answering machines

  1. I've posted a similar topic under "hey all OB nurse" about getting a machine for the unit and playing creative messages on it. After I did that I thought it would be fun to hear other inventive answering machine messages. I bet the ER would be creative, "You have reached the ER, no one can come to the phone right now, if you have a bullet wound to the gut, press 1. If you have a knife in the back, press 2. If you have a runny nose then damn it! Hang up the phone and get the hell off my line and go to the hospital across town you big baby!! *Beep*

    Link to "hey all OB nurse": http://allnurses.com/bb/cgi/ultimate...&f=91&t=000173

    [ June 08, 2001: Message edited by: bshort ]
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  2. 4 Comments

  3. by   CC NRSE
    LMAO!!! You are too funny!!! I actually thought about this post yesterday when the phones in our unit wouldn't stop ringing. Everytime we would go into a patients room the phone would ring. I finally decided just to let it ring and not try to kill myself to get to the phone.
  4. by   neonnurse2
    C'mon CC! You gotta think of an inventive message, please refer to my "hey all OB nurses" post
  5. by   Janet Barclay
    Hey Neon,
    We did that too! The ICU/CCU is the code team for the hospital and we have the "Bat Phone" that rings when there is an in-house code.
    We Decided to make an answering machine message for this phone.
    -if the patient only fainted, press 1 for someone who cares
    -if you are on ortho resident looking for help with a sick patient press 2 and we will redirect your call
    -if this is a real code hang up now and we will be there in two minutes.
    -if the patien is over 80 hang up now!
    -if the word terminal figures anywhere in the patient's diagnosis hang up now!! for the love of God!
  6. by   JennieBSN
    Originally posted by neonnurse2:
    <STRONG>I've posted a similar topic under "hey all OB nurse" about getting a machine for the unit and playing creative messages on it. After I did that I thought it would be fun to hear other inventive answering machine messages. I bet the ER would be creative, "You have reached the ER, no one can come to the phone right now, if you have a bullet wound to the gut, press 1. If you have a knife in the back, press 2. If you have a runny nose then damn it! Hang up the phone and get the hell off my line and go to the hospital across town you big baby!! *Beep* </STRONG>
    LMAO, ROFL!!!! Muhahahahaha!!!! (evil laugh) You guys kill me!!!

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