A Canadian's apology for the last little while

  1. It's funny cause it's a little true and I hope none of you Americans will be offended by it, but take it in the joking way it was meant

    Courtesy of Rick Mercer from This Hour Has 22 Minutes CBC
    Television:

    On behalf of Canadians everywhere I'd like to offer an apology to
    the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very
    well recently and for that, I am truly sorry.

    I'm sorry we called George Bush a moron.

    He is a moron but, it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If it's
    any consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect
    poorly on the people of America. After all it's not like you
    actually elected him.

    I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more
    trees than you doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's
    cheaper and better than your own.

    I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defence I guess
    our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much
    better than yours.

    I'm sorry we burnt down your white house during the war of 1812. I
    notice you've rebuilt it! It's Very Nice.

    I'm sorry about your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your
    beer but, we Feel your Pain.

    I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up
    against a crazed dictator, you wanna have your friends by your
    side. I realize it took more than two years before you guys
    pitched in against Hitler, but that was different. Everyone knew
    he had weapons.

    And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're
    constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way
    which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that
    you're not upset over this. We've seen what you do to countries
    you get upset with.

    Thank you.
    •  
  2. 48 Comments

  3. by   Mkue
    we all need a little humor !:chuckle
  4. by   Stargazer
  5. by   nursenoelle
    hee
  6. by   RNonsense
    ...and sorry for the Carolyn Parrish comment...
  7. by   Mkue
    Originally posted by RNonsense
    ...and sorry for the Carolyn Parrish comment...
    oh yah, that one..lol:chuckle
  8. by   SharonH, RN
    :chuckle
  9. by   joe_public
    And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're
    constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way
    which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that
    you're not upset over this. We've seen what you do to countries
    you get upset with.

    Thank you.

    yeah we are mad.....first iraq, then france...then were coming for British Columbia and Alberta...sorry you get to keep Quebec!

  10. by   anitame
    BBuuuahhhh!! lmao, this is so funny!
  11. by   adrienurse
    Gotta love Rick.

    P.S. I tried to find the nude picture of him and the fish, but alas, it was not to be found.
  12. by   adrienurse
    Now for something completely inflammatory...

    [the following is a song by Musical/commedy group The Arrogant Worms]



    Oh, come back, proud Canadians
    To before you had TV,
    No hockey night in Canada,
    There was no CBC (Oh, my God!).
    In 1812, Madison was mad,
    He was the president, you know
    Well, he thought he'd tell the British where they ought to go
    He thought he'd invade Canada,
    He thought that he was tough
    Instead we went to Washington....
    And burned down all his stuff!

    And the White House burned, burned, burned,
    And we're the one's that did it!
    It burned, burned, burned,
    While the president ran and cried.
    It burned, burned, burned,
    And things were very historical.
    And the Americans ran and cried like a bunch of little babies
    Waa waa waah!
    In the War of 1812!

    Now some hillbillies from Kentucky,
    Dressed in green and red,
    Left home to fight in Canada,
    But they returned home dead
    It's the only war the Yankees lost, except for Vietnam
    And also the Alamo... and the Bay of... ham.
    The loser was America,
    The winner was ourselves,
    So join right in and gloat about the War of 1812

    And the White House burned, burned, burned,
    And we're the one's that did it!
    It burned, burned, burned,
    While the president ran and cried.
    It burned, burned, burned,
    And things were very historical.
    And the Americans ran and cried like a bunch of little babies
    Waa waa waah!
    In the War of 1812!

    In 1812, we were just sittin' around,
    Mindin' our own business, puttin' crops into the ground.
    We heard the soldiers coming and we didn't like that sound.
    So we took a boat to Washington and burned it to the ground.

    Oh... we... fired our guns, but the Yankees kept-a coming,
    There wasn't quite as many as there was a while ago.
    We fired once more and the Yankees started running,
    Down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico, oh, oh....
    They ran through the snow and they ran through the forest,
    They ran through the bushes where the beavers wouldn't go.
    They ran so fast, they forgot to take their culture,
    Back to America, and Gulf and Texaco

    So, if you go to Washington, its buildings clean and nice,
    Bring a pack of matches, and we'll burn the White House twice!

    And the White House burned, burned, burned,
    But the Americans won't admit it
    It burned, burned, burned,
    It burned and burned and burned
    It burned, burned, burned,
    Now, I bet that made them mad
    And the Americans ran and cried like a bunch of little babies
    Waa waa waah!
    In the War of 1812!

  13. by   Mkue
    yah, we know where you live adrienurse

  14. by   Dplear
    speaking of Canadians....anyone ever see the movie Candian Bacon??????

    quotes from the movie:

    Candy Striper: Oh we're not doctors. We're candy stripers! Our universal health care system has determined that you don't actually need a doctor until... Candy Striper: ...2006!

    Boomer: I'll tell ya another thing: their beer sucks! (john Candy)

    Gus: Canadians are always dreaming up a lotta ways to ruin our lives. The metric system, for the love of God! Celsius! Neil Young!

    [TV Announcer describes the Canadian National Tower in Toronto] TV Announcer: It is the height of six American football fields, or five Canadian football fields. As if Canadian football really counts.

    TV Announcer: Think of your children pledging allegiance to the maple leaf. Mayonnaise on everything. Winter 11 months of the year. Anne Murray - all day, every day.

    President: You sold control of American missiles to a foreign country? Hacker: If you can call Canada foreign. Smiley: Or a country.

    Highway Patrolman: I do have to fine you. That will be a thousand dollars Canadian, or 10 American dollars if you prefer.

    Mountie: Who are you? Boomer: I'm your worst nightmare. I'm a citizen with a constitutional right to bear arms!
    --------------------

    gotta love that movie....all the major actors were Candian.....

    Dave

close