Daily Diary

Thanks guys. I found Billy on the couch deceased after I posted this morning. I put it up on FB to tell my family and friends that knew him. The support is appreciated. Billy and I usually snuggle when I read and we sleep together, but sometime in the night he always goes to the couch. I saw him there at 2AM when I got up to go to the bathroom and wanted to check if the thermostat was on because it was chilly. He looked up and I petted him. He seemed in zero distress. He ate well and we had a nice long walk the evening before. I'll never know what happened, but hope it happened fast and painless. I'm pretty devastated to say the least. It was way too late to call into work, but a coworker from nights covered me until I could get there. I put him next to my other late dogs Caesar and Ellie. I hated leaving SlowBro but had to go to work and it kept my mind occupied. Yes NSIME, SlowBro I got after Ellie passed to keep Billy company. More than likely in a while I'll get another to keep SlowBro company. Thanks again for your kindness.

It was a photographer from our local NPR station. Not sure when the article will air

Got notified while I was sleeping that my Southwest flight from Baltimore to Providence is cancelled. I am now leaving Louisville at 540a, traveling to Chicago, then to DC, then to Providence. A more direct flight, had me getting into Providence too late for theatre. Looks like I will be traveling half the country, in a day. This is all because of Boeing debacle. I guess it is better than being on a Max 8 that crashes! Was there an NPR reporter doing a piece on furries, Joe, or a local public radio reporter? Do you know when story will air? J is a good neighbor.

Joe - Good that you went furry bowling yesterday evening. If/when a photo was take, please share!!! Hope the whole job situation works in your favor. Lil Nel - Seems like work was not-fun, last night. Weeping IV sites can cause much anxiety, especially if the patient is a hard stick and/or the patient is neurotic. Ugh! Just chillin' here. I look out the window and just shake my head. The snow is NOT a pretty sight. Still, hope it melts SLOOOOOWLY! We've been having major problems with the 2+ mile dirt road which is a major part of our 32+ member (with 32+ property owners and 32+ homes) HOA community. I can't even imagine what this road will look like should all of this snow melt in a short amount of time. Ugh! Where, on earth, is spring?!? Blech! Oh well. . . Al this talk about food has made me hungry! L O L! Hope everyone's weekend is restful and/or uneventful.

I am gathering from various posts that Billy has passed away, Tweety. I am very, very, sorry. Wally and Biggie send big hugs, and some slobber. Heart felt, slobber. Everyone did stay awake. A miracle!!! But work sucked. I had eight patients. Six with dressing changes, and one getting two units of blood. One of my dressing changes takes 30-40 minutes, if you are alone; 20 minutes with two people. The blood transfusion guy has stage 4 bladder cancer, and is HIGHLY neurotic. Nothing with him is easy. More than half way through second bag of blood, his IV starts weeping blood; not infiltrated, but weeping. Probably from blood thinners. Loved your musical tribute to your dad, Ted. You are a loving son. Yummy dessert, BC!!!!! I think Tweety should cook for all of us at Ted's house. ☺

Good morning- Tweety-Just read your FB post. I'm so sorry. Woke up to snow this AM. Hopefully the temperature will rise and it won't stick around too long. We went to a Peruvian restaurant for dinner last night. The food was really good and I loved the atmosphere. It's a very busy place and I made reservations over a week ago to ensure we would get in. I fell off the wagon a bit because they had a passionfruit-coconut cheesecake for dessert. I just couldn't say no. I'll be doing my penance at the gym in a little while. Herring-I have that RBG t-shirt. I will wear it to the gym today. J22-how did DH make out at his appointment yesterday? i hope he's ok. Ted-I loved your composition. What a beautiful tribute to your father. NSIME-Glad Nannie fell on a soft surface, and you didn't have to deal with any injuries. Nel-hope your night a work was good. Joe-glad the weight loss is going well. Hi Dianah and Spidey's Mom. Hope all is well with you. Time to get moving. Hope all have a good day.

