Hi! Just a quick update. I got my husband to agree - we cancelled the contract on the new house we were to buy and because of my MS and inability to able to go up and down all three levels comfortably, the builder is returning our full deposit.
I also found a nice 1 level home that is great size for all of us and we are going to buy that one and sell the one we're living in now which is way too big - the market is great here so that should ve no problem. Mortgage will be lower - payments easier. My husband will live somewhere - apartment? -and if he gets his act together - goes and gets couseling, to which I told him I'd also go if he'd like, stops dating (oooh, that's a toughy), and decides he wants us without everyone else on the side - then we'll talk about a reconciliation
Last night he said again that he wanted it to work, but this in the face of the fact that he's gone out every night - Tues. Wed & Thursday and then is taking an optional class today and tomorrow from 8am to 6ish pm both days. Not much time for working anything out. I explained that if he said he truly wanted to work it out and took some steps on his own that showed me that he really wanted to work at it, and not just stay the same, I would be more than willing to give it another try. But, with things the same, I just can't go anymore - it's been 15 years and that's way too long - I don't want to be in my 40's and realize I made a huge mistake - hey, I'm almost there already.
So I think it's pretty much a final decision on both our parts. Cancel biggest house, sell big house and move into nice one level house that is very doable for our family (with or without him).
I'm starting fresh and I told him should he choose to try I'm still here, but will not be pining forever so if he wants to get his act togerher, do it. To me procratination is a decision not to do it, at least at this point.
Anyway, just wanted to update you all - thanks for the encouraging words you've sent along the way.