Have You Ever Had A Love - Hate Relationship?

  1. have you ever had a love - hate relationship?

    i sure have.............with this entire year, and half of last year! i have hated this past year so much that it won't come to an end soon enough for me.........yet...i love this past year of 2005 for all that i've learned because of all the pain and suffering that attacked my life like a vengeance.

    how has 2005 been to you thus far?

    what other year in your life have you had a "love--hate relationship" with that you'd like to share with us? perhaps others can heal from reading of our own personal journeys with the "year that was" in our past or soon to be past.

    thank you in advance for all your replies. have at it! i'm here to learn, to share, to laugh, and to grow right along with all of you. don't hold back because when you hold back sharing, someone out in cyberland loses out on some much needed teachings and lessons of life. we are our brothers keepers! :kiss
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  2. 33 Comments

  3. by   Fun2, RN, BSN
    I'm not exactly sure if I understood what reply you're wanting.

    However, a love-hate relationship.....my sister!

    I would love to hate her! Right now, she is proving to be the laziest, the-world-owes-me person in the universe! She "WON'T" get a job, she expects my mom to fix her car, giver her gas money, buy her cigarettes, etc. My sister is 34 or 35. ???? She messed up her life, now she is determined to live off my mother for the rest of hers.


    Now, as far as finances, we've had bad years before. This wasn't too good, but we've had worse.


    In 2006, I'm going to work on the few pounds I've gained, save more money, try my best to get along with my sister, and DH and I are venturing out in our biz.


    I'm going to believe that things will only get better. .....Remember, God won't put on you what you can't handle. So, when you think you've had enough, let go, let God. He'll carry you through.
  4. by   VivaLasViejas
    I feel the same way you do about this year, Renee, although for slightly different reasons.

    Not to put too fine a point on it, 2005 basically sucked, as far as my health and general state of well-being are concerned; I'm ending it unemployed and at least temporarily broke, thanks in no small part to my frequent illnesses and my inability to deal with the chronic stresses of a med/surg floor. There were also some losses that have been hard to bear, such as the death of our daughter's ex-boyfriend in Iraq last month, and some disappointments, including seeing my career stymied and my confidence in my nursing abilities shattered.

    But then, this year also brought me one of my greatest blessings: my dear little grandson, Elijah. Not only is he the light of my life, but I've been privileged to watch as his mother has blossomed into the full flower of womanhood.........she is such a great mom, and baby Eli is all the proof I need that God loves us and gives us exactly what we need.

    In addition, 2005 saw my dh and I celebrate 25 years of marriage, and today, we are more in love than ever. What's more, we've realized how much we really mean to each other, and that we have created the family that we always wanted.

    Still, I'm looking forward to the new year, and I'm not sorry to see the old one end. May 2006 bring all of us closer to what we desire in life, and as Tiny Tim once said, "God bless us, every one".
  5. by   leslie :-D
    wow renee, very provocative thread. should be interesting to see the responses.
    i choose not to get into specifics, but my life has literally been shattered since 2004. it started w/my sister getting ca, my mom getting sick and dying within a 4 week period then getting some horrifying memories from my childhood. i am in the process of trying to find another psychiatrist for the one i have just wants to keep me snowed. so i need to find someone that specializes in complex ptsd. so even though i cannot recall a time in my life where my terror and depression have been so prolonged and debilitating, my faith remains unshakeable. my therapist (a gift from God) states that our therapy will take several years. there has been no love/hate-it's been only hate, hating the way i feel. but intellectually i know, i will prevail and heal. i think there is much that God has in store for me; i just have to take this journey in order to reap His rewards. some days i take it one day at a time, and other days it's one hour at a time. perhaps once i find the right psychiatrist, my symptoms will be better managed rather than choosing to live my life stuporously and addicted. the only comfort i get is knowing that God is protecting me from various forms of evil, which is basically the only thing that keeps me going at this point. dh and i have an appt with my therapist so she can explain how complex ptsd presents itself since dh thinks i should be in a hospital. i've thought about it myself but fear just being doped up. i have started looking for resources/links that deal w/my dx and maybe through enough research, there will be that special facility that deals only with this dx; get me on the proper meds and head me in the right direction. dh is ready to walk out and i can't blame him. one day or one year, i'll start feeling hopeful again. that i know.

    leslie xo
  6. by   Catsmeow
    hiyah

    My love hate relationship is with Texas. At one point I became so depressed (thinking I'd made a huge mistake moving my daughter down here, away from my family, into a rough area) I withdrew from everyone and everything. Got over that, now I'm attempting to love it, because I should have a positive attitude, but it's like a freakin' culture shock to me, and I look for reasons not to be sad about it. I just miss home. I'm VERY pleased with TX lately though 'cause I realized since college is MUCH cheaper down south I can attend full time for the first time ever... so... THAT makes me about 10,000,000 times more pleased with the Lone Star state. (Back home tuition was $5000 a semester, down here it's less than $1000)

    Fun2Care -- is your sister depressed maybe? Could just be she's a pita but maybe she should go see her doc.. just a thought to help... you all probly already thought of that.

    Warmest wishes,
    Cats
  7. by   Fun2, RN, BSN
    Quote from Catsmeow
    Fun2Care -- is your sister depressed maybe? Could just be she's a pita but maybe she should go see her doc.. just a thought to help... you all probly already thought of that.
    I'm sure of it, problem is, she has made her own bed.....now she is realizing that she has to lie in it.