Good Morning! Herring, the weather there sounds similar to here. Cool to warm with bright sunny skies. Hope things work out for the husband J22. If it's some sort of arterial blow flow thing or even a clot then Aspirin might not be a bad choice. Too bad about the pain hope he gets answers and something that can help. NSIME, sounds like a productive day. Glad Nannie didn't hurt herself. We had a 80 something dementia payment that kept crying for long dead relatives especially her Grammie. So sad. Nel, hope work is kind and people stay awake. It could happen. Ted, such a sweet and loving tribute for your loving father. I had a productive and good day alone yesterday. Cooked some good ethic food Shakshouka, a middle eastern dish we've discussed here before. Instead of eggs, the recipe used chickpeas and polenta. Also made mapo tofu which is a Szechuan dish I believe and very spicy. Didn't sleep all that well. Had a dream with Ted. We were at his an Amy's house and I think it was a post-funeral gathering and was nice. Ted piled his plate very unusually high with food.

Ted, I really liked this. Could hear the two, you and your dad, in it, his spirit soaring, and the two still echoing back and forth. Hugs. Home now. Yay. Too pooped to celebrate. Want to eat, though, so will have to throw something together. Have a good evening!

Good Afternoon! Been sequestered in my studio these past couple of days. Finally finished that composition that I started last month. It ain't necessarily brilliant. But, it was helpful. Of course it's dedicated to my father. His death didn't necessarily compel me to write this piece. However, the process involved in composing and sequencing (recording) this instrumental helped bring back precious memories of my father. Beside doing the actual composing, I've been sitting in my studio thinking. . . reflecting. . . mourning. . . missing. . . loving. This original composition may not be the most brilliant piece ever written, but it's from the (somewhat self-absorbed) heart. Think I'm going to take a shower now. It's been a couple of days! Much affection to you all. . .

Good Morning! Congrats on the weight loss Joe, keep up the good work. Sorry to hear about the root canal. As I've said, I loathe going to the dentist and dental work. Stayed up a bit a late and slept decently. Woke up and it was a bit chilly and the heat is on, but it's already 60 out and will warm up to 73 so the heat will probably not run much. My weight is stable lately, probably because not giving in to a lot of work temptation (a family member brought lots of chocolates and brownies yesterday), and in fact a little on the lower side of my goal, which is good because my goal is not too ambitious. Off today, so going to do some laundry, exercise and cook. Have a great day.

Morning TGIF Fairly normal day at work yesterday. Hopefully today will be the same. Exercised and did grocery shopping yesterday Talked to J, he needs another root canal, not happy about that but at least the appointment isn't until after he comes back from California. J's elderly friend is having great difficulty with lower extremity edema, he's not sure if she's notified the doctor so he's going to do so. Hopefully she just needs an increase in diuretics and doesn't need to be admitted Did not weight myself last week, so it was nice to see that my weight loss has continued, though at a slower pace. Hopefully I'll be at my goal before the summer Should be a fairly ordinary weekend for me, which will be nice given how busy last weekend was Weather is a bit cooler today, but the rain has stopped

Good evening! I still collect books instead of Kindle them for some reason. Maybe when I downsize. I use my Kindle to watch TV shows in the kitchen. I could do without a smartphone, but I can't imagine life without it now. Ted, always good to hear from you. Work was work. I had four patients, discharged one and got on ER admissions and was in charge. Busy day. Off tomorrow. Our acting CEO whom apparently is CEO of a chain of our hospitals came by and asked me how I liked bedside shift report. I honestly told him I liked it but told him what I didn't like. He said "evidence shows patients like it". He was no more interested in what I had to say that if I were talking about nuclear physics. I nearly snapped "evidence shows low RN to patient ratios......." but decided to keep my job today.

Yes the one that was supposed to be on Monday is going to be rescheuled for Tuesday instead

Hullo, Decent day at work, busy, but not crazy. Weather is still sunny but rain moves in tomorrow. We grilled steaks and fresh asparagus last night. Thank you Ted, for sharing a little piece of your dad with us. Nice to read that you are taking bereavement leave. Best wished to step mom, Herring. I do like those strawberries. I too, loathe talking on the phone, but that is about 50% of my job. Sigh. Webinar starting soon, ta j22

I won't see step-Mom until her birthday on Monday. I am sending her those big chocolate dipped strawberries to share on Sunday. I've sent the to her for two previous birthdays when she lived in the resort like complex. I posted about a wonderful gift my Daddy gave me a few years ago. Here it is: https://allnurses-breakroom.com/monday-october-t150177/?do=findComment&comment=1445202 Sorry. I made a technical error. Click the link or arrow to read the post.

