Busy Americans are just #%*! rude

  1. A recent post about nurses being rude prompted me to share this article. It's not just a nursing issue.

    People think you're rude.

    They think Americans in general are getting ruder and cruder -- a nation of inconsiderate jerks.

    Nearly eight out of 10 Americans say a lack of respect and courtesy is a serious problem in our society.

    Six out of 10 drivers say they often see others driving recklessly. Nearly half of us stalked out of a store last year because of poor customer service. And half of us are regularly forced to listen to people carrying on loud or annoying cell phone conversations in public.

    Those are the findings of a nationwide survey on manners that were released Tuesday. Apparently....
    Read article in its entirety:

    http://www.sptimes.com/2002/04/03/Ta...s_are_ju.shtml
    Last edit by sirI on Sep 7, '07 : Reason: edit for copyright purposes
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  2. 40 Comments

  3. by   Stargazer
    I think there's a valid point made there: people feel freer to be rude in public, in cars, on the phone and on the internet (!) due to the relative anonymity. They don't perceive that there are any consequences to being rude.

    The disconnect issue is valid too. I cerainly want to scream at someone after calling a company or utility and being consigned to the bowels of Phone Menu Hell instead of being able to talk to a real live person.

    I think the main problem is stress. Everyone today is overextended, overscheduled and is always trying to do 3 or 4 things at once, instead of concentrating on the task at hand, thus failing to notice (and therefore managing to annoy) the folks around you.

    I don't agree with the implication that Europeans are never rude, though! Unfortunately, I encountered several instances of rudeness in otherwise lovely London. (The stereotypical Ugly American abroad? Well, that's another story--long, sad, and all-too-often true---but for another time.)
  4. by   Huganurse
    ..
    Last edit by Huganurse on Jun 30, '02
  5. by   live4today
    Originally posted by Stargazer:

    "I don't agree with the implication that Europeans are never rude, though! Unfortunately, I encountered several instances of rudeness in otherwise lovely London. (The stereotypical Ugly American abroad? Well, that's another story--long, sad, and all-too-often true---but for another time.)"

    _________________________________________________


    When we lived abroad in Augsburg, Germany, the people there were so helpful, kind, polite, and friendly! We loved that little quaint Southern Bavarian city!

    Then, we were soon transferred to Frankfurt, Germany where we found most of the people we encountered to be rude, obnoxious, less than helpful or friendly.

    I think the difference between the two cities was Augsburg was a small town where people came to live because they were more family oriented like many of our small cities here in America are. There were also more older people (over 60) who were the nicest of all. Frankfurt is a huge city (to me), and has a much younger population of career oriented people who live fast-paced lifestyles. I could be wrong about the way I am summing up both those cities, but at the time, it helped me to cope with Frankfurt's rudeness.

    I always enjoy living in small towns versus big cities since I perceive the small towns to be more people-friendly. I was raised in a small town, and raised my children in a small town, so I am just a "small town" kind of gal, I guess!
  6. by   night owl
    People may be rude, but there's nuthin like suthin hospitality! People from the south are so very nice. My car broke down in SC and people were just so willing to help me fix it...People that I didn't even know! One man at the gas station closed his business down and tried to "rig" my car so that I could at least drive it to the dealer 10 mi away. He couldn't fix it so I tried to give him some money and he wouldn't take it. I slipped it into his pocket anyway. At the restaurant across the street the waitress said, "Oh my brother is a mechanic. I'll just call him and he'll come and fix it for ya'll." They just go out of their way for people. You won't find that up north that's for sure and it's sad. The other day, I was stopped at a light. The man coming from the opposite direction was also stopped. When the light turned green, his car stalled. The man behind him got out of his car, went up to him and started pounding on his window like a wildman yelling and screaming. I couldn't believe it! :eek He was just CrAzY! I floored it and said to myself, "Let's get out of here before he starts shootin'!"
    What's wrong with society today? Everyone is in a hurry, no one has any patience anymore, and stress levels are on constant alert. It seems that it's getting worse. Just how crazy is it going to get? Makes me nervous to drive anymore.
  7. by   sharann
    When people are downright rude I generally attribute it to poor upbringing by parents who didn't care or weren't there. I may get yelled at for this , but it is only my opinion. When children are brought up without knowing to say "please" or "thanks" it burns my butt. I have actually seen kids talk back to a sales clerk who said they had to leave the store because they were just walking around for 1 hour in a Sav-On drugstore. They were not
    shopping, they were "loitering" at 9pm on Friday night. The nervy brat argued with this woman (not only an employee but an ELDER) for some time claiming he had a RIGHT to be there as long as he wanted. As a kid, I would NEVER even THINK of disrespecting an authority figure. Thes kids, I think, grow into rude SOB's.
    This again is just my view, so don't bash me too much guys
  8. by   hogan4736
    sharann is 100% right...the subhumans (sp?) breeding and feeding, not teaching manners to their offspring. (if I had a dime for every time a kid or adult coughed on me in triage!!)

    i see less "thank you waves" in traffic when you let someone in, being on a bicycle is a suicide mission in phoenix: cars are always blocking driveways, and when you make eye contact, you get a glare...a new lane opens up in the supermarket and the last person in line (w/ a cart full of stuff) rushes to the new lane (this is rudeness on the part of the customer, and stupidity on the part of the cashier - she should get the person that would be next...poor training on the store's part)...

