Bah Humbug!

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    The holidays are supposed to be a happy time for everyone. However, more and more people have problems and increasing stress. Sometimes its very hard to put on a happy face and pretend your world is all roses. Here are some coping mechanisms that have helped me.

    Bah Humbug!

    Okay, so due to an extremely serious family issue, I am the scrooge of the year. The Christmas decorations, music, greetings from everyone, even the Salvation Army kettle bell ringer has set my last nerve on edge.

    So, for those of us who are so not in the holiday spirit this year, how do we cope?

    Well, for me this is what has worked for me this year:

    1. Write down my feelings and thoughts and then I erase them. Somehow putting them down in print makes them real but by erasing them, I acknowledge that they aren't going to completely control me.

    2. I have made a concerted effort to help others this season. It is very difficult to focus on ME when I'm doing something for YOU! So far this year, I have been able to share a little extra time and energy with my grandkids and family. It has made the situation at least bearable. The kids are so joyous and innocent in their wonder of the season. Helps this very sad adult to cope.

    3. Keep very busy. I have purposefully taken on a new task at work so that my mind is engaged in something positive versus perseverating on the negative.

    4. I chose not to attend Christmas parties this year. Several of my co-workers know my situation and their kindness has been so appreciated. However, the time isn't right yet that I can talk about it without crying. And...who wants people crying at the office Christmas party? (lol)

    5. I have tried to allow myself some time to be sad, angry, etc., as this is truly a grieving process but I have to really, really try to not allow it to consume me. And.....if I'm not careful, it might - lol.

    6. Realize that time heals many wounds. In the beginning, the sadness from some life events can seem overwhelming. With time (and for different situations, it takes different amounts of time), it does get easier. Not sure if we get used to the new "new" (but different) circumstances or if we just somehow become immune to the sadness, but it does seem to get easier.

    Be happy with everything you have now. Always tell those that you love, that you do love them. Never take your way of life for granted. It only takes one moment to forever change a life and a family. In the blink of an eye, your entire life can be transformed.

    I have faith too in God. God doesn't give us more than we can handle, though sometimes the weight of the burden can bring us to our knees. I am thankful though that I have a strong family support system to help get thru these very tough times.

    Finally, I do try to realize that the Christmas season is temporary. And, even though it seems to start earlier each year (another story), perhaps next year it will be with happier circumstances for our family. So, thanks for reading this far. And....ho ho ho, merry christmas. (Purposefully not capitalized).
    Last edit by Joe V on Jan 24, '17
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    8 Comments

  3. by   dianah
    Thank you for this.
  4. by   Esme12
    ((HUGS))
  5. by   VivaLasViejas
    (((((traumaRUs)))))
  6. by   BCgradnurse
    ((((Trauma))))-wishing you peace.
  7. by   Esme12
    It sure has been a tough year. sigh
  8. by   sharpeimom
    Sending you hugs.
  9. by   traumaRUs
    Thanks everyone...not looking for pity just a quiet reminder that for many people, this is not a happy season.
  10. by   nurseprnRN
    {{{{traumaRUs}}}}

    This too shall pass. Warmest best wishes for the deep midwinter yet to come, and hell, the spring equinox is only 13 weeks away.


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