Saturday May 5 2007

  1. Hullo!



    God was over heard talking to St. Francis:

    God: "Frank, you know all about gardens & nature. What in the world is going on down there with those humans? What happened to the dandelions, violets, thistle and stuff I started eons ago? I had a perfect, no-maintenance garden plan. Those plants grow in any type of soil, withstand drought and multiply with abandon. The nectar from the long-lasting blossoms attracted butterflies, honey bees and flocks of songbirds. I expected to see a vast garden of colors by now. But all I see are these green rectangles."

    St. Francis: "It's the tribe that settled there, Lord. The Suburbanites. They started calling your flowers 'weeds' and went to great extent to kill them and replace them with grass."

    God: "Grass? But it's so boring. It's not colorful. It doesn't attract butterflies, birds and bees, only grubs and sod worms. It's temperamental with temperatures. Do these Suburbanites really want all that grass growing there?"

    St. Francis: "Apparently so, Lord. They go to great pains to grow it and keep it green. They begin each spring by fertilizing grass and poisoning any other plant that crops up in the lawn."

    God: "The Suburbanites must be happy that the spring rains and cool weather make grass grow really fast."

    St. Francis: "Apparently not, Lord. As soon as it grows a little, they cut it, sometimes twice a week."

    God: "They cut it? Do they then bail it like hay?"

    St. Francis: "Not exactly Lord. Most of them rake it up & put it in bags."

    God: "They bag it? Why? Is it a cash crop? Do they sell it?"

    St. Francis: "No sir. Just the opposite. They pay to throw it away."

    God: "Now let me get this straight. They fertilize grass so it will grow. And when it does grow, they cut it off and pay to throw it away?"

    St. Francis: "Yes, sir."

    God: "These Suburbanites must be relieved when we slow down the growth of plants. That surely saves them a lot of work."

    St. Francis: "You aren't going to believe this Lord. When the grass stops growing so fast, they drag out hoses and pay more money to water it so they can continue to mow it and pay to get rid of it."

    God: "What nonsense! At least they kept the trees. That was a sheer stroke of genius, if I do say so myself. The trees grow leaves in the spring to provide beauty and shade in the summer. In the autumn they fall to the ground and form a natural blanket to keep moisture in the soil and protect the trees and bushes. It's a natural circle of life."

    St. Francis: "You better sit down, Lord. The Suburbanites have drawn a new circle. As soon as the leaves fall, they rake them into great piles and have them hauled away."

    God: "No! What do they do to protect the shrub and tree roots in the winter and keep the soil moist and loose?"

    St. Francis: "After throwing away your leaves, they go out and buy something they call mulch. They haul it home and spread it around in place of the leaves."

    God: "And where do they get this mulch?"

    St. Francis: "They cut down trees and grind them up."

    God: "Enough! I don't want to think about this anymore. Saint Catherine, you're in charge of the arts. What movie have you scheduled for us tonight?

    St. Catherine: "Dumb and Dumber, Lord. It's a real stupid movie about..."

    God: "Never mind I think I just heard the whole story."
    •  
  2. 52 Comments

  3. by   CHATSDALE
    AIN'T IT THE TRUTH

    lot of money to be made by fixing something that is not broke
  4. by   Liddle Noodnik
    Quote from CHATSDALE
    AIN'T IT THE TRUTH

    lot of money to be made by fixing something that is not broke
    Yep, I can just imagine what my apt complex pays for the labor they get here - I mean, looks nice and neat but there is nothing wrong with "au naturale" -

    How ya doing? Nice to see you here!
    ***********

    From Fridays thread - to Adrien


    Quote from adrienurse
    Hi strangers

    I'm at work. I should be doing paperwork but my brain is empty. I'm due for a coffee break but feet are too sore to get up so I sit here at the desk. The wedding planning has intensified now that we're almost at the one year away mark. We've got an idea now of how much money we have to work with and are trying to pick a venue. There's a fine balance between avaiding paying with money you don't have and planning a wedding with a little bit of sophistication. I'd like to avoid holding the reception in a bingo hall like my sister did. I have fallen in love with a hundred year old restored bank turned ballroom that is so elegant with a dome overhead and great food but it would be crazy to have the reception cost 12 grand like my number crunching today told me it would cost.

    My dad seems to be behaving himself lately and allowing his heart muscle to heal. Hasn't been found in the compost heap with a pitchfork lately. He's still having bradycardia but is seeing his cardiologist soon and had his metoprolol decreased this week.

    12,000??? oh my word - and one year away - mine was 2 months - about 1000. lol -- that place you described sounds ABSOLUTELY AWESOME!

