have you ever felt the feeling in your gut for a lack of a better word that someone doesn't like you even if they've never said a word? guess what that feeling is dead on. having said that, body-language tends to be ignored or overlooked if you will, when others are sending us a clear message. unquestionably, our bodies constantly express what we truly feel. my question is can anyone testify to this? let give you a personal example:
when i came to the states in '94 and i landed a position at a prestigious well known hospital in nyc, i was introduced to the icu/ccu staff as is the custom. however, right away i noticed that one team member pretended to be busy as they tried to introduce me to her. undoubtedly, her body language gave her away. in addition, to make matters worse she was assigned as my preceptor. needless to say, those few weeks were the most intense of my career, having to explain to her my every move and actions even though i was already a seasoned nurse. first of all, i went to work with the attitude of loving my new job and making and it work with the nurse in question. although, my preceptor didn't appreciate what i brought to the team, every time we would begin a task, for instance, starting an iv, she would say "tell me i don't have to baby- sit you on how to start an iv?" or in front of the pt. and their family she would ignore me and began a rapport with them and when i said "excused me i'm going to check on so and so" she would get this disgusted face and gruntingly would say as she raised her index finger "excuse me i'm having a conversation with this family, listen let me take care of this new nurse! you guys take care". needless to say, this went on for the entire time i was precepted by her. therefore, one day i came in after dealing with my children and missing my train connection to work, mind you i wasn't late, and as i entered the unit i said my good morning's to everyone as the nurse in question which i'll addressed as "miss congeniality" made a disapproval sound with her throat. i counted to ten and approached her in a professional manner and asked to have a word in private with her which she declined. therefore, i contacted the nm and ask for the three of us to meet in private. granted, not to my surprise, miss congeniality acted like she didn't know what i was talking about and became almost hurt by my accusations of her behavior. with that said, some nurses don't ever confront their "miss congeniality" for fear of retaliation, or hurting someone's feelings. furthermore, some even go to the extreme to say why bother nothing is going to change therefore, they remain silent. admittedly, not having the conversation is far worse, is like the growing gangrene the only solution left is to amputate the source. lastly, i took my faith in my own hands when the nm asked me in our meeting if i felt ready to work on my own. i replied "yes". in conclusion, after several years went by along with several promotions that yours truly earned, one of them becoming the new nm since no one else cared for the challenge. i shall leave you with the thought to ponder if any of you are going through the same situation or know of someone that is, not everyone we meet is going to like us. however, we need to learn how to work side by side and coexist with these individuals in our workforce. in the same way, be aware of the "body language", it speaks volumes.
Jun 17, '12
by Hygiene Queen, RN Guide
Years as a dorky social misfit did me a favor: I was always on the "outside" observing, so I read people very well.
I have coworkers who, to me, it is obvious that they don't care for me. There is a coldness and, yes, I perceive it in body language and subtle facial expressions. It is almost like an actual gut-twinge of negative energy.
Fortunately, having been a social misfit also makes me much thicker-skinned about it.
Then you sense the "I-like-you" body language...
The "I-am-a-pervert" body language...
And the worst: "I-am-sending-off major-energy-like-Ted Bundy" body language... oh my.
I always listen to my gut.
Last edit by Hygiene Queen on Jun 17, '12
: Reason: Format