Support needed....

  1. Ummed & aaahed about whether to post this.....especially after reading Rebecca & Jon's posts.....suddenly my problems don't seem so significant any more....but could really just use some hugs at the moment, so here goes...

    The bastard finally left! Seems the affair that I had been told about had been going on since April this year, & after not coming home for 2 nights he finally got in touch with me on 18 October & told me, said he loved her more than me & was leaving.

    I was kind of gobsmacked, to say the least. I guess I knew what was happening, but didn't want to admit it. Suddenly it's out in the open, & I have to just get on with my life...

    But do you know the strangest thing? I feel better now - 6 weeks later - than I have for the last few years! My social calendar has never been more full, my boys are happier, I'm happier, and I've lost 8kg (16lb) in 6 weeks!!! Nobody ever tells you about the bonuses, do they??!! And I am more relaxed & happy than I have been in a very long time.

    Have found the perfect apartment - 5 min from work, air cond, pool, round the corner from the best school in Brisbane - & am moving over Christmas. The prick & his GF are buying me out of the house (for an $80,000 cash settlement plus a new car! - think the guilt thing is still going strong??), so everything is falling into place. All my friends are being absolutely supportive, & I've had numerous offers from male friends to go over to his place & rearrange his face!!

    So I think everything is working out for the best. And when I get my money, I plan to take the boys on a round-the-world trip - USA, Canada & UK (where my sister lives). Can't wait!!

    So there you go - that's what's been happening. Thank you to everyone for your support 2 months ago - esp. Vegas, Heather & Renee - even though I don't know you, you mean so much to me. And the most important thing is, I'm back!!!
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  2. 14 Comments

  3. by   OBNURSEHEATHER
    Originally posted by OzNurse69
    But do you know the strangest thing? I feel better now - 6 weeks later - than I have for the last few years! My social calendar has never been more full, my boys are happier, I'm happier, and I've lost 8kg (16lb) in 6 weeks!!! Nobody ever tells you about the bonuses, do they??!! And I am more relaxed & happy than I have been in a very long time.
    Oh dahlin..... that's the way it's supposed to be! Live it, and enjoy it. And don't ever forget how it feels or let another man take it from you.

    Sometimes you're so scared of being alone, that the fear shadows all of the relief and freedom that you'll feel.

    I'm so happy that you're in a better place now. (specifically - HERE!) You've been missed!

    Anything I can ever do for ya.... just let me know. I'm usually here.

    So, take some time to get caught up here.... are you up for sending Christmas cards?

    Heather
  4. by   aus nurse
    Glad you are feeling better Oz. Sounds like you are well rid of the a$$hole.

    When my ex left...going back 8 years now....it was one of the best times of my life, after the initial shock. I lost 20 kg in 4 months and I felt great. Surrounded myself with friends who made me feel good about myself.

    Hugs to you, glad you feel better. It will continue too.
  5. by   OzNurse69
    Heather - Christmas cards... to be honest, hadn't even thought about it.....but add me to your list!!
  6. by   emily_mom
    When I separated from my husband, it was like a 100 lb weight had been lifted from my chest! I hope all continues to go well! You deserve the best!

    Kristy
  7. by   SmilingBluEyes
    I am so happy for you! That you would find yourself and your happiness after so much suffering is truly inspiring. And I celebrate your newfound freedom with you! Good luck to you.
  8. by   Jenny P
    OzNurse, I had wondered where you were and how things were going. I'm so happy that things are looking better for you at this time! Merry Christmas!

    Continue to take care of yourself and your boys; remember you are all precious and HE was the loser. And move on with your life; there are doors opening all over for you now.
  9. by   LasVegasRN
    Oznurse, so glad to see you back!!

    I did a happy dance when I got rid of the luggage in my house. Once you realize how much of yourself you gave up and compromised just for that other person, sometimes you get angry. I spent a year finding "myself" again and it was GLORIOUS!!

    PM me if you'd like to get on the Christmas Card list - I'll need your email address and mailing address.
  10. by   ShandyLynnRN
    I can relate OZ, except for the money part (woo hoo! for ya!!! ). Here's a big cyber hug from me, and I wish you well! Enjoy your kids! It amazed me how much more I enjoy my son when I am not so stressed about my ex!
  11. by   delirium
    Wow, Oz, I can relate. I ended a long term relationship a few months back and I felt better afterwards. Relieved.
    It sounds like everything is working out great for you... Spoil yourself. Have fun. Live.
    Hang out here.
    We love ya.
  12. by   Robin61970
    Glad to see you back and really happy that things are working out for the best.......keep your chin up and DON'T STAY AWAY SO LONG!!!!
  13. by   BadBird
    Oz,

    I am so glad you are happy now. I am glad I read all the replies and that good things happen after a break up, I wonder if that is in my cards too. Enjoy your trip with the boys, sounds like a great adventure awaits you.
  14. by   ptnurse
    So glad to hear that you are feeling better and that things are going so well for you. And have a great time on your triip with your boys. Oh, I also heard a psychologist say the other day on television that 90% of the marriages that start out as an affair fail. You can now sit back and watch them live unhappily ever after.
    Last edit by ptnurse on Dec 4, '02

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