Help with Sympathy Card Regarding a Pet

  1. A close friend of mine just recently had her cat put to sleep. He had suffered a bad stroke, and was suffering afterwards.

    She had him for 12 years. He was a very sweet and lovable creature. She never had any children, and this cat was her "baby".

    I've lots pets, i mean, in my family this is the equivalent to losing a member of the family. So it hurt me to know how she's hurting over losing him.

    I could call again, but i also want to send a sympathy card. I'm trying to figure out the best way to express my thoughts, without sounding so matter-of-fact (ex. "He was 12 years old, he lived a great life, etc).

    I'm at a loss here. Any ideas?
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  2. 12 Comments

  3. by   Mandarella
    Hi Marie LPN!

    When my greyhound died, I took my favorite picture of him and framed it with a poem that reminded me of him. It is hanging on the wall above where he used to sleep, in "his" spot.
    I did the same for a friend's pet, she cried and couldn't speak for a minute...I thought I had made a HORRIBLE mistake, but she loved it and said she never recieved anything so special...she still has it hanging and tells me that strangly it brought her some closure.
    It's a really hard thing to deal with when you are so attached to animals, they are truly family.
    My thoughts and prayers are with your friend.
    They do have sympathy cards for pets, usually at all card stores.
    Last edit by Mandarella on Apr 22, '05
  4. by   dianah
    There are lots of cards at our local PetSmart store; I'm just not sure there are sympathy cards.

    How thoughtful of you to think of your friend! We've had two pets die in the last 10 or so years, and each time, a few days afterward, we received a very nice sympathy card from the vet. It meant a lot to us to know someone understood how deeply the passing of our beloved pet affected us.

    Mandarella, I like the idea of a picture. We have a picture of one of our cats just before she died. It is displayed in a rather un-fancy way, on the refrigerator (!), but I can't bring myself to take it down.

    If OP doesn't have a photo, maybe a simple card will do, somewhat like the people-cards one sees: I am thinking of you at this difficult time, yet remembering the joys __________ brought to you. And you to him. He couldn't have had a better home, or have been better loved -- and he knew it.

    Maybe some reference to the Rainbow Bridge would help.

    My heart goes out to your friend. Because you care, I'm sure you'll choose what's right for you to give. -- D
    Last edit by dianah on Apr 22, '05
  5. by   truern
    http://www.omplace.com/omsites/sandt...catcards1.html

    ************************************************** *

    I stood by your bed last night, I came to have a peep.
    I could see that you were crying. You found it hard to sleep.

    I whined to you softly as you brushed away a tear,
    "It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."

    I was close to you at breakfast, I watched you pour the tea,
    You were thinking of the many times your hands reached down to me.

    I was with you at the shops today. Your arms were getting sore.
    I longed to take your parcels, I wish I could do more.

    I was with you at my grave today, You tend it with such care.
    I want to re-assure you, that I'm not lying there.

    I walked with you towards the house, as you fumbled for your key.
    I gently put my paw on you, I smiled and said "It's me."

    You looked so very tired, and sank into a chair.
    I tried so hard to let you know, that I was standing there.

    It's possible for me to be so near you everyday.
    To say to you with certainty, "I never went away."

    You sat there very quietly, then smiled, I think you knew...
    in the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.

    The day is over... I smile and watch you yawning
    and say "Good-night, God bless, I'll see you in the morning."

    And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,
    I'll rush across to greet you and we'll stand, side by side.

    I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see.
    Be patient, live your journey out... then come home to be with me.

    Author unknown
    ************************************************** *
    Four Feet in Heaven

    Your favorite chair is vacant now...
    No eager purrs to greet me.
    No softly padded paws to run
    Ecstatically to meet me.
    No coaxing rubs, no plaintive cry
    Will say it's time for feeding.
    I've put away your bowl, and all
    The things you won't be needing;
    But I will miss you little friend,
    For I could never measure
    The happiness you brought me,
    The comfort and the pleasure.
    And since God put you here to share
    In earthly joy and sorrow;
    I'm sure there'll be a place for you
    In Heaven's bright tomorrow...

    by Alice E. Chase
  6. by   leslie :-D
    Quote from Marie_LPN
    I've lots pets, i mean, in my family this is the equivalent to losing a member of the family. So it hurt me to know how she's hurting over losing him.
    those statements you just wrote would be perfectly appropriate and meaningful, since you obviously can empathize so much. you can get one of those blank cards and tell her you understand and feel her grief....let your heart do the talking. so many of us understand the loss she's feeling. i'm sorry for your friend marie.

    leslie
  7. by   VivaLasViejas
    Oh, dang, look what you've done to me........

