Daughter wants a pierced nose and tattoo

  1. Hi All,

    I was having lunch with my 14 year old daughter today and she was telling me about Anthony's cool tattoo and his pierced tongue. Ok, now I have know for a while she has a crush on him and he has started to call the house and they talk for a long time.
    Well anyway, now she wants a pierced nose and possibly a tattoo. I am ok with the pierced nose, I figure she could just remove the snot ring when and if she outgrows it but tattoos are permanent so that is where my concern lies. Sorry for the rambling, I just need to get others views on this topic. Would you let your teenage daughter get a pierced nose and tattoo? I am thinking of just the nose piercing as a compromise, what do you think?
  2. 21 Comments

  3. by   willie2003
    Well my sister got a tattoo when she turned 18 because my mother wouldn't sign for it before. She also got her nose pierced but that only lasted a week because it bugged the heck out of her.
    Last edit by willie2003 on Apr 18, '03
  4. by   rachel h
    I wanted a tattoo of roses around my wrist when I was 13. Bugged my mom to let my get one for about 2 years. I was so sure that I would just love it for the rest of my life if I could get it. 9 years later, I'm extremely happy my mom kept saying no...
  5. by   jnette
    I like your way of thinking, Bad. I like the compromise idea.

    See no harm with the nosethingie.... as you say, that can be removed if neccessary. But I feel she's way too young to be asking for a tatoo. Kids at that age understand the permanence issue.. they only think in terms of NOW. Later, at 22, if she no longer cares for it, she may well blame you for having allowed it.

    I'd be firm in having her wait until she is adult and on her own to make that judgement for herself. Just my thoughts on it, however... you're the mom !
  6. by   ptnurse
    I agree with the above. The nose ring is not permanent, but the tatoo thing would have to wait until she is grown. You are kind to compromise with her. I can't say with any conviction at all that I would let my daughter do either one.
  7. by   zudy
    I also have had the tatoo arguement with stepdaughters. I once read that ppl with tatoos are 9 times more likely to get hepititus. This is why the organ procurment organization in my state will not accept any organs from ppl with tatoos. I simply could not give in because of that. Holes from pearcings will grow back, but hepatitus can kill.
  8. by   memphispanda
    The majority of your tattoo artists (reputable, working in a shop, not a garage) wouldn't dream of working on a minor. Most states don't allow it, even if the parent consents.

    The hepatitis risk is through your garage/jailhouse "artists", and almost unheard of through tattoo studios at present. There has been a lot of headway in this area in the past several years. Through the artists increasing awareness of risks as well as the publics increased awareness, and increased governmental control, your risk of getting a disease through tattoos in a studio is almost none. The artist is at much higher risk than the "canvas".
  9. by   suzannasue
    Badbird, I completely understand your dilemma...probably just a crush on the guy thing...hopefully it will pass...
    My daughters and I were at Myrtle Beach many years ago..well anyway it was in the '90's...my middle daughter was hacking me to death "if you loved me you would let me get my eyebrow pierced "...we were just laughing it up, you know...she was 17...I finally said.. "ok...find someplace...you can have it done"....we went through the ritual of finding "the" ring for her brow...then the body piercing fella exhibited terrific technique in prepping the site...I know surgeons who would be envious of his maintaining sterilie technique...he explained the process to her...and she was "totally ready"...I stood back...took in a deep breath...so it was done...she sat up and became very pale, diaphoretic and began projectile vomiting... between the fella and myself we helped her regain her composure...and I then helped him clean up his piercing area while she retreated to the restroom...
    Well...later that afternoon, when the sensation began returning to that sensitive area she pipes up "you know, if you REALLY loved me you wouldn't have let me get my eyebrow pierced"...we all laughed...a week later she had removed the thing and that was that...
    My youngest daughter, just prior to her 18th birthday,proclaimed her desire for a tattoo... took me to the shop. Had the tatoo person show me around and I was relieved that the tools of the trade had improved over the years..one time use to prevent the spreading of nasty diseases..so I signed...she showed me the tat she loved so dearly...made the appointment for the next day...I guess in my parental naivete', I had envisioned the tatoo being small...she came by the hospital to show me her "body art"...well... well...the thing was on her lateral right thigh...it was HUGE...a tiger swimming in a river...was, I guess, 10 inches in length, 5 inches in width....I was amazed...shocked...I asked her if it was painful and she said she wouldn't be able to tell me until the next day...and the answer was "yes it hurts, but I'm not about to complain...I wanted it, I got it"....months later, she became a bit distant, or so I thought...she and I were not doing much communicating for about a week...ok...she was 18...I would speak to her and get "one word" answers or grunts...I understood all about the dilemmas of youths, thus didn't pressure her...the next week she said "Mama? Remember when I wouldn't talk to you last week? And I wouldn't eat anything you cooked,well, I have something to tell you..." I was about to have a CVA... She said," I had my tongue pierced and couldn't talk or eat !!!!!"...
    She then proceeded to stick out her tongue that was now sporting a piece of metal...wow...I had her gargling, rinsing and washing her mouth twice a day...she has continued getting tattoos and piercing and it all looks great on her...I do have to add that she had 2 rings put in her body that caused even ME to be in pain... I cannot tell you where they are except to tell you they are above her waist-line..ahem...you know where...
    I would speculate that your daughter will have a change of heart...about the tattoo, the piercing and Anthony...keep us posted...
  10. by   maeyken
    I'd definitely say no about the tattoo... too permenant.

