Am I having Self Pity?

  1. Can I talk with you guys about something? I am having a lot of personal problems right now. My niece who is on her way to Kuwait ended up having a cva a week ago and we just found out over the weekend where she is and what happened.

    You know how I am always talking about my cats (7 of them), I am down to one solid white one named Chevy. We think our next door neighbor took them off somewhere. I have called the pound and they have not seen them.

    My boyfriend has been wonderful. He gave me two roses for Valentine's day on my pillow. He was upset with me last night over something really stupid. I love Michael, but I do not believe that I am in love with him. Does that make sense? He seems like he has a split personality. He is really moody. I have to watch what I say around him. We have been dating 10 years and living together 3. People at work says that I am taking verbal and mental abuse. They say it is time to move on.

    In Algebra, my teacher gave us two sections of math (75 problems) a graphing quiz, a lab assn, and vocabulary that is due Wednesday. I do not understand the math which kinda frustrates me. I thought about this and I really do not know if I need to quit school or what. This is just my second semester. I keep saying to myself that I will be a40 years old when I get done. Well, I will be 40 years old anyway so what is the difference. I keep thinking that I am lucky to have a place pay for my tuition and help me to go to school. I know in my heart I would love to be a RN. I respect all nurses and admire them.

    Am I just having a bad week or what. Am I having self pity? Can somebody please help me..........
  2. 11 Comments

  3. by   Tweety
    You are not having self-pity. Just are acknowledging some serious problems in your life, and you are under a lot of stress. Just as long as you don't wallow in the problems and start thinking about living in some solutions, it's not self-pity. You need to talk about it to process it.

    It is possible to love someone and not be "in love" and be able to live with them. I've been there. Took me a little less than 10 years to figure that out though.

    I'm so sorry about your kitties. If it was your neighbor, cut his balls off.

    Good luck in school!
  4. by   tabbeycatt
    I'm so sorry about your kitties. People can be so mean sometimes. I'm a firm believer that what you do comes back to you... so eventually your neighbor will get his.

    I do think it is possible to "love someone" but not be "in love" with that person. By staying with him is only cheating yourself (and him) of finding that one special person who you will love unconditionally. I know it is hard to let go of a relationship that you have been in for so long. But you won't be truely happy until you search your heart and make some decisions about your future together.

    I really hope you don't give up on school if becoming a nurse is your dream. So what if you are 40 when you finish? The main thing is that you "finish". You need to take advantage now of having your tuition paid for you. That is so wonderful. About your math problem... well math is my weakest subject as well. Can you perhaps talk to your teacher and maybe get a math tutor?

    I hope things look brighter for you tomorrow. Hang in there and remember you have friends who care about you.
  5. by   renerian
    I am sorry your having a tough week. Keep your cat inside so they don't disappear.

  6. by   SmilingBluEyes
    I am so sorry for all your troubles. I agree w/3rd shift. you have serious problems/issues in your life. And while you have the total right to vent, it may be time to take action to change things. Try counseling? I wish you luck! Oh and before I forget, domestic cats belong INSIDE so keep them in...that way, neighbors, kids, maruaders, whatever can do them no harm. I am sorry about them missing.
  7. by   CountrifiedRN
    Ditto what Tabbeycat said.

    Definately find someone to help you with the math. Most schools have a tutoring center.

    Don't give up! This is just a hurdle that you can get over with a little help!

  8. by   cwazycwissyRN
    boy, when it rains, it pours. Good suggesions listed above. Sending sunshine your way.:kiss
  9. by   Robin61970
    (((((HUGS)))) Keep your chin up!
  10. by   Hidi74
    I am sending good thoughts your way........get a good nights sleep and think about it tommorrow......I will be praying for you!!!!Sometimes all the bad stuff hits all at sucks but it will get better. You sound like you have a good head on your shoulders.......Don't let the math get to you.....there is help available.....take advantage of it.... GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!
  11. by   fab4fan

    I don't think you sound self-pitying at all; just overwhelmed with serious problems. I agree, it is possible to love someone while not being in love with that person. If your friends are warning you, maybe it's because they can see something that you cannot...sounds like they're worried and trying to look out for your best interests.

    Math is one of my worst subjects, too. Can you get some tutoring? I do feel for's hoping for better days ahead!
  12. by   Tookie
    My first for your 6 missing cats - cant beleive 6 - that sounds really evil - sorry to say that but very suss.
    I think it is great that you have the confidence that you can ask these questions and examine where you are at
    All i can say is thoghts to you and be strong - you need to focus on what your life is about and where you are going - I only have 1 cat - am having trouble with so many going at once - ?? who could you go to - ie we have the RSPCA here - what would be your equilvanlant

    hang in there
    Tookie with positive thoughts to you.
  13. by   HISSYTHECAT
    I thank you all for the kind words. I would love to keep Chevy in the house cause I know she would be safe. But Michael does not allow any animals in the house.

    I had an algebra test today and failed it flat on my face. I even went to her this morning before class. She has been helping me 3 days a week for about 30 minutes before class starts. She says I stress too much. I told her that I would wait and see what I made on my test and then decide. What she does, is she gives you 8 objectives. If you take the test and fail one of the objectives, she gives you problems to do and then gives you another test to pass. Well, this was the second test and I failed it again. So I ended up getting 2-100, 4-93, and 2-0. That averages to be a 72. I have to make a 75. I am so discouraged and downhearted that it is like why keep trying? I know it would be hard to bring up. She told me maybe I could do better on the next test. That is Monday. I do not understand anything in this section, so how can I do better on that one?

    I know that I will have harder subjects than this to conquer. Anatomy and Physiology I loved it when I took it previously. I do not know how but I ended up making an A.

    Well I have chewed your ears off enough....Thanks for the words :O)