What do you say to a friend who's relative has just committed suicide.

  1. I'm not going into details but, I came across this last night and I just did not know what to say. Have you ever been in this situation? What did you say to them?
  2. 9 Comments

  3. by   itsme
    I dont know what you could say, just let them know you are there to support them, and in a few weeks, when everyone else has gone on with life, be there for them,and let them know you are there. Good luck, and I am sorry to here about your friends relative.
  4. by   Ted
    The most I usually say, at first, is "My Condolences. . ." (Or something similiar)

    Then I listen with ears wide open.

    And hug, if they want one.

  5. by   nowplayingEDRN
    Be supportive, let them know you are sorry for their tragic loss and let them know you have a willing ear and an empty shoulder for them when ever they are in need.
  6. by   SmilingBluEyes
    You earnestly tell them you are sorry and offer to listen/do whatever helps. That's all you can do. Mandy, I am sorry about this sad news. Just be yourself: caring and strong. That is more than enough. This friend is lucky to have you to care.
  7. by   Tweety
    What Deb said.
  8. by   P_RN
    What I say is "I am sorry for your loss."
  9. by   tattooednursie
    Thank you guys so much.. I just now got online and read this, but all that is basically what came through my head to say when I came to work this afternoon. It sure feels good knowing that I said the right thing. Thank you guys.
  10. by   gwenith
    One extra thing to add Mandi - Someone once told me that suicide is the "ultimate selfish act" and what they meant by that was that it leaves those left behind with SO much guilt. Keep this in mind. Guilt is particularly acute for nurses and medical personnel because we have an expectation of ourselves that we could have done more/better.
  11. by   liberalrn
    Also, suicide is the ultimate expression of anger: the BIG EFF U!
    So, the people left behind are feeling anger, guilt, sadness, disbelief and complete lack of closure etc. You can and will see every behavior under the sun (if you are close enough to the sit.). Let them be. No judgement......and expect this to surface and resurface over many, many years.