    I wish I knew enough about wedding planning to help you out - try vintage anything-you-can! Have you gone dress shopping yet?
  5. by   adrienurse
    I'm hiring a seamstress to make the dress. I get to take parts I like from dresses in the wedding magazines and fuse them together.
  6. by   dianah
    Adrienne, how exciting! Thanks for filling us in on the plans, I love to hear about ppl's wedding plans/see pix of dress/hear the flowers and venue described, etc etc. Too bad about the budget VS the gorgeous venue. . . maybe something else just as nice will come up. . .

    I'm glad your mom is doing OK.

    Hi Zoe!

    Good morning to all! We just got home from a gospel bluegrass program we helped with. It was a lot of fun, and very relaxed (compared to the jazz program we did on Thurs nite: our final! But it went well!).

    And NOW I want to get to bed. See you later! --- D
  7. by   Liddle Noodnik
    Quote from adrienurse
    I'm hiring a seamstress to make the dress. I get to take parts I like from dresses in the wedding magazines and fuse them together.
    OH way cool! You will have to start describing it as it comes together!

    Quote from dianah

    Hi Zoe! ... We just got home from a gospel bluegrass program we helped with. It was a lot of fun, and very relaxed (compared to the jazz program we did on Thurs nite: our final! But it went well!).

    Hi Dianah! did you catch my question about your bluegrass guys, if you had any nice single men in your troupe? Am willing to travel (HA HA HA HA! only if he's worth it... but don't tell Bethin, she thinks she has dibs!!)
  8. by   Spidey's mom
    It is 11:21 p.m. here in CA.

    Hope you all have a good Saturday.

    We have a t-ball game and then a funeral.

    Dd should be in Vallejo by now - I hope.

    Off to bed myself Dianah.

    Wedding plans . .. . exciting stuff. Love the description of the building - wish it wasn't so expensive.

    Night!

    steph
  9. by   ertravelrn
    Good Morning Everyone......
    Weddings? who needs a wedding.........my husband and I married each other for $10.00 in Colorado........I am still waiting on my wedding.......lol
    I am finishing up my shift at the lovely mdu in the ed.
    Zoe....hey girl, how are ya doing?
    I hope everyone got some much needed sleep.
    Laterz
  10. by   DDRN4me
    Morning everyone!!!
    Up early as usual; I am teaching a class this morning.
    sittin here with my cuppa joe and my pup and allnurses.....ahhh life is good!!

    Adrienurse, good to see you!!!! When is your wedding?
    Tell me about wedding planning i have both of my dds getting married in the next year or so..and you would :spin: if i told you what they are costing. One thing that we were told is that if you have your heart set on a place to go with it and reduce your guest list so that you can afford it. Unfortunately no one told dd#2's fmil that ..we now have about 300 people :uhoh21: coming to the wedding. DD#1 is more sensible ..only about 175
    and friends ask me why I work so much!!!!

    But, it is all good! they are both happy!
    and helping to pay where they can! so, if you need help let me know!

    HI Zoe, loved the poem... Dianah , Steph, Chats; hope you all had a good rest and a great saturday!
    hope everyone to come enjoys the day!! Mary
  11. by   sirI
    good morning







    gotta grab a cuppa



    acls today in another city. see all ya'll later.



    hope you all
  12. by   jnette
    a quick to all !

    trying to sneak in here quick before mutti gets up and i start my morning routine with her. gonna be a long day.. cloudy, rainy, foggy, and drizzly. can't even get outside to enjoy a little. :trout: oh well.


    great news, though... adam emailed and asked if i could pick him up at charlotte airport on june 1st !!!



    my sailor is finally coming home !!!

    told him i'd be there with bells on ! i can hardly wait.




    and here's to all our sailors ... ...who are anxiously waiting to set their feet on solid ground after 8 mos. at sea!

    will stop on the way home that evening and buy him a really good dinner.. i'm sure he'll be down to skin and bones, and he didn't have any meat to spare on those bones as it was.


    well.. i hear mom stirring... this is all the time i have for now.

    (((hugs))) all around !

    Last edit by jnette on May 5, '07
  13. by   muffie
    wow

    hi aid, long time no see

    netters, how is darling mutti ?
    june will come around so quick
    that is extremely exciting !!!!!

    hi to all pre and post muffie posters

    i have a sunny day
    no plans but a great walk this afternoon
    going to enjoy the new spring greenery and early flowers and fresh air


    yall have a great day too

    ttyl
  14. by   jnette
    Quote from muffie
    wow


    i have a sunny day
    *no fair, you suk*


    no plans but a great walk this afternoon
    *no fair, you suk, can i tag along* :d

    going to enjoy the new spring greenery and early flowers and fresh air
    *no fair, you suk* (again)


    yall have a great day too
    *yeh right... in the fog and drizzle* :trout:

    ttyl

    *hmph* !!!

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