Bit off color, but then most of my jokes are.
Toward the end of the golf course, Harry somehow ended in a patch of pretty yellow buttercups. Trying to get his ball back in play, he ended up thrashing just about every buttercup in the patch.
POOF! In a flash and a puff of smoke, a little old lady appeared. She said, "I'm Mother Nature! Do you know how long it took for me to make those buttercups? Just for that, you won't have any butter for your popcorn the rest of your life. Better still, you won't have any butter for your toast for the rest of your life. As a matter of fact, you won't have any butter for anything for
the rest of your life!";
POOF!...she was gone.
After Harry calmed down, he hollered for his friend, Fred. "Fred, where are you?"
Fred yells back, "I'm over here, in the ***** willows."
Harry screams back...."DON'T SWING, FRED!!!!" "For God's sake, DON'T SWING!!"