Well, my debit card was stolen on Thanksgiving, and $600 later, the day after, I finally found out and cancelled it. The really bad thing is, I think i know who did it. Even though he denies it, he took $20 from my purse a prior occassion. (o.k. this gets worse, I didn't dump him after that.) When I met this guy he had 3 years clean. Then he started using again, and has gone in and out of recovery since. He's created more wreckage (yes, he's a fellon too) since using drugs. A week or so prior to this, I gave him my PIN and my card to put gas in my car which I had also let him borrow, (can you believe this story? The guy doesn't have a car either, sold it for drugs the last time out.) On Thanksgiving eve, he stayed with me and that morning I bought a pie. That was the last time I saw the card. It was used at 4:36pm on thanksgiving at a branch very near his house at the ATM. And $100 at a liquor store nearby. I immediately shut off his cell phone, (also in my name, I know, I know, this keeps getting worse all the time), so he calls me about 3:00 to ask what's up with his phone since the phone company now is refusing to give any info on the account. I accused him and he denied taking the card and money. Now the situation is, whether he did it or not, and come on, all the evidence points to him, I can't keep someone in my life that I cannot trust. You'd think I would have learned this after the first $20.00. You guys must just think I'm incredibly dense. Why would someone with so much together be dating a jerk like this? I don't know. One of you will tell me it's a self esteem issue, I'm sure. It's the old comfortable relationship thing. We met in recovery (I'm 7 years sober) and we've just been seeing each other forever. I didn't want to believe that it was him that took the 20.00. When he got clean (for the umpteenth time) he admitted to me that he had taken it. He apologized and paid back that plus some other money he owed me. So I gave him another chance, boy do I feel like a loser now. Not only am I out the $600 while the bank and Sherrif's dept. research this, but turning off the cell phone will cost me a penalty of $150 plus all the charges that he currently owes. I figure I'm in an additional 360 with all that crap plus the $600. AND I don't have the phone, he does. Now that it's turned off, I can't contact him unless he calls me. When I told him that the bank has surveillence on the ATMs he said thank god, that the videos would clear him. But that doesn't clear him, because the Sherrifs said that he could have asked someone else to use it if he shared 1/2 the money with them or something. Being an honest person, that didn't even occur to me. I feel that I have to cut this guy loose either way (I know, you're saying DUH!!!!) and it's upsetting, because even though on paper this guy looks like a real *******, he did little things, like remember if I had a big exam and call to ask how it went. He took me to nice dinners when he had the money, crab, lobster, whatever, he didn't sweat it. So even though he's f'd up, I've overlooked it and stayed with him. Now a major part of my emotional support is gone, and I feel so alone. I've been keeping busy with making jewlery (a hobby of mine) and studying. I've been praying about the situation. All I can do is wait, and let the Sherrifs do their job. It's a pretty powerless feeling. I've decided to avoid the guys phone calls in the mean time. He know's I'm emotionally sucked-in, and if he's lying he's being pretty convincing about it. I have to stay away to keep my head clear.
Now go ahead and give me the "10 stupid things smart women do" speech. I deserve the dumb chick of the year award.