OP, sounds like you need some respite! Try to find someone who isn't nearly as good at taking care of the DH as you are, and perhaps he will be more appreciative.
I can share an anecdote (it's rather pointless, but may be amusing). One of my previous husbands (
) had a horrible MVA six months into our marriage. At first not expected to live, then not expected to walk, then not expected to ever be without pain or a limp. Thankfully, he is now so well recovered that if he has the ankle covered (the ankle got the worst of it--but he smashed everything down the left side and is riddled with plates, screws and possibly still a wire or two), no one who didn't know him then would ever guess that he'd been hurt.
Anyway, he was about 2 or 3 weeks out of the hospital when it's time for his National Guard weekend, and he decides to go. I've been taking care of him to the exclusion of almost everything and everyone else, and I am now worried sick! But, he's gotta do what he's gotta do, right?
We get to the airport, we find his unit, he limps in there on his crutches, and I'm carrying his duffel bag and something else (can't remember, but the sucker was heavy!). The plane is delayed. I wait with him. Finally they are ready to leave, he is the first one called and I'm already feeling a little silent fire within because none
of these guys lifts a finger to help him!
(Here's the good part.) He then stands, balances on his crutches, picks up one bag then the other, and, well-balanced, makes it to the plane with no problem at all. This is the guy who would wake me up nightly
with a gentle tap of the cane on my arm (or whatever) if he wanted little old exhausted me to wake up and get him a drink of water or some ice cream!!
I was so :angryfire. Stayed that way all weekend. When I went to pick him up I was verbally armed for bear. I harranged him about half the way home, when I realized he was looking out the window away from me. Double :angryfire !! I demanded he look at me when I was speaking to him, and when he turned around, he was grinning.
I've learned a lot since then. Can't ID it all, but I've learned a lot.
So, when I say my heart is with you, it really is! Take care!