Well it didn't work. :(

  1. Don't know weither to be glad or sad. My husband and I two weeks ago put in a bid on a bigger house, but only if we are able to sell our house. Well three months ago I had to change my birth control, for a month I spotted or bled. Well I was suppose to start last week, and it didn't come. So this morning ran to Wal-Mart picked up a pregnancy test and load and behold its positive. Told my husband this evening, and he said what I figured he would. Well withdraw the bid on the house and take ours back off the market. I was very saddened. We have talked about having another one in the next year, but I guess this was just to soon. We wanted to see how we were handling the new house first. Now we really will need a bigger home. I'm just don't know how to feel right now. :wink2: :uhoh21:
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  2. 47 Comments

  3. by   Kinky Slinky RN
    Sorry about losing your dream house. BUT... CONGRATS ON YOUR PREGNANCY!!!!!!!!!!! That's wonderful =)
  4. by   TazziRN
    {{{{Penny}}}}
  5. by   ERNP
    Congratulations?? (I think)

    Now I must admit to a little confusion. Unless you are planning to not work after the pregnancy (which wasn't stated in the OP), what is the difference if you buy the new house? If the income will remain the same, couldn't you do both?
  6. by   Justhere
    No I have to work. But he afraid of babysitting bills which right now we don't have any since I have an 11 year old and a 7 year old, he watches her while I sleep and knows to come wake me if anything goes on. I told him in seven days I only work 3- 12 hour shifts, and never more than 2 in a row. My mom might watch the baby the one day I diffentially need the rest during the week since she is retired now. But I am not sure on that one. Then the weekends I work he is home. We are both worried about getting strapped down with bills, (we had to file bankruptcy several years back due to medical bills and credit card debit) and we are now able to due things again without worrying can we put food on the table if we go to the movies or take the kids on a vacation or buy things we need for the house or kids. My income had doubled since graduating in May from RN school. But he recently had to have a peri rectal abcess opened in outpatient surgery and we are looking at $2000 after insurance pays out of pocket. Then I'll have to have a c-section with this one (have had 2 previous sections and bilateral inguanal hernia repairs). But I am covered under 2 insurances where he wasn't. Maybe I'll get happy after I have a few days for it all to sink in.
  7. by   BabyRN2Be
    (((Penny)))

    Wow, first of all congratulations on your pregnancy! I'm really sorry that you've lost your dream house. Keep in mind that these are major life change, regardless of the fact if this is your 1st or 5th baby.

    Take some time, let this soak into your mind, and think about what you can do, or want to do. Although I don't have kids, I do understand the childcare issues. Is it possible that you could work opposite shifts of your husband so that someone will be home to babysit? I know that he's afraid of babysitting, but I believe that a lot of men say that just to find out that they make excellent baby sitters.

    I know about the roller coaster of house buying... hopefully another house, an even better one!, will open up when both of you and your family will be ready.

    Best of luck with everything!
  8. by   SmilingBluEyes
    Quote from Penny4URthoughts
    Don't know weither to be glad or sad. My husband and I two weeks ago put in a bid on a bigger house, but only if we are able to sell our house. Well three months ago I had to change my birth control, for a month I spotted or bled. Well I was suppose to start last week, and it didn't come. So this morning ran to Wal-Mart picked up a pregnancy test and load and behold its positive. Told my husband this evening, and he said what I figured he would. Well withdraw the bid on the house and take ours back off the market. I was very saddened. We have talked about having another one in the next year, but I guess this was just to soon. We wanted to see how we were handling the new house first. Now we really will need a bigger home. I'm just don't know how to feel right now. :wink2: :uhoh21:

    Things work out they way they do for a reason---sometimes, unknown to us at the time. For some of us, events/situations like this are cosmic... for others, comic...yet others, tragic. Attitude has everything to do with what applies to YOU.

    Take it one day at a time. You will work it all out, somehow, as the months go by.

    I truly am sorry about losing the bigger house. I know you feel thwarted and frustrated. But another opportunity will come along, when the timing is right. Fortunately, babies don't need much space that first year or two, and if need be, you can room the baby in with you while you nurse/feed him or her in the night. So there, really, that solves your problem/need for another bedroom or space. For AT LEAST a year or two, you don't really need another bedroom or bathroom so you CAN make do with the space you have already.

    THEN, while pregnant, you can look for the home of your dreams and shop around at your leisure! Try to make it fun----and take your time.

