What do Moms say....

  1. I have been collecting interesting tid bits about what Mom's tell their children and general info on being a Mommy. I would love it if some of you had some stories of when your kids were growing up what you said to them etc..
    Example... One nurse I work with got her daughter off the bottle by cutting the hole bigger and bigger. Her daughter would throw the bottle down and say "bad bobby". She got so frustrated with the flow of milk from the bottle that she FINALLY tried a tippy cup and enjoyed the results
    Being an ER nurse I had no time for little owies... I told my children that I only wanted to know there was a problem if:
    1. They fell down and hurt themselves and a bone was sticking out
    2. They had a temp for 4 consecutive days over 103 and they were taking their tylenol and advil as instructed
    3. They were unconscious for more then 3 mins and it was witnessed by a reliable source
    4. If they cut themselves, they had to have a measurable cup of blood.
    I'll never forget the day I heard my son in the kitchen... "OWIE,OWIE, OWIE" I went to check on him . He had been using an exacto knife while working on a model and had cut his hand. There he was with his hand over the measuring cup. When I came in he said "It's not a cup yet, Mom". Okay, so I tried the home steri strips but the bleeding wouldn't stop. Off to the ER and one tetanus shot and five sutures later he was fine!!!
    Any one out there have any Mommy-isms????
    Thanks
    Last edit by spudflake on Oct 5, '01
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  2. 24 Comments

  3. by   deespoohbear
    I tell my sons that unless they are carrying their heads under their arms, I don't want to hear their complaints. LOL!!
    Also when one of the boys gripes about a rule of some sort, I tell them when they grow up and have their own homes, they can make their own rules.

    Whenever I wanted something as a child, my Mom's response was "people in hell want ice water too."

    Great thread!!
  4. by   tiger
    when we told our mom she was mean she'd say "i can get alot meaner." once we were driving in our truck(before they had multiple seats) and we three kids(all in the seat with my mom and dad) were arguing.we were also pulling the horse trailer behind us heading for a rodeo type thing. my mom had already threatened to pull over and then my dad announced that the next one that laughed would get a spanking. my brother who is 4 yrs older than me and always the instigator of trouble turned to me with two vanilla wafers in his mouth pretending to talk. i began to cry. when my mom questioned me about why i was crying i told her i had to laugh and was going to get a spanking. actually my parents never spanked us. i got two total. one with a fly swatter (couldn't even feel it) for hiding under the table eating all the sugar out of the sugar bowl while everyone waked around calling my name and once from my grandmother with her hand for locking her outside while she was watching me.
  5. by   lpnandloveit1
    whenever one of my kids would ask for something and the answer was no they would ask WHY. The answer was "because I'm a mean terrible mom who never lets you have any fun or buy anything you like." It does stop most arguments
  6. by   canoehead
    My mother told me she could see through walls, and I believed her until I was about seven. Actually I was pretty cautious about her being in the next room until I was at least nine.

    Anytime I disobeyed and got punished, or wanted a rule changed she would inform me that the mother's handbook said thus and such so I couldn't have what I wanted. Apparently babies come out with instruction books that tell what that child needs to do at every age, and what they CAN'T do too. Believed that one too for awhile. She said whenever other kids were bad that "I guess that mother lost her handbook."

    Her best friend backed her up on that handbook thing, and they know I expect a copy with my first child, even if they have to publish themselves.
  7. by   spudflake
    Canoehead - That's exactly what I'm doing I have about 60 pages so far and came to the board to see if others had some input. My daughter is getting older and like you, wants her copy. I told her it's given out at the hospital after the birth of your first child. I had to ammend that by saying the first child born to moms and dads that are married and love each other. I didn't want her to get any ideas that just having a baby would get her the book. NO parent wants kids to read that badly

    I've used the lost handbook on my kids too.

    To get my kids to eat vegetables I use to call them by different names - broccoli was green trees, asparagus was snake heads, guacamole was frog. etc. I would get calls from other Moms after their kids ate with us.."Just what DID you have for dinner tonigh????"

    I've been working on this project on and off for several years and my kids are getting to that age where I better get it done before they get married.

    I love the replies so far but need as many as I can get. Come on all you Moms and Dads - I KNOW you have some interesting tidbits, rules, sayings etc.

    When my kids were little I used to sing to them:
    "Nut butter and jelly
    It fills up your belly
    It tastes nice and yummy
    So good for your tummy.
    This song was sung whenever they asked for a roast beef sandwich!

    Thanks
    Last edit by spudflake on Oct 6, '01
  8. by   donmurray
    I know I'm not a mom (or even a mum) but our kids grew up believing that parents could see a small, glowing, blue spot on their child's forehead whenever the child told a lie. Easy to establish when they are young, and if you are not sure which kid did whatever, the one covering their forehead with their hand loses to the one holding back their hair! It too, lasts till around 7-8 years old, and can get them out of trouble as well as in!
  9. by   Zee_RN
    ....that Mommy kisses are invisible and can NEVER be wiped off. They stay on their faces FOREVER.
  10. by   kaycee
    When we used to pester my mom to buy something we didn't need she would say, we'll get it the second Tuesday of next week.
    If we asked why, her response was always, cause I said so.
    If we got in trouble and couldn't figure out how she found out, she would always say I have spies everywhere. I still don't know how she found out about certain stuff we did.
    One thing I remember her saying quite frequently to my sister and me was, this room is a pig sty.
    Gee I've used that one on my own teenage daughter. There's so many and I do find myself sounding just like her.

