Buyer's Remorse (as in Career Remorse)

  1. A couple of you may remember my dilemma about if I should stay at the clinic, finish grad school, or take the research nurse position. Well, I took the research position.

    I started my new job on Monday. It's Thursday. I hate it.

    I love the physician I am working for, and she seems to have confidence in me to perform, and I want to perform for her. The molecular biologists I am working with also seem nice so far, two in particular. The assistant is ultra nice and has been a lifesaver so far. But...I am alone in there. Alone to figure out what the f**k was done before me and how to resume. My email doesn't work. The printer doesn't print. I don't have staff privileges yet at the hospitals I am to recruit at (the sponsoring Doc won't return my calls). I have no idea how to make sure all the consents are approved by the review boards on a timely manner. I have no idea who to call. I don't know how to order nursing supplies. I don't know which tubes to collect my blood draws in. I don't know........

    I left today and drove to class tonight and on the way passed my old job. I pulled in briefly and stopped and waved at my old co-worker. I am so, so sad.

    The physician is hiring another nurse just like me, so maybe I will wait until she comes on board and then see. But so far I am miserable. Just miserable. I don't know what to do. And school sucks. Every week I have a damn presentation to give....

    Sorry for venting. But....well, I needed to vent.
  2. Visit Q. profile page

    About Q.

    Joined: Mar '01; Posts: 7,470; Likes: 55
    Patient Education
    Specialty: 7 year(s) of experience in LDRP; Education


  3. by   live4today
    ((((((((((Suzy K)))))))))) :kiss

    If it's okay with you, I'll say a prayer for you. Hang in there and give it a little while longer. The beginning of a new job is always like learning to swim for the first time. The waters seem far more frightening than they end up being after one masters the task before them. I hope it all works out well for you. If not.....there are plenty more options for you to open yourself up to. We are only stuck in life if we allow ourselves to be. Explore....spread your wings......get them and learn along the way.....this job happened to you for a reason.....take from it what lessons are there.....and if it doesn't will only come away having grown more in yourself and your profession. :kiss
  4. by   kaycee
    Give it more time. Hopefully it will get better, especially when the other nurse comes on board. What type of research are you doing? Can't the MD that you're working for help you with ordering supplies and getting your printer fixed?
    Hang in there Susy and feel free to vent anytime.
  5. by   Stargazer
    Ah, Susy, that sucks. I'm sorry this isn't starting better--the job sounded so great!

    Who is your supervisor here? Is it the doc? Can you go to her and explain to us what you've just said here--that you like the people and find the work interesting, but you don't currently have the tools, the knowledge, or the protocols to do your job properly?

    They knew when they hired you that you hadn't held a research job, right? So they can't expect to drop you in the middle of things without any guidance and be successful. And unless someone's got a weird secret agenda that they WANT you to fail, which seems unlikely, somebody needs to step up and help you set things up so that you can do your job.

    I hope you're able to stick it out a little longer--from the way you're describing it, it sounds like they're a bunch of well-meaning peopole who are just incredibly disorganized. When is the new nurse going to get there?

    Anyway, you know you can come here and b*tch anytime. (((Susy))) Hang in there.
    So sorry Susy. Give it some time. Maybe when you get to know the others a little more, and you get the other nurse in there you won't feel so alone.

  7. by   semstr
    Susy, sorry to hear this. but hey, maybe it will be better in a few weeks? Doesn't sound like you to give up after 4 days!!
    Write to us about everything and how it goes, but please don't give up yet!!
    Thinking of you, Renee
  8. by   LasVegasRN
    Give it time. You've got the know-how and skill to be able to make a difference in that position - trust your creativity and skills, you'll do fine!
    If in 4 weeks it is still frustrating and you don't feel you are getting anywhere, be very honest with your new employer. If they are a good employer, they will be open to hearing about what you've identified as problems and should be open to hearing your suggestions for solutions.
  9. by   hoolahan

    I remember being amazed that you could go to grad school, and start an entirly new career in nursing, one that is highly regulated no less.