    Now, I do want to congratulate you on the pregnancy. I know the timing stinks, but when this is said and done, it will likely be seen by you as a blessing and you will embrace this child and the situation, as the months go by.

    One day at a time. You have all the right in the world to feel frustrated, disappointed and angry at this point. Don't deny your true feelings-----feel them, cry, yell, punch pillows, whatever you need. You won't be a bad person to feel angry at this point about the unplanned pregnancy and loss of the home you wanted. But....Eventually, things WILL look up.

    As I look back on all the frustrations and tragic situations in my life, I can honestly say, most all worked out the right way, and there was a reason for most of them. If I have learned anything in my life, it is this: There is very little we can't work around, through, or past to be in a better place, later on, if we are patient and perservere.

    I wish you the best. Take good care of yourself that that wee one to come.

    deb
    Last edit by SmilingBluEyes on Oct 11, '06
  9. by   SmilingBluEyes
    PS: you have two built-in helpers. 11 and 7 are great ages for big siblings.

    Really, give it a few days/weeks. I think things will look brighter as times goes by.
  10. by   Antikigirl
    My hubby and I were in a market for a home to put on our land. We were living in a run down double wide trailer that could fall apart at any time, and had to put the kids in one small bedroom (a boy and girl) with a bunk bed. We really outgrew the trailer, and had to get something bigger or we would go insaine!

    Then, one night in October 5 years ago...my hubby awoke to go to the BR and told me his arm/jaw/chest hurt. After saying I didn't care if he thought it was heartburn or not we were going in...we went into the ER and sure enough...a MI in progress. He was 31!

    All my life flashed before my eyes..all my dreams and hopes trailing on a EKG stream as I watched my hubby's eyes fill with terror (he is a paramedic and was watching the EKG in shock and horror!). It was the most terrifying time in my life! I felt the house slip away, my family slip away, my job slip away, my land slip away...everything gone within one single look of his eyes as we stood motionless and speachless at the motion of the EKG!

    Thankfully, due to the quick action of insisting he go into the ER, he was fine with thromboletic Tx and a stent. But we still live with the fear of another!

    Sooo, this added 4 more years in that horrid trailer, which did stand for the duration till we got our house...which I am proud to say I am currently in! The payments are too high now...so we are barely making it...but we have it, and working hard for it. However...I feel the wait, and the money were a small price to pay for my FAMILY!

    I truely know the meaning of 'I don't care if we live in a car or cardboard box...as long as we are together' means...I learned it 5 years ago as I watched a green electronic stream flash before me with an ST elevation over and over again. Family means everything...even if you have to take time and live simply and well...croweded in...it is a blessing, and somehow with dedication and love...you will get what you wish for to help your family!

    Take the time to enjoy this blessing of a new one...plan well, continue to hope, but keep in mind the reason you want that home...FAMILY.

    Good luck to you!
  11. by   txspadequeenRN
    Baby , all things happen for a reason. I understand the need for a bigger home I have 6 kids in a shoe box. But its good and cozy. My tiny home makes this big family feel real close more times than we would like to admit....lol Congrats on the baby.....





    Quote from Penny4URthoughts
    Don't know weither to be glad or sad. My husband and I two weeks ago put in a bid on a bigger house, but only if we are able to sell our house. Well three months ago I had to change my birth control, for a month I spotted or bled. Well I was suppose to start last week, and it didn't come. So this morning ran to Wal-Mart picked up a pregnancy test and load and behold its positive. Told my husband this evening, and he said what I figured he would. Well withdraw the bid on the house and take ours back off the market. I was very saddened. We have talked about having another one in the next year, but I guess this was just to soon. We wanted to see how we were handling the new house first. Now we really will need a bigger home. I'm just don't know how to feel right now. :wink2: :uhoh21:
  12. by   banditrn
    Penny - after we had #3, I had my tubes tied. Then 13 months later we had #4 - yep, didn't work. Boy, was I upset for awhile, but it didn't last long.

    That last child is a genius, and it's been an amazing ride thru his life.
  13. by   smk1
    maybe you can add on to your current house in a year? Anyway i know what you mean about daycare costing an arm and a leg. My only advice is that if you have extra money right now maybe you can start saving each month toward the cost of daycare to help ease the cost when the time comes.You probably have a about a year to save befor you would need the daycare. Maybe you could save a set amonut of money each month that will go towards that expense. Maybe pick up an extra shift here and there too?
  14. by   SmilingBluEyes
    Thread moved to Breakroom. Take care and good luck, Penny!

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