  11. by   spudflake
    Donmurray: I love the glowing blue dot - how perfect to catch the culprit
    Zee: Magic mommy kisses that last forever
    Kaycee: You're Mom's a gas. When does that second Tuesday come next week?? I'm sure it took awhile to figure out that no.

    These are great and I love and appreciate the input.

    One of my rules is : Kiwi is the only thing in the refrigerator that is allowed to have hair.

    Anyone have some "good" rules???
  12. by   Jenny P
    Spudflake, my Mom died when I was 8, and one of the few things I remember her saying was, when asked what was for dinner, she'd say "wing wangs for goosey bridles". I have no idea where she learned that as none of her 8 siblings ever used that expression (we were raised by her mother, sister and bro. -in-law).
    When my kids would start in on the "WHY?" whine, I'd say "because I'm the Mommy, that's why." They never could argue with that.
    I had them convinced that I had eyes in the back of my head for the longest time, because I'd catch them misbehaving and they never understood how when I wasn't looking at them.
    One of my friends has 3 daughters, and if one of them got something new and the others didn't (ie: someone grew out of their shoes and the others hadn't yet); she had the best reply to the "why does she get new shoes and I don't?" She'd say "because I love her more" (be careful with it- don't say it if it is true!).
    My son recently asked me why I was always nagging him; so I used the standard favorite: "I love you the most". But my daughter was along and she said "WHAT? What about me!" I just told her "Oh, you're my favorite." (They are 22 and 19 now).
    My husband's Grandmother used to say "Wish in one hand, s#*t in the other and see which fills up first" when he was younger and would be asking or wishing for something (he was raised by her, his 2 Aunts and his divorced mother who had MS and was in a wheelchair).
  13. by   NRSKarenRN
    "I have eyes in the back of my head and ears that can hear a pin drop from years of working night shift." That worked great for years.

    Raucious behavior always got: Don't kill yourselves or get injured. I just got off work and NOT going to the hospital. They usually settle down, at least for 30 seconds.

    Used the cup of blood line too.

    Is it a want or a need?? You get 100% of what you need, and 25% of what you want.

    AM school leaving: Have a great St. John's day (school name) and a kiss leaving the door. Now, having changed to high school name Strath Haven....just doesn't have the same punch and of course NO KISSES permitted by oldest past 2 1/2 years. I slipped up this week and said ST John's as oldest left. To my suprise while off midweek as working this weekend, Got big kiss from oldest on arrival home from school. The magic from that greeting still works! (Still saying to youngest in 8th grade...kisses "not needed".)

    Mommy kisses blown can follow and find the recipient around corners and through closed doors, as they tried to escape me when boys preteens. I'd loudly anounce "Smack" when the kiss reached them. Still brings giggles or darted, amused look.

    Food also named something different. Brocolli = trees, Asparagus =snakes, grapes =edible footballs. Husband HATED potatoes as a kid. His mom told him they were Irish sweetbreads in attempt to get him to eat them. His response: But mom they taste just like potatoes.....guess what he likes the best with his meals: baked potatoes! Husband not fond of vegetables. Established rule for kids they must try a teaspoonful of veggies, husband included---they eat their veggies now. Don't care that Joey covers anything green (except broccolli his love) in mustard.

    Best advice from pediatrician: just put a teaspoon of food on their plate that you are serving: if they don't eat it chill out, they eventually will. If they want alternate, give P+B sandwich. If they want the same thing for 3 months, let em...they will eventually change and no one ever died from eating the same thing. No problems with most foods now.

    Kissed most boo boos, cause mothers kisses have magic healing properties. Then grabed the ice pack/Flavor-ice frozen packet; afterwards cleaned and bandaged cut.

    Thank you for flying Mommy airlines, please buckle up for takeoff.

    Punishment was time out when young. Carrying on in the car, pulled off on the road for a few minutes. Now, it is turning on the radio to oldies station at home and me singing along at top volume with the songs. In the car, put on a jazz station or Kenny G tape oldest HATES. Revenge can be sweet and good behavior quickly resumes!

    I will always love you, even if I don't like your behavior.

    When asked why can't they do something, use different excuses: '"Santa Claus said so" in summer. Easter Bunny in fall etc. Elves seen lurking around outside during summertime checking on behavior while boys alone.....even though no ones believed in 2 years!

    Christmas time, made computer signup sheet and would post on the refigerator with only 6 lines for each kid to write on. Told them Santa had to limit favorite toys so all the kids could get a popular choice, and that he always brought at least three things from the list. (That way we knew what they really wanted and could save for). As they got older, added that toys had a $200.00 limit when husband out on work comp. It was funny to see them add, then delete things they really didn't need to have, or trade off: one son list a lego set (some close to $150.00!!!!) and the other one a Nintendo game. Didn't put up the list begining of December '00 since boys age 12 + 15, boys requested it! Guess it's like me slobering over the Sears Wish book as a kid.

    Let's get the MOM book published: " A Nurses Guide to Motherhood! " LOL.
  14. by   Zee_RN
    Oh, the mention of Santa Claus reminded me of one! This works GREAT for you parents of young kids who ask for EVERYTHING under the sun at Christmas time:

    My kids would have a list a mile long for Christmas. No way we could get them EVERYTHING on the list....but, of course, they believed Santa could... Santa keeps a list of who's been good and who's been bad, right? Well, whenever they did something particularly naughty, I'd simply say..."Well, Santa Claus just took a present out of the bag for you! I hope it wasn't {name some highly desirable gift that I knew I was gonna get them} that he just put back!" Helps to explain why Santa didn't get them EVERYTHING. Tee-hee!

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