Jump to content
toomuchbaloney toomuchbaloney (New Member) New Member

Game of Groans

Lounge   (1,944 Views 62 Comments)
2 Followers; 37,019 Visitors; 8,741 Posts
If you find this topic helpful leave a comment.
advertisement

You are reading page 3 of Game of Groans. If you want to start from the beginning Go to First Page.

My bank confuses me. I see lots of words and figures I don't understand and it's got my eyes going in circles and my ears buzzing.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I never faked a sarcasm in my life.

_______________________________________

This is my step-ladder.

I never knew my real ladder.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Two mobile phones met and fell in love. They decided to get married. The ceremony wasn't so great, but the reception was excellent!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Johnny got to school and told his teacher, "I saw a DEAD cat on the way to school!"

Teacher asked, "Johnny, how do you know it was dead"

Johnny replied, "Well, when I pissed on him, he didn't move."

Teacher said, "You PISSED on the cat?"

Johnny said, "Yeah, I leaned over real close to his ear and said, "PSSSST! PSSSST!" and he never moved!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

“I was having dinner with my boss and his wife said, ‘How many potatoes would you like?’. I said ‘Ooh, I’ll just have one please.’ She said ‘It’s OK, you don’t have to be polite.’ ‘Alright,’ I said, ‘I’ll just have one then, you stupid cow.’

“This bloke said to me: ‘I’m going to attack you with the neck of a guitar.’ I said: ‘Is that a fret?'”

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A woman yelled at her friend for touching the outer door handle on her car. The friend told her she wasn't hurting her car, it's not alive. The owner of the car told the other woman that it was new. The friend told the car owner she was NOT hurting the NEW car.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
advertisement

Self-Employed.                                                                                                             I'm not talking to myself, I'm in a staff meeting.

_____________________________________________

Please cancel my subscription to your issues.

______________________________________________

 

Edited by No Stars In My Eyes

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You MATTER.

Unless you multiply yourself by the Speed of Light squared. Then you ENERGY.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Seen on a new-born's onesie:

Glad to be out. I was running out of womb.

_______________________________________

Don't you wish SOME PEOPLE would use glue-sticks instead of lip balm?

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
×