DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE

  1. WHAT IF YOU ARE THE DIFFICULT PERSON? I SEEM TO HAVE TROUBLE KEEPING MY MOUTH SHUT OR MY COMMENTS POLITICALLY CORRECT. OR IS IT CORPORATELY CORRECT? THERE I GO AGAIN. ANY HINTS BESIDES COUNTING TO TEN? IT IS HUMBLING TO HAVE TO ADMIT THAT THE PROBLEM IS MINE, BUT I WOULD LIKE TO IMPROVE.
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  2. 19 Comments

  3. by   cisco kid
    i know what you are saying, i also am usually politically incorrect and have even been told i may need a sensitivity training class to improve my tact, or lack of it, unfortunately i call it like i see it. i never intentionally would hurt someone,s feeling but have inadvertently done just that.
    lately i have just been trying to keep busy and to engage my brain befor opening my mouth good luck,
  4. by   A.B.Meadows
    I like this topic sense I describes me totally. But hey, what ever happened to the plain truth...I prefer the old school. I am just a little sick of this sugar-coating. I took it as a great compliment today when someone said, "you are the only one here that is straight-up". I like just being me instead of worrying about what others want me to be. If being honest and free with my opinion is brash, brazen, and b*tchy...not to mention politically incorrect...then yep thats me. I have been wrongly accused of being insensitive and of lacking tact. This new form of communication makes it a lot more difficult to judge ones honest opinion about anything. I am hopeless...so go ahead and add my name to that "Difficult People" list.
  5. by   Louie18
    In 1960 I was hired as a clerk in a drugstore. (with a soda fountain)
    When hired Mr. Lucas looked me in the eye and said; "I can stand a thief, but I can't stand a liar."
    louie
  6. by   neonnurse
    Originally posted by C.DOSS:
    WHAT IF YOU ARE THE DIFFICULT PERSON? I SEEM TO HAVE TROUBLE KEEPING MY MOUTH SHUT OR MY COMMENTS POLITICALLY CORRECT. OR IS IT CORPORATELY CORRECT? THERE I GO AGAIN. ANY HINTS BESIDES COUNTING TO TEN? IT IS HUMBLING TO HAVE TO ADMIT THAT THE PROBLEM IS MINE, BUT I WOULD LIKE TO IMPROVE.
  7. by   neonnurse
    Originally posted by C.DOSS:
    WHAT IF YOU ARE THE DIFFICULT PERSON? I SEEM TO HAVE TROUBLE KEEPING MY MOUTH SHUT OR MY COMMENTS POLITICALLY CORRECT. OR IS IT CORPORATELY CORRECT? THERE I GO AGAIN. ANY HINTS BESIDES COUNTING TO TEN? IT IS HUMBLING TO HAVE TO ADMIT THAT THE PROBLEM IS MINE, BUT I WOULD LIKE TO IMPROVE.
    C.,
    Do you think that you may be just a wee bit too hard on yourself? You sound like a brutally honest person. How long have you been a nurse? I've been in this game for 9 years, and I've found that my responses to co-workers and pts, etc..has changed drastically from when I first started out. I'm usually the "quiet" one at work. Sometimes its best to sit back and just listen, then decide if its worth commenting own. For some reason, it seems unacceptable to have an opinion or even a bad day (in the world of nurses), because you'd be showing (shudder) negativity!.....whatever. I guess what I'm trying to say is tone it down at work and listen more. Think of it as a study in sociology!
  8. by   cmggriff
    I have no suggestions on how to change. I personally just apologize a lot. I say something to the effect that "I'm sorry if I made you think I care if I upset you or hurt your feelings."
  9. by   C.DOSS
    Originally posted by neonnurse:
    Originally posted by C.DOSS:
    WHAT IF YOU ARE THE DIFFICULT PERSON? I SEEM TO HAVE TROUBLE KEEPING MY MOUTH SHUT OR MY COMMENTS POLITICALLY CORRECT. OR IS IT CORPORATELY CORRECT? THERE I GO AGAIN. ANY HINTS BESIDES COUNTING TO TEN? IT IS HUMBLING TO HAVE TO ADMIT THAT THE PROBLEM IS MINE, BUT I WOULD LIKE TO IMPROVE.
    C.,
    Do you think that you may be just a wee bit too hard on yourself? You sound like a brutally honest person. How long have you been a nurse? I've been in this game for 9 years, and I've found that my responses to co-workers and pts, etc..has changed drastically from when I first started out. I'm usually the "quiet" one at work. Sometimes its best to sit back and just listen, then decide if its worth commenting own. For some reason, it seems unacceptable to have an opinion or even a bad day (in the world of nurses), because you'd be showing (shudder) negativity!.....whatever. I guess what I'm trying to say is tone it down at work and listen more. Think of it as a study in sociology!
  10. by   virmm1
    Quote from cmggriff
    I have no suggestions on how to change. I personally just apologize a lot. I say something to the effect that "I'm sorry if I made you think I care if I upset you or hurt your feelings."
    how about "you must have me confused with somebody how gives a d****""
  11. by   SmilingBluEyes
    DO NOT apologize a lot. Unless you are truly wrong, you do NOT do that. You stand your ground, politely and firmly. In nursing you will deal with myriad difficult people. Never cower in shame or guilt around them, it just feeds the bully in them and empowers them to treat you worse. May I suggest you may benefit from assertiveness training or books? I have a couple of good book suggestions and a website to visit regarding dealing with workplace bullies, if you are interested. Let me know-- I will PM you or put it here if others are interested.
  12. by   Fiona59
    Oh, how I can relate.

    My last performance report went along similar lines. Loved my work ethic, met all my skills, yada yada BUT we need to work on your interpersonal skills. I call a spade a spade, but apparently its a shovel.

    It all comes down to some people love you others dont.
  13. by   lil' girl
    Check out the attitude thread, maybe that will help you
  14. by   leslie :-D
    bullies come in all sizes, shapes and forms.
    some abrasively blunt; others very passive-aggressive.

    what you do want to attain, is asserting yourself w/o sinking to one's level.
    also a zero-tolerance attitude, that you just won't take it.

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