Actual Labels...Funny!

  1. In case you need further proof that the human race is doomed because of stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

    On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

    On a bag of Fritos: ...You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. details inside. (the shoplifter special)?

    On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how???....)

    On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).

    On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down."(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

    On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:"Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought????...)

    On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)

    On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

    On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and...I'm taking this because???....)

    On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

    On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

    On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)

    On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

    On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."

    I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for
    this one:

    On a Swedish chainsaw:"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
    (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

    :chuckle
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  2. 13 Comments

  3. by   OBNURSEHEATHER
    Originally posted by J-RN student
    On a Swedish chainsaw:
    "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
    BWAA HAHAHA HAAAA!

  4. by   ayemmeff
    We have blow torch thing for stripping paint,and it says "Do Not use for drying hair" ...You don't say!!!!
  5. by   Rustyhammer
    My brother had a baby stroller that said "remove child before folding stroller".
    And they had one of those warning pictures of a baby getting folded up in the stroller.
    -Russell
  6. by   Stargazer
    Now you guys are making me all paranoid, like maybe I should be checking the labels on my hairdryer or toaster befoe taking them into the bathtub with me to "superheat" the water.
  7. by   nursedawn67
    You know some poor fool somewhere has tried one of these thus necessitating the need for those stickers! LOL
  8. by   at your cervix
    I once say a VCR that had a video included that showed how to hook up the VCR. I guess that once you got the VCR hooked up you could then watch the video just to make sure that you did it right!!
  9. by   Mkue
  10. by   donmurray
    Probably a failed "Darwin," but didn't a guy crash his new Winnebago, then sue because the manual didn't specify that you should not get on the highway, set the cruise control, then go back to make yourself some coffee?
  11. by   babynurselsa
    Nah that is an urban myth.
  12. by   jemb
    One of my favorites was in the elavator where I previously worked. It was posted above the phone compartment in the elavator (the phone that you are supposed to use to call for help if you get stuck).

    It read "In case of emergency, do not panic."

    I can just see a woman in labor stopping to read the sign, then slapping her forehead as she thinks, "wow, glad I read the sign. I almost panicked!".
  13. by   Rustyhammer
    Have you seen the signs in fast food or quickie mart by the front door "These doors are to remain unlocked during business hours"
    I wonder what happened before they put that sign up.
    "UH...I wonder why business is so slow?"
    -Russell
  14. by   Sable's mom
    "Never under estimate the stupidity . . " Isn't that someone's signature? Sorry I don't remember whose, but it sure is true.

    Hate to think of the idiot that attempted to stop a chainsaw chain with his "hands or genitals"

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