    She won't listen to anyone trying to reason with her. She's the type of person that can't stay at home because life is wasting away...

    Hopefully, she'll grow up soon. It's hard to party hardy when your wallet is empty dempty. lol She just has to realize it, and my mom has to stop dishing out the dough to keep peace.
  8. by   Catsmeow
    Quote from Fun2Care
    I'm sure of it, problem is, she has made her own bed.....now she is realizing that she has to lie in it.

    She won't listen to anyone trying to reason with her. She's the type of person that can't stay at home because life is wasting away...

    Hopefully, she'll grow up soon. It's hard to party hardy when your wallet is empty dempty. lol She just has to realize it, and my mom has to stop dishing out the dough to keep peace.
    :smackingf Urgh. Here's to hoping she sees the light. These are situations in which the only answer that comes to my mind is... God. lol

    Cats
  9. by   live4today
    Quote from catsmeow
    ........urgh. here's to hoping she sees the light. these are situations in which the only answer that comes to my mind is... god. lol

    cats
    amen to that! :d and um...i should know since god has brought me through many a dark day in my life. now when i sing "amazing grace", i sing it with a whole different "light" shed on my life.

    :melody: amazing grace...how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me. i once was lost, but now am found; was blind, but now i see. :melody:

    fun....in his time...not ours...for we do not know all that our lives impact. your sister's "easter" will come. stay encouraged for her, and continue praying for her "light" to come.........i'm living proof of emerging from the darkest place in my life to being brought into the "light" where all things unseen are now seen.....spiritually seen to where there's no turning back into that dark dark place ever again for where there is light there can be no darkness because "light" illuminates everything that lies in darkness, and darkness has no power over light!!! amen? amen!!!! :hatparty: :angel2: :icon_hug:

    cat....i lived in san antonio for two years a few years ago, and couldn't wait to leave. my allergies were super magnified in that city! there wasn't a day that went by that i could go without my prescription allergy medications. our doggie was sick with newly acquired "texan allergies" and had to be on medication for his sneezes and watery eyes. poor baby. i swore i'd never return to live in tx ever again. where do i reside now? tx. so, that just goes to show us that the very thing or place we wish to avoid, may be the very place that god brings us to heal...whether for a "season" or for a lifetime. it's in his timing that all things he has in store for us will be revealed for it is his plan that always prevails...for our own good. i may want to go one way, but when i completely trust god with my life, his plan may not even slightly resemble my proposed plan. :kiss and when we are obedient to his plan for our lives, the rewards that will come are more than we ever hoped to gain. hang in there! stay encouraged! get your schooling during this "season" that god has given you. and, yes........i will take my own advice. :kiss

    okay..i need to go to sleep now...i'm making too many spelling errors.
    Last edit by live4today on Dec 27, '05
  10. by   Jessy_RN
    2000, was a year that I really hate to remember. This 2005, has been one of the best in my life. It was my first year of marriage that has been going very well. Have been successful in my studies and have gained a family here at allnurses!
  11. by   SmilingBluEyes
    You know my answer if you know me and have read my rantings about my mother.

    Yes I have a strong love-hate relationship with her and it pains me to no end.
  12. by   Lisa CCU RN
    Let's start with the good. I love this year because:

    1. My daughter started kindergarten.

    2. I got into nursing school on the first try.

    3. I figured out how to fix my credit.

    4. I got rid of my emotionally abusive, manipulative, anti-social personality disorder having, husband.

    5. I figured out this year I can do anything I put my mind to.

    6.- infinity. Too many more blessings to name.

    Now the bad.

    1. I got rid of my children's father, and for this I am truly sad. I don't know if he will ever get the help he needs because he doesn't know he has a problem. All I can do is pray.

    If God can get my husband to see how much his selfish attitude is hurting us then 2006 will be perfect despite any other obstacles I may face.
    Last edit by Lisa CCU RN on Nov 18, '06
  13. by   live4today
    crna.........i want to applaud you for the wise choice of standing your ground against abuse --- whether that abuse comes from a total stranger, a blood relative, or a spouse. no one...and i mean no one should ever tolerate abuse.........not emotional, physical, mental, or spiritual....just do not tolerate the abuse! you did what you had to do to protect your children and yourself from an abuser. leave the "issues" of your spouse in god's most capable hands because i have learned many times through many trials in my life that "the battle is not mine...but our lord's. and, that lesson did not come easy to me. it was a painful lesson for sure. but, now that i am free from the abuse, i am free indeed. i have been set free from all abuse. i can recognize abuse when i see it, hear it, and feel it. i recognize that which is truth now. so, if something doesn't look like, talk like, or walk like truth..........it's abuse in my book. give yourself a bow! you deserve it! :icon_hug:
  14. by   ProfRN4
    [font="century gothic"]awesome thread...

    2005- the year i love to hate.

    con's- they're easier, so i'll start here

    separated from my husband, and since march, have been on this unbelievable emotional rollercoaster...

    major financial issues (see above for reason)...

    realized i will need an extra semester to finish grad school (see above again)...


    pro's-

    got a new job as an instructor...

    my 'baby' is growing up- started kindergarten. i love watching her grow...

    got a new apartment (see above).... this is a good thing, as i really do like my own place. can do whatever i want...

    the year comes in neck and neck with 1994. the year i got married (the first time- which ended badly), graduated nursing school, failed nclex, and lost my brother to suicide.

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