To all with kids...

  1. So, uh, hypothetically speaking, is it normal for a child who has just turned nine to:

    Insist on being naked most of the time.
    Insist on sleeping in his mother's bed (not naked, she puts her foot down on that one).
    Be unable to cut his own meat?

    I hope this doesn't fall under asking for medical advice, as I'm not wondering what specifically the problem might be, if there is one. I'm just worried about the son of a relative. Intellectually he seems pretty normal, but behaviorally... I just don't know enough about kids to know if this is normal.
    Last edit by elizabells on Nov 3, '07
  2. 5 Comments

  3. by   Joe NightingMale
    I don't have kids, but developmentally speaking that really isn't normal...maybe for a kid of 3 or 4, but not 9.

    Has he had any bad experiences recently? Sometimes children regress in response to some sort of trauma.
  4. by   mercyteapot
    Even very young kids usually understand that they must wear clothes in certain situations. For a 9 year old to still be resistant is very unusual. By that point, they've usually developed some modesty, too.

    The bed questions is harder to answer. In this culture, certainly most 9 year olds have been sleeping in their own bed for many years. OTOH, if he's grown up sleeping in his mother's bed, it may be a matter of it being all he knows.

    Is he unable or unwilling to cut his own meat? Has he been given opportunities to master using a knife or does he lack the motor skills to do that?
  5. by   leslie :-D
    insistence on being naked, is usually reserved for 2-4 yo's.

    if he had his way, would he want to sleep naked in his mother's bed?
    you indicated she put her foot down...

    i still cut my children's meat.
    (bad, bad, bad)

  6. by   elizabells
    He IS a lot like a toddler in some ways, in terms of the occasional temper tantrum, whininess, still uses baby talk to get his way. The family situation over there is sort of odd: my auntie has a big old house, so she lives there, along with her two kids, one of whom is 40 and the other 34. The 34yo is the mother of the child in question. I lived there for a while when I first moved to NYC, as did my brother. It can be a bit of an emotional pressure cooker sometimes. And in terms of the kiddo, he really doesn't get a lot of discipline unless he's being obnoxious. So I think a lot of it is just a lack of boundaries and expectations, but it's still worrisome. He just developmentally doesn't seem on track to me. But because he's very smart, any delicate implications I may or may not have made as to possibly getting him evaluated have been dismissed.

    In re any trauma or anything like that: he's kind of always been a naked child. Which is odd, as none of the adults run around naked or anything. He also basically refuses to use the bathroom until he's at the point of having an accident, and sometimes he still doesn't make it. I know the kind of thing that can point to, but I truly, truly don't believe anyone (at least in the family) has done anything wrong to him. I do have some experience in that area, so I feel fairly confident in that assessment.
  7. by   Joe NightingMale
    Quote from elizabells
    But because he's very smart, any delicate implications I may or may not have made as to possibly getting him evaluated have been dismissed.
    That's a shame, because people can be very intelligent and still have developmental delays.