Good Afternoon - Just chillin'. . . I'm on Bereavement time, which is nice and much-needed. Yesterday and today was all about contacting family, friends and churches with regards to the funeral arrangements (date, time & place, etc.). Just re-connected with one cousin whom I haven't talked to in decades. She's older than me and, apparently, took care of me when I was a baby. (It was weird typing that, by the way! L O L!) It was a great conversation. We spent close to 1 1/2 hours talking and catching each other up on life, the universe and everything. My plans for the rest of the day is to work on, and hopefully finish, this one instrumental composition that I started last month. Otherwise, I fluctuate between being sad to being numb. I'll be back later to read and respond to posts. Thank you for allowing me to vent, and write, and process thoughts and feelings. Peace to you all. . . Ted

Good morning- Had a very busy day yesterday, but still managed to get out only 20 minutes late. Tonight will be another story. We have too many patients booked for allergy shots at the end of the day, plus today's shot giver is notoriously slow, which means we will all stay late. We really need to put limits on this scheduling. There's a reason why they are only supposed to book 4 patients for the last time slot. Done venting and complaining. We are supposed to get a Nor'easter tonight. Fortunately, temps are above freezing so it should just be rain, but there's supposed to be very high winds. Lucy the rabbit will be back in the basement. Joe-I hope you don't take it personally that people don't return calls. Still, it must be frustrating. I absolutely hate talking on the phone, so I would not be good at your job. Do you have any more interviews scheduled? Hi Nel-More rain...just what you don't need. Enjoy your time with your friend today. Herring-Hope step-mom is feeling better and her appetite picks up. Ted-How are you doing? Please know we all continue to think of you. Hi to everyone else who stops by. Have a good day.

Morning Pretty good day at work yesterday. That rather nasty reviewer had nice things to say about my recent documentation, so hopefully she won't be a concern for much more. Still have problems with people not responding, we'll have to see if that becomes an issue. As long as it doesn't my urge to leave will decrease a bit. But I'll keep looking, economy may not be as good next year so this year is probably a good time if I want to switch jobs Went out to dinner with J last night. He was fairly late but not as late as he expected to be. Arrived a bit late to choir practice but thankfully didn't miss much Grocery shopping tonight, other than that should be a normal day Weather is starting to turn cooler again, looks like temps will vary a bit but will steadily warm starting sometime next week

I enjoyed the video with Ted's beautiful family and music. Wonderful! I too was blessed to be with my Dad when he died. Took Step-Mom to the doctor yesterday. Her KUB CT with contrast was normal. Dr. " could find no medical reason for her lack of appetite. When asked what flavor drink she wanted step-Mom said, "Whatever." Me, my sister, and caregivers had told the doctor they think she is depressed. She has always been proud to have never been depressed. Yesterday when asked she said, "Probably." MD had her drink an Ensure and eat a meal bar with protein. She told her she would stay until she ate them. She did. She is now on an antidepressant takes at least six weeks to help. A side effect is increased appetite. Monday will be her birthday. Sister is bringing wine to have with lunch and birthday cheesecake, her favorite. She knows she has to eat half her lunch before the wine can be opened. MD agreed with the plan. The head caregiver said, "I'll drink to that!" The party will be with the other ladies who live there. I'm wondering how to get her to have a conversation with one woman. She is over ninety. Type one diabetes took one leg and most of her eyesight. She is friendly, pleasant, and smiles a lot. She has lived in four countries and I find her good to converse with. Step-Mom is polite, but told me," I don't like to be around her because if is too sad that she can't walk and can't see. I guess people feel the same about me having to live in an old folks home." That same woman's granddaughter painted everyone's nails last week. All their hands look better than mine, including Step-Mom's. Oh well. Maybe she will feel better with one class of wine a day, starting on her birthday. If she is better nourished she may feel better before the medication helps.