    For the nose ring- when's her birthday? Maybe you could make her wait until her BD to get the nose ring, just to make sure it's what she really wants. I know many people that have nose rings, and although I'd never get one myself, they do look good on some people.

    Good luck!

    ~ mae
  11. by   jnette
    I remember my son wanting his tongue pierced all through highschool. I never liked them.. and I always considered myself a pretty kool mom. I just couldn't go with it. First, I wasn't going to pay for it, because I did not agree with it. Second, I was not going to sign for it because I did not agree with it. Neither would his dad. We allowed the little earring in 7th grade and thought anything else, he'd just have to wait for 'til he was on his own. He pleaded and snibbled all through highschool, but I stood my ground. Never said you "MAY NOT", just that I wouldn't sign or pay for it because I felt I was entitled to my rights as much as he was and that he should not ask me to go against my own better judgement... then when he was grown, he could do as he wished. He was kool with that in the end.

    He wasn't out of H>S> and working more than a couple months, when he came sporting that tongue thingie, grinning from ear to ear. Well, fair is fair.
    Now I'm glad he has the tongue thing which is pretty unnoticable unless he makes a point of showing you, instead of nuts, bolts, and rings all over his face. He's 22 now and hasn't added anymore hardware. Thank goodness !

  12. by   renerian
    I am so glad to comment on this. I have five kids. Almost 23, 21, 20, 18 and 15. Only one, the 20 year old got his ears, chin, tongue and eyebrow pierced-all without our knowledge before he was 18. The chin lasted about six months, the tongue about six weeks and now all the piercing are gone over two years later. I got a tatoo at 43. I love my tattoo. I sure understand your battle. It is so hard especially since it is so popular. I like the small diamonds on the nose, they are so pretty.

    Do you have one you could live with more than the other?

  13. by   Hellllllo Nurse
    I agree that the nose ring would be okay, but not the tattoo. I wanted a tattoo for many years. I finally got one last year.... but, I was 37 at the time.

    They are just too permanent.

    About people w/ tattoos not being able to donate organs... Not even if they've had the Hep Vaccine series and have documentation of immunity?

    I do.
  14. by   mastiff38
    Here's another vote for the nose ring, but against the tattoo.

    My stepdaughter started begging for a tatto when she was about 12 or 13. Drove us NUTS about it for several years! She just couldn't accept "no" for an answer. "Dad has lots of them and you have one, so why can't I?" Well, we knew her a little better than she knew herself back then. This was the girl whose favorite band was Allman Brothers one week, then Black Crowes the next... she was the type to constantly change her mind. My argument was that she changed her mind about everything so often, that a week after she got a tattoo she'd be saying "I wish I had gotten something different instead." So we stuck to our answer, no matter how much she begged.

    We paid for her first tattoo as her 18th birthday gift last year, and she still loves it and she actually admits that she's really glad she waited! She says that she can't believe some of the goofy ideas she came up with for tattoos when she was younger, and is really happy none of them are permanently on her body.

    Wow, we did something right! I didn't think parents ever did anything right!

    BTW, I wanted a tattoo for about 6 or 7 years before I got mine. It took me that long to find a design I was 100% sure I wouldn't grow tired of later. You've gotta be sure about these things!