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female nurses, school, divorce and separation ...

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i noticed ... the majority of female nursing students in my cohort are not content in their marriages. whatever their reasons for their failing marriages, is none of my concern.

BUT they ALL chose nursing because:

1) job stability

2) enough pay to become self sufficient

i almost pity their husbands... the day after passing the NCLEX, wife drops the ball and bails.

is this only my class? or is this a common trend?

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Maybe something else is going on in their marriages. Unless, you know what the real story is, no one can assume.

I know for me, I'm not going to bail on anyone just because: I have a stable job and have managed to be self-sufficient. I don't think I can live with myself. There has to be other factors present. Of course no one has actually come up with a magic formula on, making a marriage work. But, many people have claimed though.

Edited by vegas2009

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Maybe something else is going on in their marriages. Unless, you know what the real story is, no one can assume.

I know for me, I'm not going to bail on anyone just because: I have a stable job and have managed to be self-sufficient. I don't think I can live with myself. There has to be other factors present. Of course no one has actually come up with a magic formula on, making a marriage work. But, many people have claimed though.

like i stated in my initial post, i do not know (nor care) their reasons. i am referring to a trend i notice among females in my class. i sit next to (2) females who talk about random penis they've gotten. (1) other female was imported by some "athletic" with a career that went down the crapper. what is common among all 3? "when i finish nursing school, i am gone." maybe it isn't nursing school in general... i forget the divorce rate is 50% of marriED couples whoever/wherever.

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like i stated in my initial post, i do not know (nor care) their reasons. i am referring to a trend i notice among females in my class. i sit next to (2) females who talk about random penis they've gotten. (1) other female was imported by some "athletic" with a career that went down the crapper. what is common among all 3? "when i finish nursing school, i am gone." maybe it isn't nursing school in general... i forget the divorce rate is 50% of marriED couples whoever/wherever.

*** Yes! Sounds like normal, average female nursing students to me. Are you suprised? The might want to wait until the y actually secure that first job rather than dump their being-taken-advantage-of husbands as soon as they pass NCLEX.

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I have seen many students go through school and after graduation get divorced. The ones who shared with me about this (we were close enough to discuss this) all said that they had crummy marriages with an abusive spouse. Most were not physically abusive. They were verbally and emotionally abusive. Before going to school they did not realize how sick the relationship was.After gaining some self confidence back by completing their nursing programs they realized they did not have to put up with the abuse.

Some of them were struggling to create a new life for their children with no financial assistance from the sperm donor. They were happier worrying about how to financially keep things together rather than be in an abusive relationship.

Unless you are close friends with someone you will never have a clue about what their burden is. Better not to bother judging.

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I have seen many students go through school and after graduation get divorced. The ones who shared with me about this (we were close enough to discuss this) all said that they had crummy marriages with an abusive spouse. Most were not physically abusive. They were verbally and emotionally abusive. Before going to school they did not realize how sick the relationship was.After gaining some self confidence back by completing their nursing programs they realized they did not have to put up with the abuse.

Some of them were struggling to create a new life for their children with no financial assistance from the sperm donor. They were happier worrying about how to financially keep things together rather than be in an abusive relationship.

Unless you are close friends with someone you will never have a clue about what their burden is. Better not to bother judging.

clearly, there were no signs of this, prior to the marriage...? =).

there are always 2 sides to the story, and the truth falls somewhere in the middle. i try not to associate myself with people who always pull the "victim" card... anyway... things change, people change, blah... i got a final tomorrow.

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clearly, there were no signs of this, prior to the marriage...? =).

there are always 2 sides to the story, and the truth falls somewhere in the middle. i try not to associate myself with people who always pull the "victim" card... anyway... things change, people change, blah... i got a final tomorrow.

As you get older and learn more about victims you will find that in many cases the perp and the victim are almost interchangeable.