    Those are beautiful tributes to our furry friends, truesn.......~sniff~........

    What I was going to say before I started choking up and bawling all over the keyboard, is, most card displays in bigger stores have wonderful sympathy cards for pet owners. I've found them in Target, Hallmark, even Mervyn's. If ever I really need a good cry, I just go look at a few of those and let 'er rip when I get back in the car.
  8. by   dianah
    Well said, all. Thanks Marla, I need to check those sources out.
    Leslie, you said it all: go with your heart.
  9. by   canoehead
    Ok, I'm crying now. Those poems were beautiful.
  10. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    sbic56 sent me this link:



    http://www.petloss.com/poems/maingrp/rainbowb.htm


    (You need a box of Kleenex to read this as well)
  11. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    I figure Hallmark will be the best place to go to find a card, so when the mall opens, that's where i'm headed.

    I'm also going to stop at the local craft store and see if they have a long frame that allows a picture on the top, and a nice poem on the bottom. I have a few pictures of him, and i'll get a copy made of one for the frame. When her other cat died of CHF, she took some of best pictures of him, put them in a multi-picture frame, and put the vet's sympathy card on the corner. She will probably do the same for this cat. I think it helped a lot with her grieving process.

    And also decided to send a thank you card to the vet's office. She raves about how good they were to him, they even call a couple of days later to see how you are after the death of a pet.

    Thank you for all the suggestions, i'll probably sit here for awhile to think of the right way to phrase things, but at least i have an idea of how to get started.
  12. by   SmilingBluEyes
    I got a lovely card and poem "Rainbow Bridge" from my vet last year when I had to put my 14 year old beagle down. Rainbow Bridge never fails to bring tears to my eyes.

    I gave my friend, Kat, a framed enlarged digital picture of her dog, Bear, who died suddenly and young (only 18 mo) of a heart attack of some sort. It was an awesome closeup of his face (he was 1/2 wolf, 1/2 black lab and had those gold eyes). We had spent a few days on the coast last fall and for some odd reason, I happened to take 20 or so pics of bear on the sand and in the water at sunset. They were really nice ones. I printed and gave em all to her, as well as copied them to a disk. She said that meant more to her than she could say. The framed pic is sitting by her bed, now.

    A picture, tastefully framed, of the pet, is a lasting and meaningful tribute too. My kids each have a picture of our departed dog in their rooms. His picture also graces my front hallway table in a really nice brass frame. Having these pics seemed to help them each cope with the horrible sadness of losing a longtime family member. It is incredibly sad and I still have dreams of and miss my dog today.
    Last edit by SmilingBluEyes on Apr 23, '05
  13. by   Mandarella
    You can find more poems at www.in-memory-of-pets.com that where I found a couple of mine.
    Quote from Marie_LPN
    I figure Hallmark will be the best place to go to find a card, so when the mall opens, that's where i'm headed.

    I'm also going to stop at the local craft store and see if they have a long frame that allows a picture on the top, and a nice poem on the bottom. I have a few pictures of him, and i'll get a copy made of one for the frame. When her other cat died of CHF, she took some of best pictures of him, put them in a multi-picture frame, and put the vet's sympathy card on the corner. She will probably do the same for this cat. I think it helped a lot with her grieving process.

    And also decided to send a thank you card to the vet's office. She raves about how good they were to him, they even call a couple of days later to see how you are after the death of a pet.

    Thank you for all the suggestions, i'll probably sit here for awhile to think of the right way to phrase things, but at least i have an idea of how to get started.
  14. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    Ok, cards are depressing. But i found a good one.

    They had quite a few there, but most said on the inside "I'm sorry for the loss of your pet". That seems so "object" to me.

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