You Are Hired!!!!!

  1. This is an actual job application that a 17 year old boy submitted to
    McDonald's... and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!


    McDonald's Application



    NAME: Fredrick Jameson.

    SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

    DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously,
    whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be
    applying here in the first place.

    DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz
    style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can
    haggle.

    EDUCATION: Yes.

    LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

    SALARY: Less than I'm worth.

    MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and
    post-it notes.

    REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

    HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

    PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

    DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more
    intimate environment.

    MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

    DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP
    TO 50 LBS?: Of what?

    DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do
    you have a car that runs?"

    HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a
    winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.

    DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.

    WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with
    a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the
    greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.


    DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR
    KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.

    SIGN HERE: Aries.

    LOVED this one I got in email today.

    DEB
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  2. 9 Comments

  3. by   karenG
    :roll :roll

    Karen
  4. by   SmilingBluEyes
    definatly would fit a nursing app, too huh? wish i were this clever....lol.
  5. by   cwazycwissyRN
    At least a person would know they were working with a person with a sence of humor.:chuckle
  6. by   Ted
    :chuckle :roll :chuckle

    Very funny!

    Ted
  7. by   jnette
    Sounds exactly like sth. my son Adam would have written... he has no inhibitions and is very to the point. A wierd, "matter of fact" sense of humor and doesn't hesitate to use it in ANY situation...

    always works in his favor, too.. just like this lil' guy !

    Cute.
  8. by   oramar
    he he, in a few years the kid is going to be writing for a sit com
  9. by   H ynnoD
    :chuckle That was Cool!
  10. by   BadBird
    To be so young, funny and witty, sounds like he would be a asset to any employer.
    And for just $5.15/hr, what a bargan!!!
  11. by   JedsMom
    I'd hire him

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