I Am Now As Old As Dirt...

  1. I am now 'old as dirt'. Enjoy

    Someone asked the other day, 'What was your favorite fast food when you were growing up?'

    'We didn't have fast food when I was growing up,' I informed him. 'All the food was slow.'

    'C'mon, seriously. Where did you eat?'
    'It was a place called 'at home,' I explained. ! 'Mum cooked every day and when Dad got home from work, we sat down together at the dining room table, and if I didn't like what she put on my plate I was allowed to sit there until I did like it.'

    By this time, the kid was laughing so hard I was afraid he was going to suffer serious internal damage, so I didn't tell him the part about how I had to have permission to leave the table.

    Here are some other things I would have told him about my childhood if I figured his system could have handled it:

    Some parents NEVER owned their own house, wore Levis, set foot on a golf course, traveled out of the country or had a credit card.

    My parents never drove me to school. I had a bicycle that weighed probably 50 pounds, and only had one speed, (slow).

    We didn't have a television in our house until I was 19. It was, of course, black and white, and the station went off the air at midnight, after playing the national anthem and a poem about God. It came back on the air at about 6 a.m. and there was usually a locally produced news and farm show on, featuring local people...

    I never had a telephone in my room. The only phone was on a party line. Before you could dial, you had to listen and make sure some people you didn't know weren't already using the line.

    Pizzas were not delivered to our home... But milk was.


    All newspapers were delivered by boys and all boys delivered newspapers --my brother delivered a newspaper, six days a week. He had to get up at 6AM every morning.

    Movie stars kissed with their mouths shut. At least, they did in the movies. There were no movie ratings because all movies were responsibly produced for everyone to enjoy viewing, without profanity or violence or most anything offensive.

    If you grew up in a generation before there was fast food, you may want to share some of these memories with your children or grandchildren. Just don't blame me if they bust a gut laughing.

    Growing up isn't what it used to be, is it?

    MEMORIES:

    My Dad is cleaning out my grandmother's house (she died in December) and he brought me an old Royal Crown Cola bottle. In the bottle top was a stopper with a bunch of holes in it.. I knew immediately what it was, but my daughter had no idea. She thought they had tried to make it a salt shaker or something. I knew it as the bottle that sat on the end of the ironing board to 'sprinkle' clothes with because we didn't have steam irons. Man, I am old.

    How many do you remember?

    Head lights dimmer switches on the floor.
    Ignition switches on the dashboard.
    Pant leg clips for bicycles without chain guards.
    Soldering irons you heat on a gas burner.
    Using hand signals for cars without turn signals.

    Older Than Dirt Quiz :
    Count all the ones that you remember not the ones you were told about.......
    Ratings at the bottom.

    1. Candy cigarettes
    2. Coffee shops with tableside juke boxes
    3. Home milk delivery in glass bottles
    4. Party lines on the telephone
    5. Newsreels before the movie
    6. TV_ test patterns that came on at night after the last show and were there until TV shows started again in the morning. (there were only 3 channels [if you were fortunate]
    7. Peashooters
    8. Howdy Doody
    9. 45 RPM records
    10. Hi-fi's
    11. Metal ice trays with lever
    12. Blue flashbulb
    13. Cork popguns
    14. Studebakers
    15. Wash tub wringers

    If you remembered 0-3 = You're still young
    If you remembered 3-6 = You are getting older
    If you remembered 7-10 = Don't tell your age,
    If you remembered

    11-15 =You're older than dirt!

    I might be older than dirt but those memories are some of the best parts of my life.
    Last edit by Joe V on Mar 17, '17
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  2. 28 Comments

  3. by   amoLucia
    Really enjoyed this post. Will not disclose my age but ... I'd like to add:

    1 - bread home delivery
    2 - Mickey Mouse Club with Annette, Bobby, Karen, Darlene, Cubby, et al
    3 - American Bandstand (in black & white) out of Philadelphia
    4 - candy necklaces (edible)
    5 - pop-it bead toy necklaces (looked like faux pearls and were inedible)
    6 - wooden paddle with the rubber cord and ball on the end
    7 - drinking glasses that came in soapsuds boxes
    8 - drinking glasses that held sourcreme or jelly when you bough them
    9 - S & H greenstamps (and other local ones)
  4. by   NutmeggeRN
    Crap! I am old!!!
  5. by   amygarside
    For me, age is just relatively true to oneself. Same with "time". I don't really care how old I am. As long as I know I am happy, that's enough.
  6. by   Ruby Vee
    Ah, the party line! I'm glad I'm not the only one who remembers it. I got most of my sex education listening to the teenager on the neighboring farm talk to her boyfriend for hours at a time!

    Remember parking your standard transmission vehicle on a hill so if it wouldn't start in the morning you could roll it down the hill to pop the clutch and make it start?

    I remember chamber pots and an outdoor bathroom called an out house, a back house or a "two holer." And yes, sometimes a family member really WOULD come and sit down next to you.

    I remember heating with wood -- frying on the front and freezing on the back. Or vice versa, depending upon which side you had turned toward the stove.

    I remember milking cows by hand, too. Before and after school. And then driving the milk to the cheese factory in a pick up truck so old the floor boards were completely rusted through and you had to be careful where to put your feet.
  7. by   imintrouble
    I'm a "don't tell your age".

    Thanks to all for reminding me of all the things I'd forgotten.
  8. by   Davey Do
    Quote from sharpeimom
    metal ice trays with lever
    water-miracle-jpg
  9. by   VivaLasViejas
    Yep, it's official.......I am older than dirt! Haha!
  10. by   Cat De
    Quote from Davey Do
    water-miracle-jpg
    I just want everybody to know that that's me on the left and when Kool-Aid was put in with the ice we thought we were high class!
  11. by   toomuchbaloney
    I commented to my DH just today that I am officially old as dirt because only 3 of my gang of urban ruffians died before adolescence as we played with risk, unnecessary roughness, and far too little adult supervision. Today they might be deaths by gunshot or other random violence, back then they were deaths by stupidity.
  12. by   Student Mom to Three
    I had a paper route! Back in 1979. Earned enough to buy my very OWN 13" portable B&W TV!
    I feel sorry that kids these days can't have paper routes anymore. At least in my area all the papers are delivered by adults driving by and throwing papers out their car windows.
  13. by   dt70
    [FONT=HelveticaNeue][FONT=HelveticaNeue][FONT=HelveticaNeue][FONT=HelveticaNeue][FONT=HelveticaNeue][FONT=HelveticaNeue][FONT=helvetica][FONT=helvetica][FONT=helvetica]nice list
  14. by   Davey Do
    thta-sucked-jpg

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