As for the women I shared about: I suspect that they fell in love and married during that phase of the relationship. As time passed relationships change. There were good reasons why these women chose to go back to school to become nurses, one of the most difficult collegiate courses for any under grad.

Actually in any situation there are at least 3 sides to a story and sometimes many more. No outsider has a good handle on what is happening in a marriage. Too many people sit in judgement of the parties involved. I basically reported what was shared and that story was common to many of the women.

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There were good reasons why these women chose to go back to school to become nurses, one of the most difficult collegiate courses for any under grad.

*** Do you really believe that? I always considered it among the easier degrees. Seems pretty easy me compaired to what I observed the chemical engineering students were studying.

Actually in any situation there are at least 3 sides to a story and sometimes many more. No outsider has a good handle on what is happening in a marriage. Too many people sit in judgement of the parties involved. I basically reported what was shared and that story was common to many of the women.

*** I Keep trying not to be shocked at how lightly many people, in particular young women, take their marriage vows.

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*** Do you really believe that? I always considered it among the easier degrees. Seems pretty easy me compaired to what I observed the chemical engineering students were studying.

Yes, I do. In order to be a successful nurse nowadays a 4 year degree is a good beginning. The knowledge base is so broad. Not only science but the need for psychology and humanities is much greater than a pure engineering degree. There is an art to nursing as well as a science. many occupations demand difficult schooling. Most are more focused than nursing. The demands of leadership, management and supervision are much different than many scientific fields.

To me there are other degrees more difficult for me as I have no interest in them. Interest and other intrinsic factors play into how difficult a degree is to obtain.

*** I Keep trying not to be shocked at how lightly many people, in particular young women, take their marriage vows.

I am shocked at many people and their views of marriage. Marriage is a legal, civil contract. Many contracts can be broken in many ways. The sex of the people involved in any contract has little to do with the validity of that contract. To try to push it on one of the people involved is not too fair. If both parties go into the contract with certain expectations it is easy to see why some contracts do not last.

If you are talking about a religious vow in a wedding. That is different. A religious vow is an internalized, ethical commitment. The religious leader is authorized by the state to preform this wedding ceremony as part of the marriage contract that is signed by the participants as well as the religious person performing it.

It is quite common to confuse wedding vows with marriage. One is an ethical, internal decision. The other is a legal contract that is binding until ended. What that contract includes is usually common. There may be pre-nup. or other contracts signed in conjunction with the marriage contract.

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I am shocked at many people and their views of marriage. Marriage is a legal, civil contract. Many contracts can be broken in many ways. The sex of the people involved in any contract has little to do with the validity of that contract. To try to push it on one of the people involved is not too fair. If both parties go into the contract with certain expectations it is easy to see why some contracts do not last.

If you are talking about a religious vow in a wedding. That is different. A religious vow is an internalized, ethical commitment. The religious leader is authorized by the state to preform this wedding ceremony as part of the marriage contract that is signed by the participants as well as the religious person performing it.

It is quite common to confuse wedding vows with marriage. One is an ethical, internal decision. The other is a legal contract that is binding until ended. What that contract includes is usually common. There may be pre-nup. or other contracts signed in conjunction with the marriage contract.

*** We will have to agree to disagree about the difficulty of nursing school. I never felt challenged and found it to be fairly easy. When I observed what some of the other college students had to learn, and their work load I was glad I only had to study nursing.

As for marriage I view it as a promise and a vow. I take both very seriously. I don't make promises I don't intend to keep.

A couple years ago, while working night shift, I over heard a conversation between several young nurses. One, a beautiful young lady had been engaged to a young man for almost a year. Apperently his parents are very wealthy and had promised the couple a 6 month vacation / tour of Europe as a wedding present. I over heard the young nurse say to her friend "Well I can't stand him anymore but no way I am missing that trip!"

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I certainly agree there are people who only look at dollar signs. Congress is a perfect example. There are people of both sexes that seem to take vows lightly. Many see vixens but our culture is more tolerant of wolves than foxes.

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