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A bedside confession

Aging Article   (2,768 Views 4 Comments)
jaelpn jaelpn (New Member) New Member

jaelpn is a LPN.

article_pluralized; 14,501 Visitors; 11 Posts

I was always a late bloomer. The kind of person that never quite caught on until everyone else had already done and seen things in life that I had yet to begin. I just hope that if I am still in my right mind when I die, that I can say that I have no regrets in this life. So how do I begin?

A bedside confession

We are all going to die- each and every one of us. There is no escaping the reality that we are to go through life with trials and tribulations, love and loss and faith and hope. I've come across people in life that just don't seem to care one way or the other where their life is going. I never knew where my life would take me- coming from a small town, I always thought that I would just settle in that town with a mediocre life, not really making much of a difference in life. I went to nursing school to better my life; I strived through school all the while working full time. It wasn't easy but looking back, I know that I made the best decision that I could at that time with the circumstances in my life.

So- if I were on my dying bed and making that one last bedside confession, what would I say? ...I'm sorry that I never got to tell the people that I love the most how much they mean to me. I will not, however, apologize for a life worth living.

Many elderly people have told me that they regret many things... that they wished they could of been a better father, a better mother, and a better friend. How do we know if we can be a better friend if we don't try? Friends are hard to come by- you truly have to feel comfortable being friends and opening your heart to them without feeling like they will somehow back stab you the moment they feel like they can. I would like to say that I am a genuine friend- that I never want to hurt or betray friendship. We all want that type of friend- but over and again I feel that I could be a better friend, a better listener and most importantly, someone that can make a difference in someone's life.

So how do we start? How do we know when we can become better than who we are now? TRY... is that too much to ask? We give up too easily, we feel like we aren't worth the effort of that first foot forward to obtain that optimum sense of completeness.

I know there are many things I regret. However, I'm trying my hardest to make things in life worth living. I've found love, I have grown closer to my mom and siblings. I found hope and strength through my residents when I feel like I can't handle any more stress at work. I watch elderly people and put my feet in their shoes- what are they thinking? Are they happy with their past? What is in their near future.

Now is the time to begin thinking of what my actions will do for my future. Time to make a change- time to stop fretting the small stuff and begin working on me. I know that the only person that can make me smile is the person facing me in the mirror. It begins now- and will never stop unless I am willing to give up on myself. My last bedside confession? I regret not learning soon enough how to take life in stride. It begins now.

LPN; Specialty: Skilled geriatric nursing care

article_pluralized; 14,501 Visitors; 11 Posts

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after caring for hundreds of hospice pts, i have learned that i do not want any regrets when i die...

and am cognizant of what and where i lack.

working with the dying has elevated my consciousness to a whole other level, as these folks have taught me more about living than dying.

wonderful article, jae.

leslie

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People being fallible, life being lived in a fallen world, it's pretty hard to not have any regrets. We just have to do the best we can with the time we have left. Peace.

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