Living wills etc. ...

  1. Heather got me thinking of funerals and what we'd like to have when the time comes. Then I started thinking about living wills. How many of us have living wills? You know, advanced directives, limited therapies? when my number is called, I've got to answer to it. If there is no chance for me then let me go. If I'm 80 y/o let me go. If I have a car accident today and am in a coma with a chance of survival, then do something, but I don't want to be left like a veggie. It gets alittle complicated. How do the rest of you feel?
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    Joined: Mar '01; Posts: 3,254; Likes: 53


  3. by   Paprikat
    I agree totally with you. I am 30 and if I am brain dead with no chance of living without machines or full recovery, pull the plug. I don't have anything in writing, but have told my family and friends how I feel...
    I don't have anything in writing either, but feel the same way both of you do. I've made both my husband and my mother (who is a nurse) very aware of what I want. And we're all on the same page with it, so I think that makes it easier.

    If I'm terminal, let me go. If there's no chance of a life that even fairly resembles what I had, let me go. But if I'm in a car accident tomorrow, HOOK ME UP! I've got way too much to do yet!

  5. by   aimeee
    I have financial and medical POA's drawn up but no formal advance directives. Most people have the same feelings that have been expressed here. The difficulty comes in deciding how much chance of recovery there is...and where does one draw the line? If you have a 25% chance of partial recovery versus remaining a total vegetable, is that enough? Those are really complicated hard decisions.

    I see many people 80+ years old who still have what I call the wishy washy DNR...the one that says don't resusitate me if I can't come back to a good quality of life. Who can predict that beforehand? Not the paramedics.
  6. by   NurseDennie
    Isn't it funny how many of us nurses don't have an OFFICIAL POA for healthcare, but we've discussed it with our families. No, it's not funny, because we've all seen how ineffective that piece of paper is if the family can't live with it.

    I agree with Aimeee - you can't trust paramedics, docs, nurses, etc to do what you want just based on a piece of paper. My kids, my sisters, my best friend all know exactly what I would want and expect. She has a really good idea of what exactly needs to be done and has the ability and the personality to do it.

    I had the talk with my daughter a few years ago. When I'm 75, I'm DNR. Period. I'll be treated as aggressively as I need to be treated, depending on what's going on. But if my heart stops, then that's it. She cried for a minute and then said "How about 78?" Okay, I can live with that.


  7. by   alwaysthere
    Im having DNR tatooed on my chest in big red letters!

    But seriously folks if something happens to me and they cant get things started up again with good ole fashioned cpr, just let me be!
  8. by   nursegoodguy
    I have a living will and a last will and testament. In it I allow my significant other to do whatever will make him feel best about the situation. If he wants to try to keep me alive, then fine. It's not about me at that time it's about the people I love and what they need to do to feel like they've done as much as possible and I will not stand in their way.
  9. by   Tookie
    Totzally believ in them - havent got one - must do it
  10. by   nursegoodguy
    In my situation if something happens to me guess who gets to decide if I were in some sort of accident... One of my 8 brothers & sisters and not my sig other of 16 years! People really need to think about this especially if they live an alternative life, or there is a "new" hubby or wife, (they get to make decisions and not your kids) And if there is anything you really want your kids to have, and you are remarried and there is no sort of love between the new one and the kids, give whatever it is to them NOW or they might not get it! My sig others mom died first and all he wanted was a drawing that he did when he was in 1st grade... Can anyone guess what happened here? Like I said give it to them now...
  11. by   bandaidexpert
    I am 42 and have instituted everything.....DNR, LW, HC surrogate. My father died very unexpectedly at the age of 62. He had nothing!!! It was very hard on my family. I don't want my daughter to go through the same thing.

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