Good Morning - As you know now, my Dad passed away Tuesday, yesterday, at around 12:40 AM. Dad passed away knowing he was well-loved. Dad passed away knowing that he would be with His Loving Maker in Heaven, a soul-felt belief that he preached throughout his service as an Episcopal Priest. I read your Daily Diary Posts from Tuesday (yesterday), and all of the posts written on Facebook. I read all of the posts. It did comfort. As I shared here recently, I believe that the aging process was cruel to Dad. At least in my mind, that cruelty seemed to extend into his final days of on this Earth. That "Death Rattle" and labored breathing went on for days! I know that most of us have watched this throughout our nursing life. I've never grown used to that sound of the "Death Rattle". Following Hospice instructions, we gave the prescribed dose of morphine and Ativan. The medications seemed to help ease the labored breathing, but that sound persisted. I was with Dad when he drew his last breath. With the exception of Linda and myself, the family had left to go to the hotel(s) and catch some sleep. Dad's loving wife, Linda, sang their favorite country song to Dad. It was a love song, of course, and Linda held Dad and kissed Dad while she sang that song. Dad's wife then went to their bedroom to try to catch a few ZZZZZs. After she left, I went to Dad and kneeled beside him so that I can softly whisper into his ear. By this time, that "Rattle" seemed to be at full-volume. (It was a sound that will reverberate in my head for a very long time.) Leaning into Dad's ear, and while stroking his forehead, I very slowly and very clearly recited the Lord's Prayer. I knew that this prayer was recited to Dad many, many times throughout these past days. Priests and a Bishop recited this prayer. Dad heard other family members recited this prayer to him. But it was his son that whispered one of Dad's favorite prayers into his ear. When I finished the Lord's Prayer, I then whispered several times to Dad that God Loved him. I whispered several times to Dad that I loved him. Then, no longer than two minutes later, that "Rattle" stopped. Oddly enough, Dad was still breathing. Dad's eyes were wide opened after being closed for hours, he seemed to mouth a couple of words, Peace replaced the struggle on his face, and Dad drew his last breath. Now. . . I had NO idea that Dad would pass away almost immediately after I recited the Lord's Prayer. I have to believe that it took hearing his son reciting that prayer for him to finally "let go". I do not know if there is an all-powerful, all-knowing deity that exists in this universe. But, if there is, that God received a Faithful Servant. I did not want to be there as Dad drew his last breath. In fact, my plan was to go to the hotel with Amy and try to catch some ZZZZZs. But "instinct" told me to stay. Reluctantly, but willingly, I stayed. And, I followed that "instinct" to the point of whispering words of Faith and Love. That was all that I did. Gosh, Dad will be missed. . . I thank you all for being kind, and for reading these words. Dad's funeral is Monday. In the meanwhile, I leave you this video that I made for Dad and Linda which showcased Dad's 80th Birthday Party that took place in 2013. It was a rare but well-remembered Big Family Get-together.

Ugh toenails! Spidey just got home from helping a friend with English. They were assigned "Dark Romanticism" that related to the story published in 1890 and the subsequent movie "An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge". He and his friend decided they truly dislike this genre. But they each wrote their essays. I'm sipping wine, watching a rerun of NCIS where Gibbs dad dies (Ralph Waite, who died in real life). I love that show. Hope you all are having a good evening. Thinking about you Ted.

Praying for you and your family Ted, it's very hard losing a parent even when you know it's coming

Ted - I am sorry to read here today of your dad's passing. We are all here for you if you need us. You know that. I am off today and still trying to decide about driving to Washington. Spidey plays in a tournament starting on his brother's birthday on Thursday and I might wait and go on Friday after his last game. Maybe go to Portland, stay with my daughter, then head to Washington on Saturday. (((Dianah)))

Ted: I am so sorry. Prayers for you and family in this difficult time.

Morning Crazy day at work yesterday, had to quickly rework my schedule to make sure something was completed by tomorrow that I thought I had until next week to complete Heard nothing about the interview yesterday until I got an email from the recruiter that due to a family emergency the hiring manager had to delay it until the end of this week. Still waiting to hear when they're going to reschedule it Working a half day today so I can head downtown for that interview. Spoke to that recruiter yesterday, think I'm ready. Hopefully it'll go well, and I'll get an idea if this is something I want to pursue or not Rest of the day was pretty ordinary, the usual exercise and such. Weather is continuing to improve, should be up to 50 today