what bothers me is to see people who cannot find a way to do that positive action without falling into the trap of simply dismissing the obese as nothing more than a drag on society who should be shamed into losing weight.
I think leslie, that you are an example of someone who can love a person, see a problem and address that problem in a non-judgemental way, and so still find that balance between not accepting the behavior but accepting the person.
We should all aspire to follow that example.
I am not usually overweight but when I quit smoking two years ago I gained 15 pounds, and I am still struggling to lose that weight. So I guess I get a pat on the back for quitting smoking, and then a slap on the wrist for being overweight.
But I can certainly see how difficult it is to lose weight. I quit smoking because I had reached a point of such self-loathing that I just couldn't go on anymore. The thing is, I can remove cigarrettes from my life, but as many have pointed out, it's pretty hard to get rid of the food.
Also, I have always been very health conscious in my food choices and knowledgable about fat content, portion size, carbs and fiber and protein and calories and the like, but all that doesn't mean anything if I'm eating healthy but eating too much food.
And I know that we have come along with a lot of research into obesity, it's causes and types and all, but the problem just gets worse and worse. We still don't even know how to solve anorexia or bulimia. I don't think we've even come close to finding a cause or a solution to this, and I'm starting to think that all this judgement against the obese is actually the biggest issue that is standing in the way of us finding a way to solve this problem.