My brother turns 20 this spring, and is dating an 18 yr old he has known for a few years. She's 5 months pregnant, and had just been dumped by her ex-fiance when she and my brother hooked up. I was skeptical about that to begin with, but since they've hooked up, she's had him at her beck and call. He lives about 30 miles out of town, and about 45 miles from her, but he drives to her house at least 3 out of the seven days a week to spend the night with her because she works the closing shift at a fast food joint. Lately it has been runs to the ER late at night (three in the past two weeks)...he picks her up, takes her to the hospital, stays the whole time, and then drops her off at home where she goes to bed and he goes to work a 10 hr shift at a factory. Lather, rinse, repeat. I asked him what she was always going in for, and it ranges from her chest hurt (she had bronchitis), she had a back ache, to she slipped at work and fell, wanted to make sure she didn't have a concussion.
She called my brother at 7 pm tonight after he got off work at 5:30 pm, he drove to her work, picked her up and took her to the ER, and is still there, because the triage nurse isn't real worried. Then he has to drop her off back at home at some god-forsaken hour of the night, and get back here for a change of clothing to drive back to town to work.
He's overdrawn on his bank acct b/c of all the gas he's burning to see her, he hasn't showered in a few days, and I'm terrified that he'll fall asleep at the wheel and crash into a bad wreck.
But everytime I try talking to him about it, he gets all Romeo and starts in about how no one wants them to be together, she's just misunderstood, they're young but not dumb, insert other melodramatic teenage starry-eyed expression here.
I don't know how to reach him, but I don't want her to use him until she's over the other guy and then kick him to the curb, or just use him for a cheap taxi/hand holder/babywatcher.
Any ideas? Is this really something where he has to get burned to learn not to play with the matches? I'm 11 years older than he, so he tends to bristle at my mothering, even though I was wiping his snot nose and tying his shoes not that long ago.