The claws are out... The fur is gonna fly!!!!

  1. I need your 2 cents worth ppl.... I need to know if I should mind my own business, or if anyone else would be upset.....

    OK.. last night hubby and I went to open house for his sons..(great kids..I love em like their my own...please also know they don't live w/ us... they came every othr wknd...but middle boy has moved in w/ us since graduation)...because they are graduating...

    PROBLEM? When I was helping to clean up after party... I noticed their real mom and g'ma going thru the boys' cards ... No prob w/ this...I figured that they were writing down names and what each boy got....So they could send out ty cards later....
    What made my mouth drop to the floor is what they did to the boys... the mother took more than 70% of their grad gift $$$ to pay for "expenses"..(prom tuxes, gradparty, sr pics..ect..!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I know that each boy had well over $400... the one boy got about $200 of his... and the middle boy got $65...(The middle boy is also MD.. but...COME is he gonna learn how to manange money if they don't give him the opportunity????
    With the meager $ he did get last nite.. I sat down w/ him, and we figured out what his " budget" was w/ ty cards, stamps......
    The kid doesn't have hardly $$ to blow!!! IWOULD NEVER TAKE MONEY FROM MY KIDS TO PAY FOR EXPENSES!!! That is like a gift to her from me...

    AM I just making too much of this. or waht??????????
  2. 47 Comments

  3. by   Rustyhammer
    I would go straight for the eyes after pulling her hair out.
  4. by   caroladybelle
    They are evil and you are not making too much out of it.
  5. by   aimeee
    No, that's low, unless the boys had previously agreed that they would be responsible for a portion of those expenses. Even if they had, it should have been up to them to figure out how much they had and hand over their share on their own.
  6. by   karenG
    thats really mean- want me to hold them down while you tear out the hair??

  7. by   gwenith
    Imagine - if you took this before Judge Judy (yeah we get her over here too)
    "Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! You don't take money form your kids - that money was a gift to them - she should have handed the moeny over to the kids and IF she was short of money herself , expalined the situation and asked them if theycould help but it is wrong to take the money first.
  8. by   Spidey's mom
    Yes, a gift is a gift. They had no right to take any money from graduation card/gifts.

    However, Senior Photos are expensive (over $400 for my sons). Announcements were over $100. Letterman's Jacket was over $200. This is all Senior year stuff and that is not all.

    I did ask the boys to contribute a portion of their working money . . they both have had jobs and one sold a steer in 4-H. They also help with insurance.

    But a gift is a gift. I'll help with the hair pulling.

  9. by   FutureNurse2005
    I would have said something! At the very least, have you mentioned this to the father?
    Maybe they did have an agreement of some sort...but maybe not

    It really frosts my butt when I hear about parents taking from their own kids!

    Anyway, I hope that you can speak to someone about it (the kids even?) and get to the bottom of it.

    Good luck
  10. by   nowplayingEDRN
    Bypass the hair and the eyes and just do that karate move that they do so well on TV and in the movies and rip her heart straight out of her chest. After all, she has no need for it, if she can take gift money with out a moments hesitation.

    I have a teenager that is graduating and I realize that there are expenses that go with it. But's one thing if an agreement was made, like Stevie did with her kiddos, but to just take with out asking........How low can a person go???? :angryfire
  11. by   night owl
    Shame, shame, shame on them!
  12. by   CraftyLPN
    :angryfire :angryfire There is no talking to just can't do it... we've put up w/ her s*** for 9 yrs... and she is still doing the "power play" thing....For insatnce...GET THIS!!: When she found out I bacame a nurse.. she proceeded to call me and tell me that she was going to authrize child support to be taken OUT OF MY CHECKS!!!! well needless to say... I won that round...) TMy hubby and her don't do well "talking"..I am the so-called meditor(sp)...and her hubby is too....Now her hubby is great..he's a sweetheart...
    I could tell you so much more's old hx...but you get the picture... "she's right.... no matter what"
    Oh yeah... no, mom decided she would take the $$ before she gave the boys the rest.....there was NO mutual agreement.... the "boy" doesn't know... If we were to tell him, he would go "off" on his mom...Which I don't blame him...but just to keep peace... I am not telling him about this situation....but her.... I am sooooooooooooooooo mad.....I'm seeing red... but then I cry because I can't believe someone would do that to their own children.................................
    Last edit by CraftyLPN on Jun 1, '03
  13. by   gwenith
    She sounds like a "real pice of work". I would say that this is her personality shining through and if Grandma was in on it - well, guess where she gets it. You are right not to tell the kids though it is best to leave them with a good impression of thier Mother even if it misplaced - they will thank you for it and it does create better harmony.
  14. by   hoolahan
    Crafty, that is so sad, to think their own mom would do that to them. I agree w you no telling them. It would only make you look bad, as if trying to deneigrate their mom. But never fear, these kinds of people do eventually get theirs. One day they will be in a nursing home w no one coming to visit them b/c they were so heartless. Children sense that, they know when their parents really love them, and deep down can sense when they are selfish B's who care more about a few bucks than their children's happiness. They will be coming for dinner at your house and bringing you flowers b/c you treated them w love and decency.

    What goes around always comes around IMHO, I've seen it happen a few times in my life now.