How to Flame

  1. I'm sure we've all seen these on our BB before. :chuckle


    1. Tell your opponent that the argument is over, because it's degenerated into pointlessness.... doing so at the end of your post giving you the lengthy last word in it.

    2. Predict the imminent death of the Internet.

    3. Call your opponent a Nazi.

    4. Change the subject by pointing out all of your opponent's grammar and spelling mistakes.

    5. Post some horribly vicious and insulting note about your opponent.... several minutes later, post a profuse apology, claiming that you'd intended to send the message privately to a friend.

    6. a: Refer frequently to pretend hordes of lurking supporters, who have mailed you privately to express their agreement and gratitude.... but aren't willing to come out publicly and say anything. (See also here.)

    6b: Accuse your opponent of trying to intimidate your hordes of supporters.... add indignantly that you "will not be silenced".

    7. Attempt to impress/silence your opponent by discussing your professional credentials and experience related to the topic at hand, which clearly make your opinions better and more correct than anyone else's.... be vague about details if your credentials and experience aren't actually all that impressive. (Also known as "dueling resumes".)

    8. Accuse your opponent of being overly sensitive, or suggest in a patronizing tone that they "must be having a bad day".

    9. Claim that an insult or other rudeness was "just a joke", and suggest that your opponent has no sense of humor.

    10. Claim that *everything* is a matter of opinion, that there are no such things as facts or truth.

    11. a: Claim that facts are absolute.... that there's never any such thing as dispute or disagreement about a fact.

    11b: Assume that everything you learned in college, no matter how many years ago nor how much a field has advanced in the meantime, is completely unchanged.

    12. Redefine words to mean whatever you want them to mean. (Also known as the "Humpty Dumpty" defense.)

    13. Refuse to look something up, if challenged to do so.... no need, surely your memory is perfect.

    14. Ask your opponent to supply lengthy and detailed references for their every statement.

    15. Claim that if something works for you/your spouse/your kid/your parent/your best friend/your boss/your hairdresser's first cousin's dog's veterinarian, it will always work for everyone.... and if it doesn't, it's because they're not doing it right.
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  2. 50 Comments

  3. by   KRVRN
  4. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    16. Private messaging the arguement to the person, knowing that message would get banned on a public board.
  5. by   CHATSDALE
    AHA you know my ex-husband don't you...even today 20 yrs post divorce he will call up and say something nasty and then hang up
  6. by   SharonH, RN
    LMAO!!! I haven't seen this in years but it's still funny.
  7. by   elizabells
    From the delightful website tomatonation.com:

    Godwin's Law actually states that "[a]s an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches one." In other words, the longer the discussion, the greater the likelihood that Hitler is going to come up
    For real. But when someone pulls the Hitler card, I get to pull the Jewish card and get indignant that someone would compare whatever discussion is going on to the wholesale slaughter of my people. I occasionally win with that one.
  8. by   Roy Fokker
    Tweety, you're a liberal nazi!















  9. by   elizabells
    17. Bring up a traumatic event from your past that gives you special insight into the discussion at hand. The more discomfiting, the better. Don't worry about it being true, just come up with something!

    guilty.
  10. by   z's playa
    Make sure you show up every now and again and post a question or contraversial topic subject matter...... with no personal info on WHY you want to know.......WHY you have any interest in it..THEN take off and watch the music. NOT EVER bothering to show up and respond to everyone who responded.

    AAAND make sure you do this a-l-o-t.


    Z

    just ran across one..can you tell?
  11. by   KRVRN
    18. Post a response that merely says "never mind, I was going to respond, but won't" ...knowing it's sneaky way of getting the last word.
  12. by   SmilingBluEyes
    Quote from z's playa
    Make sure you show up every now and again and post a question or contraversial topic subject matter...... with no personal info on WHY you want to know.......WHY you have any interest in it..THEN take off and watch the music. NOT EVER bothering to show up and respond to everyone who responded.

    AAAND make sure you do this a-l-o-t.


    Z

    just ran across one..can you tell?
    I call this one "drive-by" posting. And I agree, it happens a lot here.
  13. by   Roy Fokker
    I'm probably guilty of a few "Drive By"'s myself. :imbar
  14. by   barefootlady
    Your post gave me food for thought. I do not think I have flamed anyone here intentionally, but if I am ever offensive, please let me know. I am often too blind to my deeds.

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