Jump to content
Poi Dog Poi Dog (New Member) New Member

Are you happy being single?

Relations   (11,582 Views 65 Comments)
18,783 Visitors; 3,541 Posts
If you find this topic helpful leave a comment.
advertisement

Thoughts?

Rants?

:lol2:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Verily, I can say that I am happy being single.

If I had it to do over again, I would have never gotten married the first time. Or the second time. I was 3 months shy of turning 30 the first time I got married, so I wasn't too young and naive.

In retrospect, I can say that I got married the first time out of guilt and peer pressure. The second time I got married, it was because I was on the rebound, I thought she was a magical person, and it seemed like the thing to do.

I am my own best company. Henry David Thoreau said something like, "I've found nothing more companionable than solitude". I even lived in a cabin the Winter of '81, was snowed in for a while, and enjoyed it immensely.

But now and then I do require Female companionship. And Belinda is a near-perfect mate. She's quiet, independent, not needy, and requires just enough of my companionship.

So now, Poi Dog, what are your thoughts?

Dave

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Davey, it doesn't sound to me like you're "single". To me single doesn't mean only "not married" but also without a partner/girlfriend/boyfriend/spouse/significant other.

Sill, it's not for me to decide.

I've been single, by my definition above, and living alone the last four years since my "divorce" (in quotes since gay marriage isn't legal here in FL) and like it for the most part. I'm pretty much at peace and have always been the loner type that needs a lot of solitude. There are times I miss having someone to talk to, bounce ideas off of, travel with and share expenses.

I recently put myself on an online dating service and met one person I went out with a few times, but it didn't work out. That subscription has expired and I haven't renewed yet. I'm available and ready for a relationship, but not putting much effort into it because I like my life just fine. I'm not one of those miserable singles, or someone that has to be in a relationship to feel complete.

Edited by Tweety

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Although I would love to be 'occupied' by a spouse or boyfriend, I am not unhappy with my single status. Some people are so desperate for companionship that they'll endure an unhappy relationship for the sole purpose of telling the world, "I have a partner." However, I'd rather be single than deal with a man who wants to control my life, manage my money, and stalk my movements.

I admit that I am sometimes envious of the happily-married ladies in my age range who got married young (late teens/early 20s), had all of their kids at a young age, live in the suburbs, drive minivans and SUVs to school where they unload the kids, transport children to and from recitals and sporting events, and have interesting husbands who earn good enough money to support the entire family on one income.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can't get used to it. It seems when I have a partner, they end up being my best friend, too.

When there is a break up, I not only lose a romantic partner, I also lose that best friend. So it's like a double whammy.

Does that make any sense?

Before I got married, I was very okay with myself. I don't know if it's just that I'm getting old and nervous I will always be alone or what.

I'm not desperate and wouldn't just hook up with anyone for the sake of having somebody, but I do like having a companion and miss it terribly.

I'm trying to get better with it, but I think it's going to take awhile.

Thank God for my two beautiful children and my friends!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am doing all right being single. I was a serial dater but was I happy? No. I was using people to fill a void in my life. I have realized that that is not the way to do it. Working out, being with good friends, pursuing hobbies, reading, and enjoying my own company are what I am doing to fill that self-imposed void. I hope that made sense.

In my last relationship, I felt lonely even when he was around because he did not like to talk. He was not like that in the beginning. I am a women, we LIKE TO TALK. He would shut down and there were moments I'd be like ***, I am lonely, yet I have this goof here. Something is not right :smokin: I would rather be lonely alone than lonely with someone else. Being lonely with someone sucks a lot more, I think.

I am not saying that I wouldn't like for the planets to align, and the heavens to open, and the angels sing, and I find the one man on this planet that could put up with me, but in the meantime, I am so much happier/satisfied/calm on my own.

Edited by Poi Dog

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
advertisement

I loved being single! It helps that I have a great circle of friends. Also the fact that I was an only child with negligent parents, I was more comfortable alone. For the last 5 years I have been in a very successful and loving relationship. We met through friends and he was also enjoying being single. But we grew to love eachother. I think this is why our relationship is so good. We weren't desperate or even looking for any relationship. We just happened upon eachother. There are times I miss being single but I wouldn't trade this relationship for anything.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Qoute from Dr. Dorian of Scrubs:

"I think one of the most universal human experiences is feeling alone. You’d never know it, but there’s most likely tons of people feeling the exact same way. Maybe because you’re feeling abandoned. Maybe because you realize that you aren’t as self-sufficient as you thought. Maybe because you know you should’ve handled something differently. Or maybe because you aren’t as good as you thought you were. Either way, when you hit that low point, you have a choice. You can either wallow in self-pity…Or you can suck it up. It’s your call."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have to admit that I don't like being single. However, I'm also not desperate for a mate either. I got married at 20 and now going through a divorce. I'm currently in a relationship that is wonderful ! He is my bestfriend. Many people say he is rebound, but time will only tell. I'm now 22, I'm have given myself permission to make mistakes and screw up. The first time around I did, big time !

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't like being single, but....I've also never been married, and I have no kids. I think it would be different if that were the case.

No, I'm 31 and just plain-old-single. My last relationship was 4 years long, and ended almost 4 years ago. I have not dated since him. Got burned, to say the least. Although, I've pretty much been "seeing" him since.....6 months after our breakup. It's a big, complicated mess, and I shouldn't be in it. I'm not strong enough to just walk away.

I wouldn't be opposed to meeting someone new and being in another relationship, I just don't actively seek it out. I don't have the energy.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm happy being single, but I do crave "the other half" because I really enjoy doting on a significant other. I'm not looking to find someone, but I think about it. I see my other friends with husbands/boyfriends/girlfriends/wives as well as small kids and think "good thing I can do whatever I want, whenever I want." Don't get me wrong - I love children and I would enjoy having a partner if I found someone. I haven't found anyone and if it's meant to be then it's meant to be. Until then, I will continue doing what I want, when, and how I want it. :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
×