    The ultimate in rudeness (to the taxpayers) is when a person on welfare is in the ER yammering on his cell phone wearing new Nikes and a Polo shirt.

    people suck
    Last edit by hogan4736 on Apr 3, '02
  9. by   live4today
    Originally posted by sharann
    When people are downright rude I generally attribute it to poor upbringing by parents who didn't care or weren't there. I may get yelled at for this , but it is only my opinion. When children are brought up without knowing to say "please" or "thanks" it burns my butt. I have actually seen kids talk back to a sales clerk who said they had to leave the store because they were just walking around for 1 hour in a Sav-On drugstore. They were not
    shopping, they were "loitering" at 9pm on Friday night. The nervy brat argued with this woman (not only an employee but an ELDER) for some time claiming he had a RIGHT to be there as long as he wanted. As a kid, I would NEVER even THINK of disrespecting an authority figure. Thes kids, I think, grow into rude SOB's.
    This again is just my view, so don't bash me too much guys

    Hi sharann,

    I agree with your post comments and give it a THUMBS UP for sure! Manners are to be both taught and caught, and they aren't easily learned beyond Momma's knee. Meaning, after a kid reaches a certain age and has been allowed to be rude, they may remain rude well into their adult years. My children are adults with children of their own, and I still correct them when I feel they could have been more polite to someone, but overall, I'm proud of the way they conduct themselves. My eleven grandchildren have excellent manners -- they use them too -- or their parents are on them like honey on a beehive, so I remind the parents to have manners, use those manners, and be an example to their little ones if they expect them to believe that the use of manners IS important in life.
    Last edit by live4today on Apr 3, '02
  10. by   P_RN
    Our paper today had a similar story. They blamed it all on Elvis....from shaking hips to rude behavior, Elvis seemed to be the cut off point .

    I'm happy that it was in SC that something nice happened. The mechanic was a real treat.

    Sunday my sister was at Sam's Club (Walmart-owned discount store for the OZ folks) with my Mother. My sis left her cane and a case of DeSani water in the cart by mistake. She realized it after they got back home. It was 5 minutes til closing so she knew she'd never get back there. The next day she called and asked "By the way did anybody find a cane there?"

    "Yes Ma'am" was the reply, "and you left your case of water here too."

    Unfortunately I have also experienced extreme rudeness. One day right before giving shift report another nurse slammed into the room and called me a G_D- BI*** fu**ing ...... well, you get the point. I hadn't xeroxed a paper she thought I should have. (She hadn't asked me to either.) nd last year there was the trial of the woman in Birmingham, with road rage.....
    Oh well.

    The cane and water story was nice anyway.
  11. by   micro
    (link is no longer valid)

    hope this address posts, but will not continue to repeat as have done in past.........if you can't connect.....just look up search for Miss Manners.........she is fluent on subject.......

    never thought I would agree with Miss Manners......

    glad to have this bb to share and vent and care about others.........
    Last edit by sirI on Sep 7, '07 : Reason: invalid link
  12. by   fergus51
    I'm with night owl on the southeners. I had a crazy road trip with a friend who was actually from Alabama and while we were driving through there I had more random acts of kindness than I think I have ever experienced in my entire life (including an invite for a home cooked meal when my friend found out her granmother had passed away and a stranger tracking me down in a small town to give me back my wallet with the 600$ still in it, etc.).

    I am Canadian by birth and before I moved to the US I was constantly warned about loud obnoxious Americans. Personally I don't think many of them are actually in the US because I never had any signifigant problems, they're all overseas and in Canada giving the rest of Americans a bad reputation....

    Renee, you don't even want to get me started on the Germans. I visited there frequently while I was living in the Czech Republic and I swear if I ever hear another German ask me why I would ever want to live in the Czech Republic (because Germany is obviously soooo much better) I will have to get a gun.... Otherwise found them to be friendly
  13. by   Katana
    I think rudeness is learned as well. Being polite and manners don't seem to be taught at home any more and then you do have those who feel that they are always right and/or superior to others so they don't have to be polite. "I'm paying big bucks for you to take care of me!" I actually get that so much at work that I want to wear a top that says, "I'm no ones servent so treat me like you want me to treat you."

    I have a friend who says, Yes, Ma'me. No, Sir. Thank you. and even holds doors open and opens car doors for you! It's amazing and totally enjoyable. His upbringing...... his father was a Rear Admiral in the Navy. He was also in the Navy... He definitely was taught manners and has never forgotten them nor does he act like he is superior to others and that they don't deserve his politeness.

    I'm glad that he's my friend.

    Kat
    Last edit by Katana on Apr 4, '02
  14. by   dawngloves
    I also agree that manners are no longer being taught in the home. Many expect the schools and the TV to raise their children. And I do attribute this to a busy lifestyle.
    Many work more and longer to afford things they think they need. Children are left unsupervised for hours at a time, tired parents come home and eat dinner sitting in front of the TV while the kids sit in front of a computer or TV in their room, they narey say a word to eachother.

    My two year old says please and thank you, why can't the clerk at the 7-11 say it? I blame her mother!

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