    Sounds like people are nice, but not supporting you. I think you need to be honest with your supervisor. Sounds like she's cnfident you'll figure it out is another way of saying "You're on your own babe!"

    I think, no I know you have the smarts to do it, so hang in, strating by reading the P&P books. IT is hard to sit back and have your hands tied when your stuff doesn't work. You will eventually find the "right" person to fix that stuff, it's never who they say it is. And while it is hard, when they start asking why you haven't done this or that, , you can say I have asked for this to happen several times, it's out of your hands.

    Every research study has a guide to follow. Read what tubes are to be used. If it doesn't tell you, call the lab you send the tubes to to find out what test goes in what tube. Get the lab to send you a chart of the tubes and what they are used for. I imagine some tubes will be special for whatever levels of stuff you are studying if a drug study.

    GO around and meet people, it's usually the support people, ands secretaries who can help you the most in the beginning of a new job, that's what I have found anyway. I am always sweet to secretaries, they can make or breaK you!

    I hated my new job too the first two weeks, last week I loved it, this week I hate it again. Take it day by day. Snoop around for manuals and stuff to read and learn how thiungs work. You are smart, and when it all comes together, it will feel very rewarding to you b/c you did it on your own.

    Give yourself a break, it must be very hard to learn a whole new role and be in grad school. I know I could never do both.
  10. by   hoolahan
  11. by   NurseDennie
    SusyK -

    I can emphasize with you. This seems to be the only way to enter this field! I was asking somebody about it, and everybody says the same thing: dumped in, either with a study half-done, trying to figure out what the last nurse had done, or else starting something out new without any kind of meaningful orientation.

    I agree with with Hoolian told you just look around and find out as you go. I didn't know from tubes for blood draws, either (I'd never done a blood draw!!) but I found a lab book, and it's specific. For a CMP, you need an amber-top 7 cc tube. So that helps.

    Ask for help when you need it and just be friendly and ... oh you know. It really is a pretty cool way to make a living. There's a lot of flexibility in a lot of these research jobs.


  12. by   Q.
    Thanks for all your replies. There are other pieces to the puzzle that may help to explain too some of the frustration.

    Some of you asked who my supervisor is. Well, my supervisor is the doc herself. VERY nice and we get along great. Her study is funded by the NIH, so she carries a big club around the College.

    The previous nurse before me: well, let's say that she didn't work out, and the doc figured that out as did the College. You mention that research is highly regulated. Yes, it is. And this previous nurse didn't necessarily pay attention to those details. A lot of potential patients were lost because the inappropriate consent form was used. Specimens of blood and urine were mislabeled or lost. On top of that, this nurse wasn't the greatest record keeper. It appears that she tried, but didn't quite get it.

    The prior nurse called me and I asked what color tubes she had to use, how much blood. She gave me a vague answer. Finally, I asked the molecular biologists (I couldn't ask the lab because the tests we are running are not standard; it's DNA extraction, etc and actually one of the biologists increases the vaccum in the vaccutainer to allow for an additionl ml of blood). So I got that straightened out. The lab directories this nurse had were dated 1999! Not current! So I made some calls and have new ones being routed to me.

    There IS some light at the end of the tunnel. The doc who needs to grant me staff privileges at the hospital I am to be recruiting finally contacted me and we are meeting next week; I also contacted the more general clinical trials area were the research nurses actually "hang out" and will be spending a day with them on Wednesday to get a feel of things. I need orientation on the IRB and the NIH guidelines, etc.

    The doc and I on the way out tonight had a bit of a heart to heart, and I think she sensed my frustration, and I sensed hers from the prior nurse's work that she left behind. So at least it seems that the staff understand that I am digging out of a hole here.

    There are definite advantages to this job but I still miss the simplicity of the clinic.

    Stargazer, yes they knew I didn't have research experience, so I think they aren't expecting TOO much from me yet.

    Dennie- are you working in research?

    LasVegasRN,(and others) thanks for the words of support.