My beautiful Jewel (dog) is gone.

  1. Don't know why I'm posting this here other than my heart is hurting, and just wanted to share my feelings. I know it's probably trivial with all the tragedy in the world right now, but my golden retriever has been missing for two days, and tonight I found her body on the side of the highway. We live in the country on a dirt road on about 5 acres, and so she just ran free most of the time - except when she was in "season" then we had a pen for her - which she hated. She never wondered far - other than the neighbors pond once a day. Every now and then, she would wonder off with some wandering neighbor dogs, but always came back in a short time. I knew something bad was wrong when she was missing for these two days, and so I happen to be looking on the rural highway tonight as I was coming home from church, and sure enough. There she lay. I got out with a flashlight, to make sure it was her. I could not see any damage or marks on her, but am pretty sure due to her location that she was hit by a car. She would have been 2 years old in January, and she was the best dog we have ever had. She was wonderful with my kids - very protective and loving. She would not eat if you were out on the porch, because she would rather be loved on than to eat. She gave birth to 12 puppies in September. She was a good mommy. The puppies all have gone to new homes, and I often wonder if we had kept one - that maybe she would not have wondered off.

    I have shed tears - which my husband does not understand.I guess that's why I'm here. My boys who are 4, 7 & 9 are upset, but they aren't as emotional as me - I guess. I loved my dog. Even though she dug holes in my yard and chewed up my flowers, she had the most beautiful brown eyes, and I know she loved me. I keep telling myself if she had been penned up - she would still be here, but she was miserable in her pen, and we didn't spend much time with her because it way quite a ways from the house, so she slept in the porch swing on our front porch - that was 'her' territory.

    Tomorrow I guess I will have to find a way to retrieve her body, and try to bury her. Or at least place her in the woods behind our house - so she's on our land.

    Any way, just needed to talk and get my feelings out. I sat here with tears streaming down my face as I typed this. I will not dwell on this any longer because there are people in the world who wish their only sadness was a dog who had died - I realize that. But I still feel the need to grieve - for a short time.

    Thanks for listening.

    If I knew how to post a picture of her I would.
    Last edit by RN2Bn2006 on Dec 29, '04
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  2. 36 Comments

  3. by   lil' girl
    So sorry about your dog. The are just like a part of the family aren't they?
  4. by   Tweety
    I'm so sorry to hear that. I understand perfectly the grief of loosing a beloved pet, and it's not trivial. My condolences.
  5. by   CarVsTree
    I'm so sorry. It is so hard when we lose our pets.

    You have a right to grieve your dog. You are keeping it in perspective which is healthy, but she was a part of your family.

    She sounds a lot like my goofy yellow lab.
  6. by   dianah
    You'll soon see that a LOT of us on this BB have such lovely family members as yours, and it hurts so much to lose one. Animals give such unconditional love . . . at least she knew how much you loved her, and she was fed and knew she was wanted. For her time here, she had the best time. Go ahead and cry; she was family. Hugs.
  7. by   kitty29
    Any pet lover knows just how you feel, and we all feel for you. One of my best friends, her husband is like yours in that he doesn't allow her morn for the loss of a beloved pet...it makes it all the worse...and I'm sorry your in that same boat.
  8. by   RN2Bn2006
    Quote from dianah
    You'll soon see that a LOT of us on this BB have such lovely family members as yours, and it hurts so much to lose one. Animals give such unconditional love . . . at least she knew how much you loved her, and she was fed and knew she was wanted. For her time here, she had the best time. Go ahead and cry; she was family. Hugs.
    You are so right - she definately gave unconditional love. I just feel so bad because with it being so cold - it had snowed here - that I hadn't spent much time with her this past week. At least I know her last big meal was left-over turkey, so she was happy in that respect.

    Thanks to you all for your kind words. I guess that's why I felt the need to share with ya'll - because in my time here (i'm here alot - just don't post alot) I feel ya'll are very supportive and caring folks.

    Thanks! I'll be better tomorrow. It's just hard because when you walk outside - you expect her to be there. I looked outside probably 50 times today to see if she had come home. Evertime I walk outside - I'll be reminded she's gone. I guess it'll get easier as time goes by.

    Thanks Again
    Last edit by RN2Bn2006 on Dec 29, '04
  9. by   leslie :-D
    as a pet owner and lover, i have had pets that died and took incredibly hard that there were those humans that raised an eyebrow.

    when they say that dog is man's best friend, it is because of the unique, unconditional 1:1 bond developed, nurtured and mutually loved.

    i am so very very sorry...please accept my heartfelt condolences.

    leslie
  10. by   RN2Bn2006
    Quote from kitty29
    Any pet lover knows just how you feel, and we all feel for you. One of my best friends, her husband is like yours in that he doesn't allow her morn for the loss of a beloved pet...it makes it all the worse...and I'm sorry your in that same boat.
    Yeah, I think it does make it worse. I mean my husband is a nice guy, he just never really has any attachments to animals - they are just animals to him. He liked Jewel, and petted her alot, but no real connection. I came from a family of dog lovers, and remember having a dog at all times - and I can remember each one of them clearly. My parents feel as I do. In fact they just had to put their 14 year old dog down due to health reasons, and He has a engraved grave marker on his grave in their back yard.

    My husband was sad to see her gone, but just comes home, and turns on TV and eats, etc..... I just don't have an appetite right now, and just needed to work through my feelings so I can move on. That's why I came here - I can't talk to him about it. He thinks I'm silly. I feel so much better already even though I still cry when I read each of your posts. At least I know ya'll understand the way I feel.

    Thanks for taking the time to reply.

    PB
  11. by   z's playa
    I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. We lost Shammy when we left her in the care of a dog shelter. Unfortunatly it's against the law to sue in Mexico.

    Good thing for them because wow can you imagine the field day a lawyer would have with that case..
  12. by   RN2Bn2006
    Quote from z's playa
    I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. We lost Shammy when we left her in the care of a dog shelter. Unfortunatly it's against the law to sue in Mexico.

    Good thing for them because wow can you imagine the field day a lawyer would have with that case..
    Oh my how AWFUL! You take them to a shelter to CARE and PROTECT your animal while you are away. If it was due to negligence - they DESERVE to be sued ! I am sorry for your loss too! It's just a shame!
  13. by   Wolfpax
    So very sorry her time with you was cut short... I believe in reincarnation and feel that she will come your way again, sounds like you had a special bond with that little free spirit. I empathize with you... I've lost pets to old age but once I lost one unexpectedly.
  14. by   CHATSDALE
    i had a cairn terrier who was about 16 years old...she was an adult dog when we got her so i am not sure of her age...she was a bossy old lady but she found her way into your heart l

    the dog i have now is getting old now [14 next july] she is doing well except for a blinded left eye which she got in a territorial battle with a cat

    i know how you feel...it would be so much better if you had someone there to share your grief but remember we are here for you

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