Why (whether?) the chicken crossed the road....

  1. Why did the chicken cross the road?

    GEORGE W. BUSH
    We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to
    know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is
    either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

    JOHN KERRY
    Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it!

    COLIN POWELL
    Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of
    the chicken crossing the road.

    BILL CLINTON
    I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. Uh, what is your definition
    of chicken?

    AL GORE
    I invented that chicken!

    PAT BUCHANAN
    It crossed the road to steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

    MARTHA STEWART
    No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a
    standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price
    dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

    HANS BLIX
    We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been
    allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

    RALPH NADER
    The chicken's habitat on the other side of the road had been polluted by
    unchecked industrial greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled
    habitation the other side of the road, because it was crushed by the
    wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV"

    RUSH LIMBAUGH
    I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting
    a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet that somebody out there
    is already forming a support group to help chickens with Crossing-The-Road
    Syndrome. Can you believe this?!? How much more of this can real
    Americans take? Chickens crossing the road, paid for by their tax dollars.
    And when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the
    government took from you to build a road for chickens to cross!

    DR SEUSS
    Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the
    chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

    ERNEST HEMINGWAY
    The chicken crossed the road. To die in the rain. Alone.

    MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR
    I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without
    having their motives called into question.

    GRANDPA
    In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody
    told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

    BARBARA WALTERS
    Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the
    chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it
    experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its
    life-long dream of crossing the road.

    JOHN LENNON
    Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together----in
    peace.

    ARISTOTLE
    It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

    KARL MARX
    It was an historic inevitability.

    CAPTAIN KIRK
    To boldly go where no chicken has ever gone before.

    SIGMUND FREUD
    The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road
    reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

    BILL GATES
    I have just witnessed eChicken2004, which will not only cross roads, but
    will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.
    Internet explorer is an integral part of eChicken.

    ALBERT EINSTEIN
    Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the
    chicken?

    THE BIBLE
    And God came down from heaven, and he said unto the chicken, "THOU SHALT
    CROSS THE ROAD." And the chicken didst cross the road, and there was much
    rejoicing.

    COLONEL SANDERS
    Did I miss one?!

    SOUTHERN REDNECK
    To prove to the possum that it can be done.
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  2. 4 Comments

  3. by   gwenith
    I loved the responses to that old one on this site

    http://www.whistlestopper.com/forum/...hlight=chicken
  4. by   jnette
    Those were great !!!

    I especially liked the last three... and Grampa's, of course ! :chuckle
  5. by   Angela Mac
    awesome.......a 5 star rating of course......coming from a chicken farmer-
    Why did the chicken cross the road?
    He heard that a man could lay bricks, and that was something he had to see for himself.
  6. by   Altra
    Good one ...

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