fun quotes


    1. I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb .... and I also know that I'm not blonde.
    -Dolly Parton-

    2. You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy.
    -Erica Jong-

    3. I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours.
    -Rita Rudner-

    4. I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog.
    -Wendy Liebman-

    5. Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.
    -Erma Bombeck-

    6. If high heels were so wonderful, men would still be wearing them.
    -Sue Grafton-

    7. I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.
    -Roseanne Barr-

    8. I think-therefore I'm single.
    -Lizz Winstead-

    9. When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country.
    -Elayne Boosler-

    10. Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.
    -Maryon Pearson-

    11. I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch.
    -Gilda Radner-

    12. In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman.
    -Margaret Thatcher-

    13. I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career.
    -Gloria Steinem-

    14. Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry
    -Gloria Steinem-

    15. I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog that growls every morning, a parrot that swears all afternoon, and a cat that comes home late at night
    -Marie Corelli-

    16. Nagging is the repetition of unpalatable truths.
    -Baroness Edith-Summerskill

    17. If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?
    -Linda Ellerbee-

    18. I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.
    -Zsa Zsa Gabor-

    19. Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.
    -Eleanor Roosevelt-
    Last edit by CEN35 on Sep 25, '01
  2. 5 Comments

  3. by   e-nurse
    Number 19 is interesting seeing how most of the first 18 make me as a man feel inferior!
  4. by   tiger
    i like #7 myself. just a joke thing. please no men take offense.
    Last edit by tiger on Sep 24, '01
  5. by   donmurray
    Then don't please be offended by "Behind every successful woman is a pile of unwashed laundry!" Just kidding!
  6. by   CEN35
    I have to say #19!

    Sorry for the edit.........all those goofy email arrows drove me nuts!!!

  7. by   tiger
    rick--thanks for the edit. i don't know how all those goofy arrows got on there. they weren't on the page i copied and pasted from.