Loud, Obnoxious sports moms, how to handle?(small vent)

  1. Say, it's been awhile since I did the 'soccermom' bit, but my daughter is now in 6th grade and I recently attended her basketball game. She warned me ahead of time to please not embarrass her and be a loudmouth. I had missed her first game due to work so I guess she had noticed how embarrassing some parents act. I said "no problem, that's not my style dear daughter". I'm the type that likes to be detached and hope everyone can please behave with a little class and decorum.

    Not so. I sat next to Dorthy, mom of the hotshot on the team. I've never liked Dorthy, she is pushy, bossy, and pushy, in addition to being bossy. Did I mention that she rubs me the wrong way? But, being friendly I sat next to her, only to be treated to an unpleasant hour of listening to her yell from the sidelines, ordering the kids around. She's not even a coach. The coach is a very nice, easygoing woman, the mother of my daughters friends. I like her style.

    Why do parents act like this? It's so tasteless, demeaning, and totally lacking in class.
  2. 10 Comments

  3. by   Grace Oz
    It's so tasteless, demeaning, and totally lacking in class.
    There you have it! The very reason those parents act as they do! ...........
    NO class! NO respect for themselves, their child, the other children, the coach, other parents, no-one at all.
    Find another seat next time and try and enjoy watching your daughter play. Wishing her and her team GOOD LUCK!
  4. by   GardenDove
    That's my plan. I was talking to another friend and she told me there is supposedly a rule against parents telling the kids what to do from the sidelines, but it's not enforced. My friend goes through the same thing with the parents of the kids on the the boy version of basketball. She says that the whole scene is ridiculous, but her son has fun. The same with my daughter, she just loves it. She says that Dorthy's daughter is bossy and pushy just like the mom.
  5. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    I would have looked right at her and asked if she's ever considered coaching, then turned my attention back to the game. And either changed seats then, or for the next game.
  6. by   GardenDove
    Thanks, yep I guess I'll be avoiding her from now on.
  7. by   SmilingBluEyes
    I have my kids playing in sports where a code of behavior and ethics is signed and held----signed by both parents and kids. This is much more pleasant.

    Barring that, try to sit as far away from this person as you can and complain to the coaches or people in charge if this distraction affects others' enjoyment of the game, particularly the PLAYERS.
  8. by   CHATSDALE
    i am sure that she is like this whereever she goes, how would you like to a co-worker, in-law of this type of person
    unfortunately they can never see themselves as they really are
    tune out
  9. by   Jolie
    My girls aren't too big into sports yet, so the venue for mothers' bad behavior is the PTO.

    If you haven't yet read this book, do so ASAP! "Queen Bee Moms and Kingpin Dads". It is the follow up to "Queen Bees and Wannabees" and is packed full of strategies for dealing with the idiots we encounter in our childrens' lives.
  10. by   GardenDove
    BlueEyes, I wish they had something like that, but it's not enforced. I'm going to steer clear of Dorthy as much a possible, yet try to stay cordiel.

    Chatsdale, yes, Dorthy has been like this forever, I guess I forgot how obnoxious and full of herself she is.

    Jolie, I wonder if it would be too strong a hint to read that book during the game???

    I talked about it with the girls tonight. I told them that basically being a soccermom was not my strong suit, that the whole scene makes me uncomfortable and sorry if I'm not a great soccermom, but well, I'm a failure as a soccermom. We had a good laugh about it. I told them that I was good at taking them on really cool trips, and building them cool treehouses, and stuff like that. They were cute and they understood. I told them that I'll happily go to their games but that I was thankful that I had a job where I could talk about something other than the things that soccermoms like to talk about.
  11. by   clemmm78
    oh yeah, with three kids, I've been there and done that. I have no idea why people act that way. I would just distance myself as much as possible from them.

    I remember once, one of my kids in some sport, probably basketball or maybe soccer, was on a team that was whipping the other. Some of the parents of the kids on our team were still pushing the kids to try their hardest to score some more. I felt horrible for the kids on the other team so whenever they did something good, a good play or a score, I cheered wildly for them. Luckily, a few other moms felt the same way and did the same.

    Finally, I did tell off the woman beside me about how childish it was to want our team to cream the other even more. Sigh.
  12. by   MLF
    Me, I do get rather loud but try not to be obnoxious. Mainly, I cheer them on and give encouragement. If I get upset about something I try to keep it to myself. (But, I do get upset when a player is goofing off or makes a "dumb" mistake. You can see the difference between a player making an honest mistake and one who doesn't really care about the outcome of the game.) My oldest dd played basket ball and volley ball for 6 years and softball for about 4 years. Couldn't get boys interested enough in sports to really pursue it and youngest dd only just started playing volley ball and basket ball (she is in the 8th grade and says she won't play bb next year-too much work!!) Donna