poupon mustard

  1. This could only happen to a man...


    >
    >
    > > > This is a true story. If you have children you will probably relate to
    > > this
    > > > father. The names have been eliminated to protect the dignity of the
    > > > father...
    > > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    > > >
    > > > As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection. A thick slab of ham, a fresh
    > bun,
    > > > crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, gourmet mustard.
    > The
    > > > corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried it to the picnic
    > table
    > > > in our backyard, picked it up with both hands but was stopped by my
    wife
    > > > suddenly at my side. "Hold Johnny (our six-week-old son) while I get
    my
    > > > sandwich," she said. I had him balanced between my left elbow and
    > shoulder
    > > > and was reaching again for the ham sandwich when I noticed
    > > > a streak of mustard on my fingers. I love mustard. I had no napkin. I
    > > licked
    > > > it off. It was not mustard. No man ever put a baby down faster. It
    was
    > > the
    > > > first and only time I have sprinted with my tongue protruding. With a
    > > > washcloth in each hand I did the sort of routine shoeshine boys do,
    only
    > I
    > > > did it on my tongue. Later after she stopped crying from laughing so
    > hard
    > > my
    > > > wife said, "Now you know why they call that mustard 'Poupon.'
    > > > When you stop laughing, pass it on!
    > > >
    •  
  2. 6 Comments

  3. by   st4304
    This was just great! LOL!!! Thanks for the laugh!
  4. by   aimeee
    Oh, that reminds me of my first outing after my firstborn. My sister took me to the mall to pick up some baby things that I still needed. I strapped the carrier to my chest and plopped the baby in it and we went busily on our way. After we had been shopping for about half an hour my sister looked at me and her eyes widened with horror. All down the front of me....bright mustard yellow poop....not being able to see over the baby in front of me I hadn't even known it was there or for how long I had been like that!
  5. by   CEN35
    does anybody have any grey poupon!!!!! lmao!!!!!
  6. by   Jenzee
    Oh my gosh!!! haha! I am still laughing!!! That does sound like something that would happen to my hubby!!

    I have a funny story that happened to him last weekend.

    We went to our favorite Mexican place during half time of the Buckeye's game against Wisconsin last weekend, El Vacaros.
    Great place!! After a rather hurried dinner, we wanted to get back for the fourth quarter, my hubby got up to go to the bathroom. My daughter Sidney, starts yelling for her Dad asking the 25 or so people around us, "Where'd Daddy go?". Well to make her hush up I told her Daddy went to the potty. She smiled at me and then started screaming and I mean screaming to the people around her, "Daddy go popo in the potty, yeah". (We are potty training her and say Yeah whenever she goes potty). She screamed it until he came back. Everyone was laughing so hard. My husband was so red!
  7. by   debbyed
  8. by   CATHYW
    Eeeeuuuccckkkk!!
    I'll bet he starts using mayonnaise from now on!

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