For those of you moms that have/or are going through the teenage phases w/ your kids:

  1. My mom has been pusing me and pushing me to get a job. She keeps dwelling on my past job always saying, "why can't you just go back and see if they'll hire you back?" I left that place for a reason, and I'm not going to waste my time trying to work somewhere I'm not wanted.

    As some of you know, my mother and I haven't had the best of a relationship. Those of you mothers out there that have/had teenagers, you know how all of a sudden your life is changing, and your kids lives are changing. I have changed a lot since last summer. I'm getting more serious about my life, trying to do everything I can to make it the best. I'm also becoming more serious about my boyfriend. (Please don't judge me, or say that I'm crazy for saying this) But even at my age now, I am really serious about wanting to spend the rest of my life w/ my boyfriend. I feel sometimes that I don't want to tell you guys this because you would try to tell me from a mothers point of view, "oh, you just think that now" Or, "you're too young to be thinking about that stuff." I hear it from too many people.

    I'm kinda veering off my point here but, I don't know. I know I can't have the same relationship with my mother that I had 2 years ago. She's not the same woman, and neither am I. My life is changing so fast, and as mine changes, hers does too. As of this point, my mother and I are just clashing. We disagree on almost everything. I want to spend more time with her sometimes, but she makes it hard, and I'm sure I make it hard for her. I'm not trying to blame everything on her, I know that I am at fault too. I may even be the majority of the reason we don't get along too much.

    For those of you mothers that hate the teenage years, and the phases your kids go through: We don't like it much either. It's hard for our lives to change so quickly, we're growing up and sometimes we get scared about what's ahead of us. Mom's get scared about what's ahead for their kids lives too, they're afraid that their kid may not come home tonight, or their going to get a call from the cops. I am enjoying my teenage years, but I am also not. I wish some things have never happened.

    Well, that's my 2 cents for the night...can you tell I didn't have a good day today? I came home an hour late tonight, and I tried to sneak past my sleeping mom, but she was dead awake. We sat in the living room and just yelled at eachother and cried. :chuckle

    Weird or what?
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  2. 2 Comments

  3. by   live4today
    First of all.......gotta give ya some (((((((((((hugs)))))) and a big :kiss for feeling bad about how you and your Mom do NOT get along. It WILL pass as long as you AND your mother keep the doors of communication OPEN. I won't sound like a mother...well....not too much.....as I know this usually turns a lot of teens away. I will add that for as long as you are a Minor, your Mother's word and ways "Rule" because Mothers rarely bend their rules when they know that by doing so, their child could be harmed in some way....even if the child grows up just fine.

    As women......at one point in our lives, some of us WILL have the golden opportunity to see BOTH sides of being a woman...as someone's Mother and as someone's Daughter. It's oftentimes when these two phases merge with one another that we learn that we weren't as smart as we once believed ourselves to be, and that Momma's lookin' pretty smart the older we get, and the older our own daughters become. REMEMBER I SAID THIS AS IT WILL COME TO HAUNT YOU DOWN THE ROAD.....MARK MY WORDS. :chuckle

    May I encourage you to make a fun date with your Mother when you are both NOT on the rag.....PMSing....you know.....so your emotions are fairly even for the date. During the downtime of this fundate, embrace your mom, then look her square in the eyes, and say to her "Mom, as your daughter, I want you to know that I acknowledge whatever fear you may have about my growing older and possibly being hurt by life. I also want you to know that as a young woman myself, there are still those times when I need you more than you realize, but there are also those times when I feel as if I am at a place in my life that I can handle some aspects of it. How about we make a Mother/Daughter pact here...right now...that we will respect one another's concerns about our lives and the inevitable changes that will occur, and at the same time agreeing to never let go of one another or allow our differences and perceptions to come between our love for one another because one day, I'd like for you to be my best friend as well as my mom, and vice versa."

    If that doesn't bring tears to your Mothers eyes, and put a warm fuzzy in her heart, nothing will. Moms need to be needed no matter how old their kiddies get. I know. I have three adult daughters myself.........yet......in that same tone.....I AM a daughter myself to a woman I call Mom......so I can see BOTH sides of that spectrum. Nighty night.......I'll chat more with you tomorrow afternoon sometime. :kiss

    Now...here's an attachment for you to put in your train of thought where your Mom is concerned:
    Last edit by live4today on Aug 7, '02
  4. by   ellie123
    I can remember almost the excate same situation with my mother. I think we were at each other necks from the age 16-18. We did understand each others views, nor did we probably really try that hard. Just honestly try to sit back and see her perspective and maybe ask her to do the same. Although you may never met eye to eye at this point, you both may see some small speck of the others point. After this rough point in both of your lives you will probably find out you both are alot more alike then you ever knew. Just hang in there and let her know even though your beginning a whole new stage in your life, she is still part of it and you still respect her. Good luck-

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